How to annoy people

1.Never offer visitors a cup of tea or any other drink
2.Never look at people while you are listening to them
3.Always ask them why they go to the library  so often especially if their partner is present
4.Always ask why they don’t carry a camera all the time like you do
5.Always ask why they  do or don’t  have an i phone.
6.Always  ask if they use  he well known  cookery book  “Left over for tomorrow” by Marika Hanbury Tenison.
7.Take them to Mc Donalds for their dinner.
8.Wash up in between courses while entertaining.Sing as well.Feed the cat and go to the loo before offering pudding.Use the coffee set your in laws gave you.
9.At 9 pm go to bed.Ask them to shut the door when they leave then get up and write your first novel.Then go to bed again.
10.Take a lumia selfie and make it into a poster and ask all your friends  what they think.