Put down at a meal:Reflections

Thinkings and poems 1 Minute

Photo0320 Photo0316 Photo0315ReceApple tree and sunshine

Recently  I was invited to a meal with someone who used to live near me.Unfortunately, despite this being meant to help me during my mourning period she came out with some very wounding remarks.I only mention one here

She has never seen my blog but she did tell me once my poems are no good.Well, at the table ,as we ate she told me  that men would only come to my blog to pleasure themselves whilst looking at my .photo.I was dumbstruck.She made other crude remarks about men.She seems to have a low opinion of them.

I don’t mind if people think poorly of my poems because I know which ones are good.And some are not as good.But I am not sitting an exam in poetry writing.I do it because I love doing it and because I could do it while nursing my poor husband for so long.

And I have met some really nice people here as well and seen what a wealth of creative talent there is in many people which they can use to do their photography, write poetry or write about whatever topics they enjoy, from describing their home cities to cookery and philosophy.

I  believe this “lady”  is mistaken.But as I  feel more vulnerable while I grieve I am going to be more choosy about whom I interact with in the real world.And I’d say  you to do the same.Don’t go to visit people  when you are grieving unless you know they are kindly disposed towards you.And when you are bereaved be careful as some people use it as an excuse to visit you or take you out but it’s not for your sake, in fact.I feel this lady is herself sexually attracted to me.

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Published by Katherine

Poetry writer and author

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8 thoughts on “Put down at a meal:Reflections”

  1. Thank you so much, Tish.There are many good people here and while some common sense is needed I feel it’s bad to say what she said to me.But I think she must be very unhappy or in pain to make her get spiteful.It was just not right to say it then.
    Yes,the analogy with a foreign country is a good one.And gradually we find ways of moving along and getting accustomed to the new life.
    I am just going to post what I hope is the final letter to the Tax Office.So many phone calls etc… but I am enjoying seeing my new acers growing and wondering how they will look in Autumn.
    Thanks once again.:)

    1. Thank you,Tish. We both had serious things in the past eighteen months but it helped me to write even though sometimes it was not as good as formerly.
      Now I have just about finished the legal and finacial aspects I am feeling very lethargic.Possibly grieving can’t go forward until there is a space.But I have noticed before people can pretend to want to hlp but it may be they are lonely or sad.I don’t mind unless they them hurt me or tell me inappropriate things.I have a friend who is severely depressed and I will talk to her even noow while I am grieving,,, but thanks so much for your reading and your comments…as one of the most interesting people I’ve come across here on WP.

      1. When the big things in life and death descend – loss, illness – you end up in a foreign country somehow; the rest of the world is not articulating with you, or you with it. I’m wishing you all the resources you can muster to find your way through this difficult terrain. I have not been there myself. But I can see it’s tough. I feel you have many resources. And as you say, there has to be some open space ahead. You may not see it yet. But you WILL. It is there.

  3. “I do it because I love doing it” – what better reason could there be? I suppose the only caveat is that the web provides little ‘peer review’ so a fair bit of self-discipline is required.

    I have some reservations about the principle “Don’t go to visit people unless you know they are kindly disposed towards you.” It might be necessary at the personal level, at times when we are feeling vulnerable, but dialogue between people with different views is essential, if we are to minimise conflict. I think this is particularly important at present, as UK politics enter what could be a significant new phase.

    1. I should have said,don’t visit people who are not kindly disposed to you when you feel very vulnerable.Often at work I had to meet some people of that sort but we had an agenda and other people were present.When it is one to one it is more of a problem.Thank you for your comment,Mike.My husband used to help me because he was quite critical and other people such as yourself and Bushka have also given me useful thoughts for improvement.

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