How to manage your boss
How to damage your boss
How to savage your boss
How to banish your boss
How to seek for work
How to leak your worth
How to streak and worse
How to meet your curse
How to beat the curse
How to bleat and shirk
How to write poetry and verse
How to import forty whores
How to survive jail and more
How to revive your faith when sore
How to stop selling slaves at the door
How to write a life sentence
How to fight Evil and its allure
How to live well and be pure
How to fib and sell cures
How to tell lies and far more
How to differentiate the truth of calculus from quantu, mechanics
How to integrate panic
How to disintegrate with good manners
How to shorten your nerves [ my nerves are twice the normal size]
How to knit coats for bad nerves
Unnerving for swimmers in life’s sea
Knit yourself well
Cat is my name, what the hell?
Category: humor
I dreamed I rode a tricycle last night
I dreamed I rode a tricycle last night
Large and painted blue without a bell
Then I met my doctor,what a sight
He told me he had lately seen the light
And wished to be a monk inside a cell
I dreamed I rode a tricycle last night
Ted Hughes had gone out fishing for a pike
The army in my head was doing drill
Then I met my doctor,what a sight
I see the almond blossom, what delight
My sister thinks I’ve left her in my Will
I dreamed I rode a tricycle last night
Yet I am weary with my oversight
I am rarely mad enough to kill
Unless I met a doctor out on strike
Because of such a strike I lost my sight
The Eye emergency was left too late
They say that if I sue I’ll feel a chill
Surgeons with knives on my window sill
Eternal love and hate
Everyone wants to be normal
But nobody knows what it is
It must be ouside of us
Or we’d feel what it was
So is it that we are all God?
Why do we want to be normal
Instead of being ourself?
We want acceptance
For sure and not by chance
Not to mention we all want more wealth
Maybe there is nobody normal
The median, the mean or the mode
We all need to deviate
From eternal love and hate
See here what the Greek Gods still owed
The King’s Head!

You’re looking well, the doctor said ironically as I stumbled into his office
Don’t mention it,I replied,It’all Greek to me
Are you drunk, he said solicitously
No and I am not a tart either,I lied truthfully
What a pity,I fancy an apple, he shared
Doctor, keep you voice down.The patients will think you are a pervert.
Well, one tart is as good as another to a dead man
Is that a trope or a simile?
What a pointed question.
But not disappointed?
Who was Adonis?
Mrs Thatcher’s husband with a Lancashire accent
No, it DIS I am thinking of
You seem to be imitating a racist film
Fancy that, without even knowing!
Well, you are a real doctor,I hope
No, but I am rational
I’m afraid you can be counted
But who could count an infinite set?
It’s in theory
That’s intellectuals for you.It can be done in Theory.But where is Theory?
Where intellectuals hang out using their imaginations.
Well, blow me down
Why can’t you jump?
I can only do it in theory
Well, better get on with the surgery.Which head are we cutting off today?
The King’s Head!
Well, it is his turn now….how will he take it?
Under his arm
Like a deodorant?
I can think of better alternatives
Not a pig’s head?
No, an apple in his mouth
See,apples again.Why not go to an Art Class and paint some?
Because my wife won’t eat them painted
How will she know?
Because I have no artist’s palate
Well, it’s never to late to grow your own
I have my own palate
How is that?
It’s like a bed before beds were invented
How come?
It is a bag of straw
But nowadays they don’t sell straw
In case it’s china?
How can one sleep on china?
Go to a Tea Service and ask the Vicar
Ooh, you are artful
You do look well today
Am I the doctor or not?
I don’t know Not
You know Nothing!
When you’re lonely
Mary was feeling lonely on Sunday so she decided to go to the Urgent Care Centre in a cab.There were not many people there but enough to give her 2 hours in the Waiting Room.Having signed in ,by claiming to have a UTI, she took off her red coat bought in 1992 in a Sale, and opened her phone.What to read?
Hitler’s Downfall
Quick Cakes
A few novels by Margaret Drabble
Freud the Fraud
Sex crimes in therapy
The rise of Fascism in Europe
How to care for a husband
The Second Sex
Feminism and Sexual Orders
How to enjoy your body before it is too late
Differential operators and their followers
After 2 hours Mary went to the Unisex toilets.While inside she hear her name called
I’m in here, she shouted.
