Trust and Vision

tWeeds or flowersI have become interested in virtue and perception.It began when I read  a little Aristotle about virtue being a habit.That was quite recent.Before that for many years I believed virtuous acts would follow from being able to perceive well.
But when we are fraught our minds and eyes tighten up and so we perceive only what may be a danger to us.To perceive others well we need to be in a position to trust others and we need to feel secure.How is this possible?
From my studies I read that our ability to trust begins with a trusted caregiver in infancy,[See” Atttachment and Loss “by John Bowlby] We may be able to become more secure later by good fortune,friendship and love.
If not,I seem to get the idea that if we are insecure and nervous we cannot truly perceive others and they may be in the same position.If we are afraid then virtuous acts may be hard to enact.Whatever virtuous acts are.
The reason is obvious… when. we are concerned with  mere survival  , iwhat we do to others  may be impossible for us to consider.We cannot truly see them and so we cannot act well towards them except by good luck
Or if we are able to tolerate great anxiety,we may see better…. if not we are incapable…. Those whom we cannot see properly we cannot consider with  the   most  feeling  and act on that.We see them partly or mainly in terms of the fearful fantasies in our minds and cannot see them as  other and interesting.
When we make a friend online we may feel safer but in fact we are more likely to misperceive them. When we are from a sad or difficult background it may help greatly if we have some friends who might point out our errors if we trust enough to tell them.
Or we may pretend to be hard an  isd tough.Neither leads to virtue.If we could trust God it may help but I believe we see God through the lens of our parents.. which is not good…depending on the parents.I am unsure if God is herem anyway
When we live in fear,we cannot see what is there before us.We cannot let go.We cannot accept grace and love nor give it.We will try to live by will power.Ironically people who are fearful inside can develop a shell of toughness and pride and so are not seen as vulnerable  and/or lovable.They may seem frightening to others. This account may help to explain why politics is the way it is and also  we see that arguing is not persuasive when the other/ourself   are not able to open up and see things broadly.
Arguing makes us tighten up and see less well.And it can be frightening too though some cultures find it more acceptable than others.

On the other hand,it is risky to be too trusting.Why some  people are  I don’t know but I will try to find out.

This author had a lot to say about perception… http://www.independent.co.uk/arts-entertainment/obituary-marion-milner-1163951.html   http://susannanelson.wordpress.com/2014/03/02/happy-go-lucky/

The coke party

 

Godzilla of the White House

 

Excerpt

 

Their excuses for Trump’s actions had the character of Freud’s famous story of the man accused by his neighbour of having returned a borrowed kettle in a damaged condition: I returned the kettle undamaged; it was already damaged when I borrowed it; I never borrowed it in the first place. Indeed, lawmakers who at first acknowledged an improper quid pro quo but insisted that it did not constitute an impeachable offence, quickly backed off from that heresy. Suddenly the story was, “There was no quid pro quo!” – or, rather, “Of course there was a quid pro quo, but it was completely proper, even laudable!” Or simply, “I’m not even going to discuss what the President did because this whole impeachment thing is a partisan travesty”.

 

Eating crotchets

Avocado and rose petal soup £2
Bean and  wasp mousse £4
Baked beans on Jew’s harp plus  omelette £3
Stiff eggs in green jelly [dyed] £25 or nearest offer
French dressing with pure olive oil free
Italian Wine free to all

Free bread and butter,tea and   cake

Plate £56 [ please wash and return]
Cutlery £.50 [non-returnable]

 

An artist’s canvas stretched , a matricide

Saturday was shopping then a walk
Epping,Ongar,Finchingfield by car
Reading book reviews and chewing stalks
Buttercups and meadows,Henry Moore

Driving back from Chelmsford, cornfields flamed
Smoke and fire and earth, the sun dismayed
Farmers working hard,  a harvest, grain
The sky  through mist a cobalt  blue displayed

Standon with its fords and wandering cows
Little rivers,Essex, flowing down
The Stort joins with the Lea,a gurglimg sound
Water for the Thames  and mossy ground

The earth feels like my body sacrificed
An artist’s canvas stretched , a matricide

 

Swing the lead

 

 

Pamianthe-peruviana_2020-2Do you dislike being all alone?
Should you take your shoes off at home ?
What is the contention in a bone?
Does your shampoo  produce  excessive foam?

Do you like to kiss your cat  at night?
Have you ever seen a golden light?
Do mosquitos love us when they bite?
What is more important than insight?

Do you read  a book or swing the lead?
Do you like to charm your  friend in bed?
Do you   remember what your Mother said?
Why are wizards mentioned when they’re dead?

The cat was killed by  curiousity
I wish he’d kepy a diary for me