Category: humor

Emile’s in ecstasiulation

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Oh,Emile got up, he yawned he stretched
It was  cat pandiculation
For cats get stiff and cats get  tense
But they won’t write  no dissertations
Emile called  to Stan and Stan got up
Pet manipulationion
Stan made tea and fed his  cat
Emile’s ecstasisulation
Mary came  and she saw  Stan
Oh,  a manifestation?
Are you real,she , called to him
What impertinentication!|
I like your cheek, her husband shouts
Show me  your appreciation
Where is that, his dear wife said
Does it dwell  under my apron?
Well,Leonard Cohen  has mentioned this 
I’m damned by my own veneration
Oh,Stan get up and  get  some gin
This is  pure excruciation
Calm down,Mary.I am back
This is a  mere notification
I have got  myself another man
What a pestification
Does he sleep by  you in bed at night
There may be  an evacuation
Don’t be rude, we both thought you had gone
I’ ll drown in my  own perspiration
I feel such shame at seeing these  men
It’s  torment and it’s  tribulation
The doctor told me you were  dead
Is it  conspirification?
Send  a code to my   android phone
That will  verify  my  restoration

Henne

Hennetwistle  has a railway stop
The name is Viking  now it’s usually spelled
Entwistle, where reservoirs fill up
Manchester wants  water , here it’s held

Too Thirlmere is an artificial lake
For tea in Manchester, those thirsty folk
How much more d’ye think that they will take?
Hamlets drowned, dull cypress trees that cloak

I once passed through Darwen on a train
On the way to Ilkley  with my aunt
No memory of bliss with me remains
Except the  flowers  so wild, their ghosts  still haunt

Yet nowhere else gives me the feel of home
This landscape is my body and my soul

Bacon well bred

 

boars on snow near trees
Photo by Arthur Smaal on Pexels.com

As I looked down the list of groceries I could buy online I saw this

Outdoor bred bacon

Well , stone the crows.I’ve never seen bacon on a farm or with cows in a meadow

Next, chili with rice
I’d  like some meat as well.After all it’s easy to cook quick rice and throw some chili powder over it.Even a few kidney beans would be better than nothing

  Macaroni cheese

Don’t buy ir

Cook some  quick macaroni and add grated cheese.And maybe some cream or butter

Why not start cooking again?

When shaped like a brick

How to be chic and elegant when shaped like a brick
How to be chic when shaped like a cricket.
How to be seductive yet decent.
How to lecture when you are not in the mood
How to dress for the Welsh Onion Ball.
How to look good when feeling itchy
How to find your temper and keep it.
How to unlock your inner Daemon.
How to vote when you don’t feel like making a cross.
How to get a new man in  from 30 minutes to  30 years
How to cook the dinner and be really trying.
How to write with your thumbnails
How to make quiche that men love and eat it all yourself
How to  become calmer than anyone else and then die

Mary and the choclate icecream

Woods embossed
Woods embossed by Katherine

So why are you eating that layered chocolate icecream,Mary ,asked Annie  her dear neighbour charmingly  attired in a light purple skirt and blue silk top with butterflies embroidered round the neckline and hips covered by a silk dressing gown
Well, it’s a rather a strange story;it all began when Sainsburys had no slots for delivery
That’s not very interesting,said Annie foolishly
It is to me, Mary muttered plaintively.I wondered if there was anywhere else to get milk and  bread delivered as my neighbours were not so keen to get my last prescription
Why, was it for heroin?  Annie teased her, her smiling face ruined by a  too pale foundation by Hercules of Paris and Dalmatia with crimson lipstick from Boots adorning her wrinkled lips.She looked  ready to star in Death in Venice
No it was for cystitis, Mary cried.Anyhow I went  on to Deliveroo  and they have a store that sells food from Marks and Spencers.Only a  limited range, of course
Mary’s oval face  flushed with a pink glow and her singular blue eyes flashed like imitation diamonds at sunset in Weston -super-Mare
In contrast she was wearing a heather tweed skirt and  jumper of pure new wool
And her green trainers and matching tights
But they had no milk so I  continued with them on to Morrisons who again have a small
of  food and drink 
In  half an hour they were at the door and  all was well
Then one word came to my mind
What was it, Annie asked her nervously, her fingers twisting her  newly washed her  into ringlets so fast it  looked as if she was destroying the roots
Eggs,Eggs! They had no eggs,Mary confided.
Have you none left?
Yes but Emile fell off the windowsill onto the work surface and crushed them all
Do  you  believe it was an accident? Cats  have been known to suck eggs,Annie whispered
Wow,I didn’t know that, Emile miaowed furtively
Stay away from my eggs,Mary scolded him.Lay your own.I wish I could 
So naturally I went to Deliveroo where the local Coop was selling  food
I got eggs,crumpets, marmalade and then I noticed they sold icecream.Chocolate icecream.
You never eat it.Annie  told her
But I like it, so I thought,I’ll just get one as it is Easter
Well, the man came to the door and I saw he had a very small bag
I took it and it said, “sorry, we have no eggs so we have sent 6 icecreams”
That is illogical ,said Annie.You can’t bake  icecream nor eat it boiled with toast
So then I thought I”ll either fly into a rage  or I will eat the icecream
Then tomorrow I will phone  them and say, those eggs you sent were off
I have been sick all night.I want a refund
This is not like you,Mary, her friend said.You don’t cheat and tell lies
Not up till now  but we have to change.Not just ethically but  also
we have to  curse and swear
Your  fecking eggs were off.
But Annie shouted: they will say
We don’t sell fecking eggs but we have pickled eggs
Then I will shout: pickle off cried Mary
That icecream  has made you psychotic,Mary.,Annie informed her
Am I schizophrenic? Mary asked softly
Not yet but  Emile might be if you carry on
I’ll make us some lovely PG Tips Tea, that will restore our sanity
And make some for all of us