Take your time
She handed the kind doctor her sample which was very pale
He went out and came in again
You have a nasty infection, he said calmly
What shall I do?
We have some antibiotics here on Sundays.The pharmacy is shut
Thank goodness
He went to see what he could find and handed her a box of pills
It wa nice to meet you doctor, thank you.No wonder I felt odd
Yes, it makes you feel confused and less smart
Indeed.I meant to go to Church but came here by accident
How lucky
Mary went outside and ordered a cab
Well, that was a blessing, she told herself until she saw Annie dressed in purple velvet running down the corridor followed by Emile on a bicycle
Well, that’s what I saw before I took those pills
No words
If we had no language,we’d be good
No communication but by sense
What devil conjured up the demon word
Made our dealings complex and intense?
No Tower of Babel, nothing but mud huts
Caressing,kissing,kicking, real contact
Boxing,wrestling,killing the unjust
No law except the fist. no guilt.no wrack
No religion but a sense of awe
The rising sun, the moon, the distant stars
Oh,bow before the Cedar and the Oak
Anything that is taller than we are
No books, no news no media,no war
It makes me wonder what live words are for
The labour and the hurt that life will cure
I found a pair of knickers on the chair
They must be mine,oh dear, that is bizarre
I did not take them off,I am quite sure
They make the entire room seem quite impure
Yet why are knickers thought to be like porn
When they adorn the place where life is born?
If you hung the washing out to dry
You might see an angel in the sky
Most of us traversed the holy path
We suffered pain but hope it did not last
Mothers too have struggled and endured
The labour and the hurt that life will cure
The simplest items, pretty, well designed
Tomorrow I shall hang them on the line
Fortunately, he cannot bite
I dream at nights of my old friends
My husband and his loving hands
I dream of all the cats we had
Alfred who slept on the bed
He laid his head upon my foot
As I wrote a poem of love
Jimmy who was small and black
She bit my hand if I got up
I did not wish to wet the bed
She did not understand a word I said
The last night here she gazed at me
I think she knew she would not be
Lucky was the nervous one
Black and white , apartheid none
He liked my husband’s shoulder dear
He draped himself and lost all fear
Now the cats have all gone off
I am frightened by a cough
My husband comes to me at night
Fortunately he cannot bite
He touches me with tenderness
Smiles and wished me,God Bless.
When I waken I feel lost
So I have to wear a watch
I seem to have no solid self
I feel nervous of an elf
I don’t mind an angel sweet
He could rub my aching feet
I will have no other man
They are frightened of women
They don’t like to lose at Chess
They don’t like to wash my dress
They will brush my winter coat
Never ask me what I wrote
I do not wish to anger men
They might shout and bawl again
I think maybe I will turn gay
Ask a lady, what to say?
They may not understand my needs
Killing flowers to help the weeds
Talking all the weary night
On the whole they’re parasites
Also they may menstruate
I can’t give them seeds to take
So they will leave and get a man
This is where it all began
Eve and Adam,God and man
Cain and Abel, apple flan
Noah and his Ark so fine
I wish I had one in the rain
I wonder when the world will end?
I am old so be my friend
Awesome now means medium at best
Rubbish is just something we don’t need
Or something not worth mending we believe
Where nonsense may be foolish talk or jest
Or English humour at its lethal best
There is no Judge, it’s people who decide
Whether it is nonsense to deride
The message of the media online
Which like the Consecration, is divine
Awesome now means medium at best
That is, you have barely passed the test
What a lot of stupid people say
Appears on someone’s T shirt the same day
Nonsense can give pleasure,make us loose
Sometimes it can make us feel confused.
What is nonsense in the modern age?
To write nonsense one must think it first
Then translate thought into a little verse
But what is nonsense in the modern age?
The more I hear, the more I feel enraged.
Yet Lewis Carrol made a lot of notes
Jabberwocky is a poem he wrote
Where time was always brillig in his day
And mimsy was the passion for the stray
And Alice went behind a looking glass
She got trapped and missed the IT class
When she saw the minus and the plus
She said, Oh, my,I thought it merely glass
Mirrors are a vital need we have
Especially when we lead a dog to bath
Lacan and Winnicott each state
The mother’s face will mirror and emote
So if your mood swings are too much
It never helps to go inside a church
Try a little dose of opprobrium
The shock is less if you have got a chum
I wonder why the head is so attacked
Electric shocks, brain surgery from quacks
When massage with essential oil of rose
Curies hysteria and warms the running nose?
