Oh,I always wanted to  have thinner hair.It dries faster
I’m glad I can take my teeth out at night though I prefer aural sex, polo  necks,feeling vexed, being perplexed
I wish our eyes came out and we could have new ones every day
I love being so fat.I can’t buy new clothes so I save the money to buy more food, to he rude, to  send clues, please peruse
I  never wanted to speak another language.There are still English words I’ve never heard of like ?
I like being  old.I want to go to Heaven and if there is none I won’t know,will I?
I like being disabled as they put me in a wheelchair at the hospital.It’s like being a toddler again
I gave the cab driver  £20 and  he  drove me round the bend
I gave the next one  £30 and he drove me round the bend and  over a Zebra crossing
I said I had no money so he  kept me in the cab  until I gave him  hell.Well I don’t own heaven

“To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first, and call whatever you hit the target.”– Ashleigh Brilliant