So why do we use letters in algebra?
Numbers have no phones.
What would happen if parallel lines met,?
Trains would crash
What is the square root of minus 1,?
I didn’t even know numbers had roots square or circular.
How many degrees are there in a right angle?
I thought you got degrees at Uni .
I don’t understand what this right angle is.
It means Looking at the world in the best possible way.
What is trigonometry for?
What is topology?
The height of wisdom
Why do we need numbers?
It takes two to tango.
I have got more and more incontinent.
Do stop admiring Europe
Why do the government tell us to eat more fruit and veg?
To help evacuate the Common Market from our bodies
Why do the government not have enough beds in hospitals?
They can’t all go to sleep at once
Why are the politicians so stupid?
Because we are.
I am still incontinent
Don’t worry, only another week in the EU I’ll apply for an Irish passport You’re not Irish No, but my parents were
I will miss the Spanish omelettes
But you never go there.
I will not miss Mass on Sundays.
I will become an atheist and worship myself for an hour.Much more satisfying.
I wonder how Enlightened we are.
Well, the light is not the problem.It’s the vision.
I saw the Light once
God is love
So is real love God?
Can we go on the Trans Siberian Express?
Where to ?
She has no moral flaws so I feel inferior.
So,….,I have become impotent.
Is impotence grounds for divorce?
Yes if it is only with her.
You / have another woman?
In my mind!
So why are you asking for a no faults divorce?
He has no faults, he is just ugly?
Was he better when you married him?
I was blinded by love
I see but you don’t
My photo 2015
We never get washed at the weekend
We like to be dirty like coal
But when mother visits
She will say what is this is
Get me hot water and bowl
In the past people were dirty
But people looked roughly the same
Now we are phobic
We feel like a cat yet untamed
Our natural odours are sexy
Our nature propels us to mate
So get washed less often
And deodorant freshening
For procreation it’s never too late
8. Writing is fueled by hard work rather than innate talent.
“I know some very great writers, writers you love who write beautifully and have made a great deal of money, and not
one of them sits down routinely feeling wildly enthusiastic and confident. Not one of them writes elegant first drafts…For me and most of the other writers I know, writing is not rapturous. In fact, the only way I can get anything written at all is to write really, really shitty first drafts.” -Anne Lamott
Lamott’s line about “shitty first drafts” has gotten a lot of airtime in the writing community. Many writers seem to use it as a rallying cry.
To me, this quote is a great reminder of the fact that authorship is not a land of “haves” and “have-nots.” The world population has not been divided into capable writers and hopeless wannabes.
If even the best writers in the world struggle to write beautiful prose, we know that writing is a learned craft — one in which we can all improve over time.
We by putting in writing time — not by being born with a golden ink pen in our hand. earn the blessing of the Muse
What a my shame my husband is dead
I thought you were unhappy with him
Yes and from Weds I could have got a no faults divorce!
Well why were you keen to hide his faults?
The faults were mine
If he got home late I’d throw his dinner at him.
I wondered why you had so few plates.
I lied about him to the neighbours
Lying is hard when we forget which lie we said to whom,
I told them he beat me
I beat him.
That’s not cruelty
It was to him
But he could have taken lessons
Being a good loser
To your own wife?
Well he was very sarcastic
He said for someone from the poorest street in Lancashire to have got into Cambridge they must have thought I was black