I practically exist, throw me a rope

I told the doctor I’d only had sex with one man
She said, why ,you are practically a virgin
Well, it’s like my thesis.I practically got a degree
And I practically had 5 children
I practically got a job at a top University
Until they saw my engagement ring
Well it was a moonstone which is practically a diamond to the shortsighted
So when I practically died my husband pulled me back
I slipped and practically fell off the Cliffs at Dover
I think I am old,practically, and too worn out for another man
Or anyone who is practically a man.
Gosh, I am practically politically incorrect
What am I practicing for,practically speaking
At least I am not perfect, no……not again

God be with you

Bring your own God with you, you can’t help it anyway
I have heard you singing, don’t tell me you can’t pray
We’re strung like beads along a chain, we’re linked with none left out
Every time that someone dies, there opens a new mouth
Mouth brings voice, the people’s choice, there is no faking Truth
Eat and live, speak and grieve, give and so receive
Eyes to see and ears to hear,grace may be about
Still the Sirens wail and moan, leave them, they can’t count

From Susan Stebbing [first woman professor of philosophy in the UK in 1933]

Photo by Jill Burrow on Pexels.com

Be wary of emotive language


Stebbing distinguishes between two types of language: “scientific” and “emotive”. Scie]ntific language is used to make objective claims. Emotive language is intended to evoke strong feelings. Often, in politics (and journalism), emotive language is disguised as scientific language –- giving words “a significance in addition to their objective meaning”. Think of the way “woke” is used by right-wing commentators. It isn’t so much describing someone, as getting you to feel a certain way about them.

Paying attention to whether politicians are trying to appeal to our emotions can help us tell a convincing argument from a cheap, emotional dog whistle. We can then decide whether to allow ourselves to be persuaded by our feelings or to turn to more objective forms of evidence.

American names

As Mary went intoAlice’s living room,she saw her five children playing cards with a cat
Hello, Mary, let me introduce my children
Tangent is 13, Radius is 11, Euclid and Leibnitz are twins aged 8
and Cyclic is 4
So what is your surname?
Thanks.Shall I sit down?
Tangent Blunder,Mary thought, puzzled by such choices
Sit down! I thought you were my new cleaning lady
What is she called?
I never asked her
Well, you certainly need a cleaning person
Suppose they are binary?
Are you a maths teacher?
No,I hated quadratic equations
Thanks be you didn’t call a child Quadratic
That’s the dog’s name
And the cat?
Well, you seem a very clever family
What do you mean?
You can’t live here, you will have to emigrate to the USA
They also use unusual,chaotic names.Odd as they are so religious
Jesus Christ !
Not yet but Trump may make a second coming
Well.f*ck me
Not in front of the children, thanks
I only charge £27.
I am a woman too
I don’t mind.I am binary
Binary Blunder, you are giving me headache
Well, you know where the door is
Where you came in
I am supposed to assess you for autism
Ooh, that’s nice name.What does she want?
It’s a differently wired brain.Einstein was famed
Did he have to charge it?
No, he was born with it but noone knew
I prefer Angst.Can you test me for that?
What a blunder
Mary ran out of the door.Everything looked blurred
and too shiny
Don’t tell me this is the end,she whispered