But it’s wrong to kill and wound.Even yourself ,I had assumed

Pray Father , please hear my confession.I have sinned during this dreadful recession
What,again? What’ve you done,you naughty man? Maybe you stole a pancake pan
Nothing.I did.Nothing at all.Yet I am going up the wall
Then  why are you here? Why do you  fear.Sartre’s nothing  in a bier
That’s what I’d like to know myself.Why have the police  got all my wealth
Well did you walk? Or did you run? Getting to church is such good fun
No the police brought me in a van.I know nothing about a pan
Some folk will die to exercise.Tell me, truly, do you lie
No,I’m a criminal,Father Brown.I am famous in this town
You get free transport from the police? When will you get  the full release?
They were charging me with onanism  just for fun but decided it’s not  done so I said, take me to a priest.He will hear me out at least
I don’t understand, in this sweet  land Why did they  that  think you had sinned
I told  them. myself  for alibi.I thought I’d  give Onan a try.They got me for  murder  which  was  a lie
You should sow your seeds, you know,my son.Some men say it can be fun
I live in a terraced house with  none.I  have not got my own garden
Sow them in someone else’s then.In such a case it is no sin
But isn’t it wrong to offer my sperm to a lady  out of turn?
Everything  is wrong  on earth today.See what the ladies have to say
Well, what a surprise.A shock indeed Are you descended from Augustine’s seed?
He wasn’t married when he died.I don’t know if he had even  tried
But he said before being dead ,Lord,  make me free of lusty thoughts.I’ll get killed if I am caught
True,but it ‘s a very long time  since then.Who can say if he  sinned?
But men still feel like that, don’t they? I have heard some boast all day
So do women,yes they do.But first you have to charm and woo
Well, they’re  ironing and washing.Not so good for heating passion
I think they ought to wash   before they dry.I’m  man, so hi  di hi
I’ll tell them but you tell me Should I wash  before I woo
Before  you woo, what else to do?
Flattening myself with the  red hot iron.Then they’ll love me when I’m dyin’
A novel way  of suicide.I once tried when down in Hythe
I thought I would at least look real  nice.That  makes it worth the heavy price
But it’s wrong to kill and wound.Even yourself ,I had assumed
Everything’s wrong,you told me so.Why not choose the time to go?
But that is wronger than most wrong.The birds will lose their evensongThink of those left  here behind! Keep their faces in your mind
They can follow free of charge.All they need are irons large
If we did that the world would end.Utter blackness would descend
Seems like it’s going   that way now.I’m just helping  in the how
Are you curious to know  who wins the vote?
I have lost my three remotes
Have you got a radio? They will tell you  when they know.
I am sorry for my sins.It seems that evil often wins
For your penance  eat a cake.Then go rambling by the lae.If you see a pretty girl ask her if she’s like a whirl.