Wear flat shoes and never laugh.

I love men, but not the Toffs,
Nor the ones with hacking coughs.
I would like an artist most,
Especially with hot buttered toast.

I love men,do men love me?
There’s only one true way to see.
Do your best to put them off,
Wear flat shoes and never laugh.

Study Wittgenstein and Kant,
Study all that’s difficult.
Parse Quantum theory as a hobby.
Learn long words from the dictionary.

Dance with Riemann,  swing with Joyce;
Read Ulysses in a Rolls Royce.
Enjoy Chess, Trigonometry;
Weigh down your mind with  Geometry.

Look around and see who’s left.
That’s the man who loves you best.
Once you’re wed and have a home,
You can free your mind to roam.

Throw away your library,
Let your senses all run free.
Wear bright clothes and enjoy some fun.
Your second life has just begun.