I hate the doctors and their ignorance
I really ought to learn to love a dance
For it’s the entire body that needs aid
It is for this that many people prayed
What is nonsense but a better world
Where babies laugh and little girls have curls?
What nonsense
Writing nonsense is extremely hard
Writing rubbish verses can annoy
Nonsense has some style, some meaning too
Gyre and gimble till the spies find you
Read aloud it makes me laugh and cry
Borogroves are woods where mancipes die
Wabe is like the sea, its rappling gorm
Please put your wrong name upon a form
Why not stroke A Rest for Oxford now
Lie down in a stunt without a cow
The rivers bring down water from the hills
Why God put the springs there, we can’t tell
Read a little Alice for your heart
Through the mirror is the wiser part
I don’t like the odour of your shoes
I am good and you are evil now
I decide and you must just agree
I am your superior and how!
I must be the bull and you are cows
You are blind but I can truly see
I am good and you are evil now
By good fortune, I am well endowed
I make better cakes and better tea
I am your superior and how!
I don’t like the odour of your shoes
All I meet will certainly agree
I shine bright and you are duller now
I know that God himself was born anew
I will learn his language for a fee
I feel so superior in the pew
I am the python in the apple tree
The adder shedding skin, the perjury
I am good but boring too I know
Where are the shades, the LSD,the glow?
Cured in hell
My doctor diagnosed me so well
The pharmacist sent me to Hell
The heat cured my joints
Despite devilish taunts
So we’re off for a weekend in Rhyl
The doctor has grown a new beard
He looks more mature than we feared
He asks pointed questions
And then makes suggestions
I feel that my pain is less here
Why do we need doctors today
Is it insufficient to pray?
I don’t fancy radiation
How about recreation
Just do it and noone will pay
Like children
We once rolled like children down a slope
We stopped the car to climb the grassy bank
As if we were reliving some lost hope
Ecstasy is way beyond my scope
My mind is always veering to the blanks
We once rolled our children down a slope
We laughed and laughed till our ribs nearly broke
The grass was wet and soon so were our flanks
As if we were reviving some lost joke
Back to childhood then we grew and wrote
Mainly to our others to give thanks
We once rolled joy’s children down a slope
From a bridge, we dropped the paper boats
The Lea is pretty ghastly, never punk
In the eighties Ted Hughes told a joke
Crow or wolf or magpie, what a hunk
Waiting for a vision, hit, distinct
We sold books in moonshine to the Pope
Feeling wild, enchanted by new hope
All I do for IPSO Mori
Someone rang me last week saying they were from IPSO Mori
They are doing a survey.They want me to write down everything I do for either a week or a month
I wonder what they mean by “everything”
I was offered £40 in vouchers.So if I stop writing you will understand
Who would tell strangers everything they did?
I thought it was for some TV company re which programmes I watch.I could hardly believe they expected me to tell them all I do
7 am Went to the lav
Fell over my feet
Brushed my hair
8 am Scratched my back and had a cup of tea.That was hard
Had more tea and weetabix.Wondered why I washed up
9 am Decided to get up, wondered what to wear
9.30 Daydreamed
10 am Got up, got washed and got dresses.Order is vital
10.30 Felt like emigrating but instead gave a lecture on algebraic topology
11.30 am Felt like a pee again.Wet myself.
Changed my clothes and washed them
11,40 Breathed and breathed again until full of air
Didn’t like my outfit
12 noon Looked out of the window and wondered if I need a new TV
12,30 pm Went to library and stole 3 books
1 pm Wondered if I could open the sherry bottle with a cheese grater
Ate a raw carrot on toast and got diarrhea
2 pm Had some tinned soup from the tin to save energy
Fried my bread in olive oil
3 pm Wrote s story
4 pm Had a fit of laughter and saw the black cat
6 pm It went dark and I forgot to put the bin out
7 p,m Ate some frozen curry with a knife
8 pm Ate a chocolate biscuit soaked in wine
9 pm Washed my hair with Fairy Snow
10 pm Washed up again
11 pm Went to Tesco’s again then came home
12 midnight Went out on my broomstick
1 am Fell into a holly tree
2 am Rang 999
3 am Was locked in cell with a policeman
4 am Released on bail pending psychiatric exam
5 am Went to bed with the cat
6 am Dreamed about my Jewish boyfriend
7 am Woke up
8 am Decided not to do this poll
What it seemed to be
Mourning has broken
Imbibe with me
E bay in a manger.
