Doctor I’ve got logghoreah
I feel worn out but I’m still here.
Can you give me a blue pill,
As those bright green ones made me ill.
Oh,dear lady,I can teach you
If the subject’s not taboo.
If you keep your lips quite still
You ‘ll feel much better,I can tell.
Doctor,how can I keep quiet?
Do you offer any diet?
Which sentences are too contrived;
Can you keep my brain alive?
Never use an old cliche;
From the ancient,go astray.
Keep you thoughts inside your head.
If you can’t,then go to bed.
Doctor I am not Herr Freud
Yet I see my well trod road.
I seem to always want a man.
And in my bed I can fit one.
Yes I see you often mention
How your body needs attention.
You need love and so do I
But it’s evil if we try.
Talking ‘s a defence of sorts
Used by folk to control thoughts.
Intellectual word excess
Is your device for happiness.
Yet it does not help your body
To keep on giving testimony.
So throw away your head,my dear
Love a man and lose that fear.
I don’t know that many men;
Maybe I count nine or ten.
Yet I fear they may use me
Merely as the maid at tea.
They may want me to boil their hankies
When what I need is hanky panky.
How can I convert old boys
To make kleenex tissues their first choice?
We don’t learn that when we’re training;
Nor cure depression when it’s raining.
We will have to run a trial.
Drink the oil from this small vial.
What will this oil do to me??
I really need a cup of tea.
Will it increase my libido
I shall not take it if that’s so.
Why don’t you trust me,my dear lady.
Do you think I’m a bit shady?
Well,you’re right,we men are lonely
And we look for ladies homely.
Surely you’ve got one somewhere else.
Doctor’s need them for their health.
Yes, but I prefer your form.
How do you like my nice green lawn?
I prefer a sandy desert.
Lawns are so so last resort
Still we’re here so let’s commence.
I have only got five pence.
We have love so do not worry
Do not be in such a hurry
Catholics can’t have concubines
Yet God made them by design.
We must have missed some useful clue
Bow down in worship of my shoe.
When we can afford a pair.
Then I’ll marry not just stare!