If you go out of your mind where do you go to?
Is there a right mind0?
Aand if you are not in your right mind is there more than one wrong mind?aa
To the mindless the body is a joy until they walk having front of the traffic and get run over.
I had the fastest mind in the university or should speed only apply to the brain?
The heart can break when we are distressed what does it do when we are happy?
What does be mindful mean?a
Burnt to Sienna the grass on the marsh was dry
Suddenly it flamed into fire, witness the sky.
I was reading to you and I saw nothing at all
But I felt the heat in my flesh and the brick wall
Blaze blaze you fires in the earth create
The fires of love burn stronger than the fires of hate
Joy and woe are woven fine
A clothing for the soul divine
By William Blake
Mirror mirror on the wall
Boris Johnson had a fall
Soon he’ll be a millionaire.
Life in Britain is unfair.
We can’t afford to see at night
The nuclear bomb will give us light
Mr Putin’s very kind
I only wish he had a mind
What he reflects on needs deep thought
Or he won’t know just what he’s caught
The deep sea diver find a wreck
Get inspectors out to check
If we have a lot of strikes
We can’t visit their websites
We can’t use our laptops fine
Somebody has to draw the line
Only as a last resort
Get the leaders out to talk.
No that Gorbachev f has died
Sense and reason are defied
May I borrow your hanky ?
I want to blow my nose..
Try hitting it instead
Can’t I blow my own trumpet?
I don’t know I 02never seen you before I don’t even know if you have got a trumpet.
It’s a figure of speech.
Oh I thought it was a wind instrument.
They are not mutually exclusive you knowA
Mutually exclusive. That sounds like love or friendship
But surely you can love a friend. and you could befriend your lover.
It depends on what you mean by love
Yes I understand perfectly
No I’m not.
I would rather be normal
Could I borrow your Tampax
I’ve only got the one inside of me
That’s alright as long as it’s not full.
I can’t see it.
Oh dear I didn’t realise you were blind.
It’s raining very hard can I borrow your Mac?
What’s rain got to do this computers?l
Have you got Windows 11?
Qq I misheard you I thought you said Widows 11.
You know perfectly well I don’t play football
May I borrow your hearing aid ?
Sorry I thought you were my father. May I borrow your spectacles
So I can see who you are
A few years ago I was in Argos
I was looking at one of the catalogues when a woman who was also looking at the catalogues nearby came over to me me.and said
Let me borrow your glasses.
I had just got some new ones and they were expensive
So I said why do you want them?
She said I want them to read this catalogue
I said there are varifocal lenses and not reading glasses. And in any case the scripture would not be right for you
She got quite angry And was saying give them to me give them to me
I decided to leave.
When I told one of my friends they said, she was probably going to steal them.
May I borrow your mind?
You’ve got to know your own first
Do you want to keep this television?
Just until it goes off.
Shall I put it in the fridge?
You should get your eyes tested
Shall I get them vaccination? a
Have you got a sleeping tablet?
No I always turn them off
He is the sort of person who
Helps blind people across the road even if they don’t want to. go
Who always crosses the road on a zebra crossing even if he has to paint it himself first.
Goes to confession every year even if she has not committed a sin
Never gets angry even if I phone her at 3 am I’ve got a cold
Always takes the neighbours dogs for a walk even if they have none
Always feeds the neighbours cats even when they would prefer mice.
Always asks his dates if they would like to go to bed with him just in case they are too shy to mention it
Sleeps in the dog’s kennel if the dog wants to sleep on her bed
Has had cat flaps put in the front door and the back door so the cat doesn’t have to walk round the side of the house