Type to say Goodbye
O come all ye wrathful/awful
They sent baiting for our partitions
Guardian angels, Telegraph demons
All on an apron even.
Enhance me with the sense of love.
So long,carry on
The tipsy wife.
Alexandra heaving
Three wise men…. send them here
Idolatry is love
Go spell it to the Pope
Ye olde limerick
I once like to make apple tarts
I was never much good throwing darts
To add some confusion
I had a delusion
That life can be lived as an Art
I like making quiche while at home
The smell of the pastry is warm
I saw a small ghost
Steal my hot toast
Then he left, he went over to Rome
My husband would pray in the night
Until dawn came with its gentle light
He liked my strange fiction
Without contradiction
I wish he were still in my sight
I miss his dear face and his smile
He knew that I had little guile
How will you manage
He died feeling anguish
The Devil was let out on bail
Where is paranoia on my sat nav?

Why have you not got schizophrenia?
Because it wasn’t on the shopping list
Why the panic?
No, it’s a punnet
I want some nutter
Do you mean butter?’
When I say nutter I mean it
Do stop knattering
What is a declension?
All I know is you can’t eat it
What is the plural of yoga?
Yogae
You broke the Law
Divide and conquer
Where is Latin?
It’s under “Tongues”
Tongues of Fire?
Sacrilege is bad for you
I’m a demoness
That is not PC
I’ll take the WC instead.
You can’t take it all with you
I’ll just take the cistern
Do you think that is funny?
No, but this is
How is this?

An unusual image by Mike Flemming 2020 Copyright
I have got more and more incontinent.
Do stop admiring Europe
Why do the government tell us to eat more fruit and veg?
To help evacuate the Common Market from our bodies
Why do the government not have enough beds in hospitals?
They can’t all go to sleep at once
Why are the politicians so stupid?
Because we are.
I am still incontinent
Don’t worry, only another week in the EU
I’ll apply for an Irish passport
You’re not Irish
No, but my parents were
I will miss the Spanish omelettes
But you never go there
I will not miss Mass on Sundays.
I will become an atheist and worship myself for an hour.Much more satisfying.
I wonder how Enlightened we are.
Well, the light is not the problem.It’s the vision.
I saw the Light once
Say hello from me.
God is love
So is real love God?
Can we go on the Trans Siberian Express
Only if you are Trans
But how do they know?
Wear a T shirt with Trans on the front
That won’t be very warm in Siberia
We all have to suffer for our beliefs.
It’s not a belief
What, you don’t believe you are trans?
I believe everything.
You’d better be careful.Some people tell lies
Really? I’d never have guessed
You must be stupid
How rude.
I am very stupid at relating to people
That’s honest.But don’t tell anyone
But they’ll know after I’ve insulted them again and again
Just smile and keep quiet.
Smile
A million kindle fires
Do you think my house should be rewired?
Should I enlarge my kitchen,go for broke
I have got a hundred kindle fires
I wonder why I cannot be a liar
I have got less faith but still I hope
Do you think my brain should be rewired?
Can I rent a mind for thirty hours?
I ‘d love to go to Chester in a boat
I have got a hundred kindle fires
Am I misusing love and with it power?
Where did Charley hide inside an oak
Do you think my tongue should be retired?
Many minds have like the milk gone sour
All they do is send me bytes, not talk
I have got a hundred kindle fires
Why do all the British fight or mope?
They must have washed their mouths with Fairy Soap
Do you think the world should be rewired?
We have got a billion kindle fires
In the slutch
My mauve silk trousers fell off in the slutch
I ‘d read the fashion page on Friday night
Whatever did they mean, do bring the pitch?
In heels my entire body seems to lurch
My mother often muttered, what a sight
My mauve silk trousers spluttered in the slutch
A clutch of eggs . a handbag, butter Dutch
My coat was yellow since that yolky night
Whatever did they mean, we wring in Church
Slutch is kind of mud that’s damp and rich
In Lancashire, we fall in it when tight
My mauve silk trousers wasted by the slutch
My hem is down and I’ve no-one to stitch
Am I here for love or to be right?