New cliches

What I need are cliches, new and vague
The ghost has got it wrong with howling bones
Sniffing the police leaves them enraged

If I hurt you, I am wise not sage
Moss is useful in a mixing bowl
 I need  lots of cliches, new and vague

Let’s get married if we’re not engaged
I don’t have the tools to fetch in coal
Sniffing the police leaves them enraged

Paradox is  vital in our age
Politicians   toss out joints all rolled
 Send me cliches, new and  somewhat vague

When this is over  who will be in role?
The sun has got no hat on ,I it stole
 I need  more cliches, new and  quietly vague
Sniffing the police leaves  men enraged

The pleasure of Confession

Fritillaria-meleagris-2020

 

Pray Father,I jave no sins to confess.What is the most common sin you hear about?

Hurting the feelings of loved ones or strangers by projecting our ill will into them and

then attacking them.

How about adultery?

Is that a proposal?

You naughty  little animal!You know what I mean.Don’t tease me.I am sensitive but I’m ok.I sleep all night and sin all day.Is adultery common?

It is very common and shows poor taste ,so if you want to be less vulgar leave it out.

I am long past adultery now.I am too stiff for sexual athletics.Though with more

acupuncture,one never knows.Besides I am not married any more.

Surely there is something else wrong you  must have done recently? You are only human

To be honest,Father,I believe we are often blind to our faults and we would need to bring

some other people along here to say how we have treated them.And then we’d find out

our sins more easily from them.

Well,there is some truth in that but we only need a random sample of your sins.

One will be a metonym for the rest.

Is that the right word?

Well,if it’s not it’s near enough,my child.

I am older than you;you must know.

I am sorry to say that is not a sin,my dear lady.Try harder.

I suffer from scruples…………… is that bad.?

Very bad.What are they about?

Doubts.

Give them up.Believe  you did your best.

How can I be sure?

Well, we are never sure of anything in this life but we it will kill us to  brood all day

Well, it does sound selfish when you put it like that

Now, drop  that heavy bag of  worries and run about the garden 

I can’t run but I will  have more fun

Now you’ve got it, my child.

Thank you and good night

Stuff a sprout

If  stuffed cabbage is too much
Stuff a sprout, from Brussels  lurched
A joint of beef is excess now
Try a calf’s foot  not a cow’s
Try a sausage  stewed in milk
If it spills we shall not wilt
Roast potatoes make some mad
Grill tinned peaches, they’re not bad
Try a carrot for a lark
Eat  it when your mood is dark
Make a salad, apple, nuts
Celery must face the cuts
Walnuts  come in bags not shells
Just as oil comes  out of wells
Why not ask a guest if blue?
I  can’t eat enough for two!

 

Food for the desperate yet creative person

This should pass the time for a bored person who needs a challeng
e
Brussels sprout Souffle
 
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An earthy souffle using Brussels sprouts and mozzarella cheese

https://recipeland.com/recipe/v/brussels-sprouts-souffle-33318

Who commands these viruses like flu?

