You know you are poor when

You put your ancient fridge in the garden and nobody steals it.
You can’t afford suncream  even when you’ve had skin cancer.Since you have to wear Factor 50 all the time,why is it not on prescription?
Ditto two standard lamps with no flexes but perfectly ok for anyone with good eyesight to fit a new flex but nobody has taken them .I may put the lamp shades out and see what happens
You wear your underpants inside out on the second day..no thanks”
You only have a bath once a month
You  wash your smalls in the bath with you.
You sing while walking through the town and people throw money at you, except for a few who shout,go back where you came from..That gives me abig choice
You eat  on newspaper instead of a plate.Brown paper  will do as well.
You stop wearing underclothes altogether.Ony suitable for continent ladies with tiny bosoms
You can’t go out for coffee.
You can’t give people gifts
You can’t afford Xmas card and stamps