Humour in the gloomer


Titles of online articles I have seen [I have not read them ]

Why your organs shrink at menopause and what you can do about it
Do we want to expand them?

How to handle things.[what sort of things?_]

Why or how your finger length reveals your gender [Surely easier just to look at the bosom/ chest?}

Which microwave to buy [Making unstated assumptions;some of us either have none or may have stolen one]

Why you need both metal and silicon whisks [I thought it was breasts just for a moment; now there’s an idea]

Why you need to keep lots of frozen pasta in your kitchen [Try turning off the radiator first and checking the ovens]

Which six cookery books are the best? [Look up restaurants on your smartphone instead] I wonder how many this person has checked.I find ones written for catering colleges are better and cheaper.

Why you should never take a bath
[I find a handbag is quite sufficient in the daytime].

How to entertain at home. [Fall out of bed?]

How to keep your husband happy [Freeze him? Cuddle him? Leave him.Remarry him

Why you should never forget your wedding anniversary
I didn’t know one could

How to have the best number of children

[ Yes, it’s all under our total control]

How to keep your teeth super clean [Stop eating and die?]

Are you bored of sex? [No,I’m bored of reading about it]

How to cure loneliness. [Buy a microwave and some cookery books then invite someone round for a meal]

How to get your bounce back [Buy a dunlopillo mattress?]

Should you take vitamins? [Where to?]

Can you still remember your name [ yes, but I won’t tell you]

I welcome comments and criticism

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