Whatever did they dream about our hunch?
I read the fashion page;I saw the light
Turn it off. I don’t feel I am bright
My mauve silk trousers ruined in the slutch
I had to wear pyjamas in the Church
Oh, good Lord, don’t let me be your prey
I forget that I am old until I’m out
Walking like a cripple in a drought
People tell me,dial 999
I don’t want to be so well defined
Getting off the bus, five people call
Wait until he stops or you will fall
Am I looking worse than yesterday?
Oh, good Lord, don’t let me be your prey
I sit down on a wall, is that a crime?
Have I crossed a boundary or line?
The wooden benches all are gone away
The homeless used to sleep on them, they say
I sang Joan of Arc at the bus stop
In Lancashire they say, y’ alright cock?
Cock and darling,honey and my sweet
My lovely, you are looking a real treat
I forgot to keep accounts and say my prayers
I guess I’m fending off some kind of dare
Where’s my handbag, where’s my bloody phone?
It’s acting adolescent as it roams
When I take naproxen, it won’t work
Opium is dangerous with some luck
I lie in bed and see the sun pour in
Then I know that life will always win
It’s wyrd


I’m a loud speaker
Are you really? I’m a gramophone needle
Can you speak?
If I couldn’t I wouldn’t be able to answer
Your clothes are very loud
No, your eyes are too sharp
Can you turn up my hem?
That’s a change from looking at your etchings
Where is the button off my shirt?
It can’t speak or phone
Is public speaking easy?
Nothing public is easy.
Even silence.
What is the agenda?
We didn’t do Greek at my school.
Why is weird right? Should it not be wierd?
It used to be wyrd before the Normans
That’s a relief
Where is my hat?
It’s learning tricks.
.
Where is my cashmere jumper?
Inside a lot of moths
Where is the frying pan?
In the fire
Where is the clothes horse?
Naked in a meadow.
Where is my mug?
It’s been shot
Why do you answer like that?
I’m a robot
I can’t believe it
What will you believe?
I don’t know…
That toast is Jesus?
How horrible
But do you believe it?
I’m godsnacked
See.
And died in peace
My husband was a very selfish man
He gave me polish in a brand new tin
That was for the furniture not for me
Well some may lose yet others might well win
He thought that I was programmed by my genes
To bake him cakes and polish wood and brass
To cook lamb chops and boil potatoes new
I said we did not learn that in the maths class
Then he grew enraged that I was bright
He told me off for playing Chess with men
He told me off for reading Wittgenstein
What could I do but drink all of his gin?
He complained I knew the villains in a film
My brain was far to fine to make me dear
Perhaps I was a witch in angel’s clothes
Drinking tea like others might drink beer
After he’d unloaded all his grief
He thanked me for my love and he died in peace
The fashion page
What to wear in winter,
What to wear in Fall
What to pay your bills with
Money talk appals
If you read the Guardian
They keep you up to date
One page is genocide
Next how to find a mate
Seems a denim jacket
Lined in wool of sheep
Will be ideal clothing
For those we love to meet
Standing at the bus stop
I feel very cold
Seems they do not think about
The poor folk and the old
Of course it’s for the adverts
Not for real life
Not for poor dear husbands
Nor even poorer wives
Why if we are human
Cannot we decide
What to wear in Winter
Not be taken for a ride
The Fire
The fire shot out its sparks like Catherine wheels
The coals were living creatures and red-faced
Now I’m angry,I know how they feel
We said night prayers with hearts like stainless steel
Said them fast as if prayer were a race
The fire shot out its sparks like Catherine wheels
My mind was wriggling like an angry eel
As if it sought for subjects to out-face
Now I’m angry,I know how that will feel
The outside stiff, the inner self revealed
The fury at the loss of love’s embrace
The fire shot out its sparks like Catherine wheels
We were raised to keep our wounds concealed
To show no affect, keep a stiffened face
Now I’m angry,I know how that feels
Never given love nor even praise
Is it a surprise we were ill graced?
