Did I say that?

I went to bed with Eamonn.But she wasn’t
I lay down with a lion.What a lamb
I went to the Ladies.What a gent!
I went to an all female college but I’m not
I thought I was going mad but it’s only paranoia.It’s normal
I sometimes say to myself, are we still here? Then once I heard a voice saying,No!
I bought a book.It’s in invisible ink.What a relief!
The hairdresser said, is it you, again? I said , no, it’s me.
I went to the coffee shop but it was full of foreigners.People from Blackburn,Worcester,Bath,Wells and Bristol.Send them back, London is full.
As for the Irish, send us back free and then I shall kiss the Blarney Stone
What do you mean,I’m a foreigner? I’m a Viking.So behave

Messages

My neighbour is from Cardiff in South Wales

Sally thinks I’m very young

I must get married with a song

Her interest makes my heart fall down and wail.

But when I dream deep in my sleep

I’ll meet a man and he will never fail

My fantasies will make men weak

Their knees are knocking like birds beaks

Now there’s thunder lightning fog and acid hail

From the Gaza strip

I had a doctor from the Gaza strip

The constant warfare made this doctor quit

But when he came to the UK

They said Oh refugees can’t play

So then he told them they should watch their lip.

But is he still a refugee

Surfing words where ere they be ?

He could pay his way if he could work

Eating shingle from the sea

The dying fish make one last plea.

To Westminster they’re going in a ship

Are you bitter?

https://www.psychologytoday.com/gb/blog/insight-is-2020/201910/how-understand-and-handle-bitter-people

V

anger and sadness.

Part of what makes bitterness a complex emotion is that it also includes disappointment, or the experience of having been disappointed as a pattern of behavior over time. Disappointment, is a complex emotion, too, because disappointment involves sadness, but it also includes other layers. If you think about disappointment, you realize that anger may be in that mix, as well (feeling angry that things didn’t work out better or that your particular needs did not get met).

Hallelujah

He said he’s got hallelujah

What’s that, a cousin of halitosis?

Well think about it. Leonard Cohen would have not been successful he had sung

Halitosis halitosis Hally toe oh oh oh oh oh Sis.

In a few years nobody will know what halitosis is

Nobody will have bad breath in a few years?

No they will just call it bad breath because halitosis is too complicated to learn

Well it’s not that bad to spell is it?

It’s not as difficult as halleluja do you think hallelujah is Jewish?

I’m afraid I don’t know  that but Leonard Cohen was

Yes the word Cohen means priest. All the priests are descended from Aaron and if you are male and descended from Aaron you are a priest

So you are a priest if and only if if you are a male descendent of Aaron?

Precisely.

But I don’t want to be a priest

But you’re not jewish!

We can’t be sure because he might have had  illegitimate children

I think I better get you some Prozac

Will it make me feel Jewish?

I don’t think anybody could feel Jewish if they had not been brought up in a Jewish household

So it’s not genetic then?

The genes don’t work if they’re not put in the right environment.

Like many human beings.

Yes if there were no dirty kitchen then women wouldn’t feel like cleaning them1p

P I’m beginning to get the hang of this. So if there were no churches or synagogues or mosques nobody would feel like praying.P

Except when they were having a heart transplantP

Why would that be different?

They could be staring death in the face.

I didn’t know that deatg5 had a face

It’s metaphorical!

Well if you see it coming in the door

If it is going to come it will come

That’s what my mother used to say when I was constipated.

Savings in Britain

How many people in the UK have over 100000 in savings?

15% of subscribers saved at the maximum in 2019 to 2020, rising to 39% of those with income of £100,000 to £149,999, and to 60% of those with income of £150,000 or more. The highest proportion of savers, around 54%, saved between £1 and £2,499.8 Jun 2022

https://www.gov.uk › government

Commentary for Annual savings statistics: June 2022 – GOV.UK

Are British people poor?


1 in 10 Brits (9%) have no savings at all. In 2020, the average person in the United Kingdom (UK) had £6,757 saved. A third of Brits have less than £600 in savings. 41% of Brits don’t have enough savings to live for a month without income.28 Jan 2022

https://www.finder.com › saving-stat…

Savings statistics: Average