Did I say that?

I went to bed with Eamonn.But she wasn’t
I lay down with a lion.What a lamb
I went to the Ladies.What a gent!
I went to an all female college but I’m not
I thought I was going mad but it’s only paranoia.It’s normal
I sometimes say to myself, are we still here? Then once I heard a voice saying,No!
I bought a book.It’s in invisible ink.What a relief!
The hairdresser said, is it you, again? I said , no, it’s me.
I went to the coffee shop but it was full of foreigners.People from Blackburn,Worcester,Bath,Wells and Bristol.Send them back, London is full.
As for the Irish, send us back free and then I shall kiss the Blarney Stone
What do you mean,I’m a foreigner? I’m a Viking.So behave

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