Buy my house

Well the kitchen is ok if you have pliers to turn the Taps on

The cooker is new.I took the door off the grill to see how it worked but never got round to putting it back.

Who needs a door on the grill?

The floor is concrete You just need some lino over it or cork

The best cupboards have no doors.The doors can swing out and hit you!

Then you can see inside more easily too

Don’t bother washing up.Get a dishwasher

You get the idea

We dwell in academic squalor.Where do you live