My trousers fell off, as I swerved

I have bought a chair in colours complementary
My life’s becoming  studious and sedentary
It’s soft and warm
with    silky  charm
And yet I would
prefer your arms.
Eccentrically.

I bought a belt which disappeared
My trousers fell off, as I feared
Why not wear a dress,
When pants cause stress?
Why  frocks are best!
Till the police arrest
Argumentatively.

There is a reason for a  skirt
We   find it easier   to flirt
Why wear much else?
I feel your pulse-
It makes me sense
I feel less tense.
Concentrically.

I looked all round for that new belt
I never noticed or even felt
It wasn’t there
Nor on that chair
My ass was bare
In frosty air.
Halleluliah!