By Katherine

I remember mother’s beauty and her coal stained and cracked hands
Each little line was etched in black, like a map to other lands
She always wore an apron that she made from an old dress
How I loved my mother,I did I must confess.

I remember mother’s beauty and the row of nappy pins
She always wore them like a brooch, while we kids made a din
The baby had her rusks and milk, she had a little pot
She slept inside a cradle then she moved into a cot

I remember most Mam’s cooking, the apple dumplings steamed
The kettle too sat on the fire , I played and then I dreamed
She had a tin of buttons, she was ace at making clothes
She knitted like an acrobat to forget her many woes

Her daddy was a miner till he had a heart attack
He came home black and dusty, then he filled his old tin bath
When he retired he got a dog, he loved her very well
He called her Lassie for her name, she was beautiful , my belle

Her daddy came to see us after our own daddy died
He helped our mother with odd jobs, then we all ate scones and cried


My photo

Would you like a massage?

I’ve never cooked one yet.

Could you use a banana?

I need a hammer for this job.

Would you like a packed lunch?

It will take more than lunch to get a pact signed.

Why does corn flake?

It thinks it’s snow

Why do blood vessels narrow?

To make themselves thinner.

How do you spell artery?

Good guess.

Why is this a bad time for sex?

We don’t need them in South Africa

What is a plateau?

The female form of platoon

So how about cartoon?

The masculine form of cart

How about the eau?

Leave it off.


I drank it

Hope the cartwheels were clean.

Do stop panicking.

Where is he?

With Mrs King.