The fire shot out its sparks like Catherine wheels
Anger made our hearts dance violent reels
Mary meets a man
I
I am doing research into which place people watch TV, the young man at the door told Mary
I rarely watch TV, Mary informed him
First please tell me your name and ethnic group .he asked her.We must follow the rules ,if not the rulers. he muttered
My name is Danish so I am a Viking, she told him proudly
OK, that makes you English, he said deftly filling his form
You might as well say that the Romans descendents are English, she said in her mellifluous voice
After 2,000 years I think they qualify, he joked
Some were black
I don’t care if they are purple, he said courteously.At some point those born here are English.
What we mean is that there is no such thing as being English,Mary said academically
So true, the poor man John whispered.I am a Celt.Not a cult. You seem a very nice lady.Would you like to go to McDonald’s with me? We could csrry on chatting
Do you mean come?
Come or go, give me an answer.do
I know it’s not where you usually go but I don’t earn much.
Yes,I’ll meet you at the bus stop at 5 pm, she answered.I don’t have a car
Neither do I, said John.
I like this bus.The people on it are really friendly
Mary shut the door and wondered what to wear
Annie appeared and tapped on her window with her manicured hands
You are just who I need,Mary cried with joy.
She explained her problem and her date
I think jeans and a nice anorak with a scarf that makes you look grotesque
Will John like that?
It’s the fashion,Annie said pertly.I am amazed you are going out with that man.You don’t
know who he is.He might be a murderer.
I doubt if a psychopath would take me for a burger… more likely a posh restaurant
Good point, said Annie brightly
Let’s look at my scarves,Mary said.How about this zebra print?
I like this blue one with books printed on it,said Annie
I could wear both of them!~
You could start a trend, her dear neighbour told her
Meanwhile Emile was having a panic attack in the kitchen
Don’t panic,Emile said Mary.You can’t linger in McDonalds
The seats are small and close together
Tell me, which scarf do you prefer?
I like that one with cat’s eyes on it.Wear that and he will know you have a protector.
Honestly, it’s too much bother to decide.If only women had fur like cats,Mary said
What about shoes? called Annie
I’ll wear the green trainers and red socks
You will be a sight for sore eyes if you add some makeup
On hearing this, Mary screamed hysterically.
I think I’ll stay at home
And so will all of us
New Blue
I wonder what’s the reason we call a sad mood blue
My fountain pen is coping but I have not got the glue
I see your eye is staring and I know it is a clue
Send me to the theatre and I will get the cue
I wanted to get dressed today but I couldn’t find my shoe
I watched a film of cows on heat, all they say is moo
Would they change their attitude if I was still with you?
Take me to America. take me to the Zoo
I have got no appetite.I need someone new
The food is very boring, it’s made with UHU
You put it in the microwave and send a text or two
Blimey,I forgot it was a homemade real beef stew
Well, the moon is shining and Paul Robeson gleams in glee
I want the stars to play with me, they pray for very few
Test to end the weak


How any degrees are there in a right mangled triangle?
Is any parallelogram square?
Is a square a rectangle?
How many angles are there in an ellipse?
How many angels are there altogether?
Can a cube go flat?
Why was there only one snake in Eden?
How many apples did Eve use to make her pudding?
Did you ever get excited by quadratic equations?
Did Q E s want to be solved?
Do you feel equipped to follow my Log?
Why not do it yourself?
Why not have an uncivil partnership?
You saw it here first
What to “wear” in “January”
Having studied “What to wear in January” in the Guardian,I can only afford the woollen hat
So I shall
1 Wear a calf length woollen coat bought in 2005 in a Sale over whatever clothes
I have kept moths from eating
or
2 Wear a Gore Tex hooded and quilted parka from TK Maxx in 2007 for £49.99 with a pair of culottes…..pickled in vinegar.
3.Wear 10 wool vests under a coat “with a hint of wool” and my pyjamas
” with a hint “of ” cotton”
4 An old fleece dressing gown from the Independent with my husband’s socks and shoes.
5 Grow my hair and wear a throw or ten
Amber eyes
I brought home a kitten from a friend
So tiny yet so fierce he bit my hands
We could not find him when we came back home
He was tucked in with the sheet under the foam
We had no garden so we took him out
Wrapped in a wool cardigan,I think
He lay contented on my knee all day
Looking at the trees and coloured sky
When mature he roamed the night away
Sleeping in a rocking chair all day
Benjamin, we called him, was run down
In the rush hour by a speeding clown,
The amber eyes of Benjamin would glow
He gave us happiness,we loved him so
