My last Confession





Pray Father,give me a Dressing.It is five Tweets since my last Depression
So what have you done now?
Well,as I’ve done nothing wrong today I am suffering from Pride.
You seem to think about yourself too muche
How much is too much,please?
Well,when we are happy and doing something we enjoy,we forget ourselves entirely. and that is the best way to be.But first we need some security.
How can I get that?
You need a spam guard for your mind!At the moment you are on automatic which is the default setting of your brain to act like a reptile…
Thanks very much,Father,I never knew I was a reptile.Did they have scruples..It was kill or be killed
.Don’t you see the scruples are an attack on yourself?The reptile is attacking you… as you have frightening thoughts it’s annoyed.
So how do I rebutt these thoughts?
Say,Alright if I’m the most wicked man in the city,smite me and do your worst.I am not afraid any more..I have done my best and if it’s not good enough strike me dead now or forever give me peace,
And what will happen after that?
Well,we shall see.But you have to face this thing head on.Bring it to a head.Lance the boil.
So if God does smite me dead?
Well, do you really think you are so wicked because you stole a half penny from the charity box fifty years ago?I see it’s a sort of pride… a theatrical display of guilt.Yes, quite right.Anyway, if you survive your ordeal let me know and I’ll give it a try.
Why,don’t say you have scruples too?
Yes,I have scruples about giving advice to people.If they follow it and it’s no good… it worries me…
.Why don’t we do or die together,Father?I’ll give you a buzz.Meanwhile am I absolved?Yes, dear boy.Sometimes I wish I could be dissolved.
.Why is that?I’d like to lose myself.
Why not try reading a good book…
I recommend Nicholas Freeling.But I feel guilty reading.
Now look here,Father,God helps those who help themselves….give yourself a break…A good novel, a cup of tea and a pussy on your knee,you’ll be transformed
.Thank you,my child.Don’t mention it,Father.
Don’t mention what?
They never say.It’s just a phrase or is it a phase?It’s all Greek to me.
I know some very sweet Greeks or are they geeks?
Just one letter can make such a difference..
Write soon