 Who commands these viruses  like flu?
Consternation makes our hearts feel blue
Do we have a lifeboat or an Ark?
The situation does feel rather stark

Who  decided we could work while sick?
Our energy depleted , brains feel think
Decisions  so important  need clear minds
Not one both  unravelling and blind

We  travel  round the globe, a virus ride
Our garments are as louche as fratricide
We snap some photos of the Golden Dome
Then jump on a plane and turn to Rome

Why not stay in Britain  or in France?
The piper plays but  only demons dance

Ignite

If Boris Johnson  frequently told lies
This is very common  nowadays
No-one sane would be at all surprised

If  Boris Johnson could not breath ,so died 
Everyone for his soul might now pray
Though Boris Johnson  told some  dreadful lies

Even Peter , Jesus thrice denied
This was human, of such fears we’re prey
No-one sane would be at all surprised

If Boris was with women, he  was wry
But not enough to  stage one in his  play
Oh,Boris Johnson you should not have lied

   Oh Boris  has more children than his bride 
   Now he wants another though he’s grey   
   No-one sane admits they are surprised

I dreamed  of him last night,  he was so gay
To my surprise he charmed me  with love play
If Boris Johnson   lost his head and died
The  people would be frightened and ignite

 

 

 

 

A jellied eel is rarely served today

Smoke your fish in grandad’s polished pipe
Unless by accident you caught a pike
Foxes  tails are not a brush for hair
Without a tail, a fox will need repair

Herrings  caught in Whitby harbour glare
They may be dead but that is their affair
A jellied eel is rarely served today
If you eat one piece then  do not say

Bacon. ham and sausages despair
Moses said to eat them was unfair
Can we  reverse the  process we have used
And make some pigs, if only to amuse

Did smoking food  conceal the smell of death
The pig is  gone, it’s not holding its breath
Smoking pipes did not keep men alive
Some smoke in their grave. as I have spied

In the end  it’s  burial  or fire
The ashes of  the dead   are not for hire

I spurned my mother’s cheek.

Cercidiphyllum-japonicum_2020

 

I spurned the other cheek.
Adjourned  but never leaked
I  spurned  the other’s sheep
I turned the others weak
I learned  maths last week
I burned  like fire to meet
I earned his ire while bleak
I turned the gyre ,oh beak
The falcon cannot speak
My thinking is oblique
I’m spanking fit and neat
My husband’s  hands were sweeet
I churned, my   backside creaked.
Yeats wrote twice a week
Keats’ letters weep.
Was Mozart ‘s mother Greek?
Hebrew is our meat
Did angels  look so chic?
God must be unique.

I don’t like gravity either

SmTort_NGWales2013-2

Clue:take the first sentence literally

I feel for you
She’s my wife

I  am feeling Very Angry
Will  he let you?

I feel intense hatred for my wife
That’s very kind of you.It will  make her burden less

Should I marry or live in sin?
Both

I feel blue or I see red
Do you hear yellow?

I feel  very down
Is it better than goose down?
Well it feels better

I hate my brother
I bet he does too.

I  hate my untidy habits
How do they feel about this?

I don’t want to work nor rely on a man
Your grammar is excellent

I am getting tired  of hunting for new recipes
Where do you usually find them?

Shall I have a cheese sandwich or a bacon one?
Have you no eggs?

Shall I take a Master’s Degree or go round  the world?
I’ll be interested to see  that

I hate  shopping for clothes
How about stealing them?

Will I ever get better?
What do you think?

You said I would find love in the afternoon
Don’t  listen to me.

Are you a real therapist?
At last,progress

Have I got a virus as I fear?
No, you have  it as you are relaxed.

Shall I take the Oxford entrance?
No, leave it.

Shall I read Medicine?
No, swallow it

I do hate the way buttons fall off my coat
I don’t like gravity either

I  am afraid  of  topology
You are so  conceited

I hate it when my thoughts circulate
Well, you can feel what you like, they are yours

I wonder if I  can afford Freudian analysis
I do too

I hate clever  people
Don’t come any nearer

I hate Catholics
Don’t tell anyone

Is Boris Johnson English?
No, but neither is anyone else

Why am I here?
Don’t start that again.

Does it matter why we are here?
No, it matters how we are here

That we are here

The survival of the fattest

Being obese might be one way of surviving this plague.
Or as someone said to  a cancer sutvivor: At least you have lost weight or was   it ” at last”
You would lose weight after death if you kept turning over in your grave…
Jesus never mentioned  weight:Go thou and weigh no more.Double entendre.
Who invented the word “sin”  and why?
Weight is  like savings in the several banks.You can’t lose it all at  once
I thought I was flat once.It was because clothes are.Yet chair covers are not.
 Don’t know where, don’t know when,  we’ll meet and hoard our funny days

He won’t like  the crap you shed

I am frightened I’ll run out of food
My   insides are in knots that feel glued
I  feel sick tonight
What was I ate?
The cat’s looking mad  yet amused

The Whiska’s beef ‘s  meant for the cat
I trod on him, he is now flat
I stole his dinner
I am a great sinner
I should eat  both the snake and the bat

This epidemic is my fault, you see
I gave away bat food for free
The homeless have soup
And suffer from croup
The rich  folk denounce liberty

A huge sense of guilt is conceit
In a sense it is also deceit
We’re not omnipotent
Nor are we impotent
We’re in the grey, be discreet

I wonder  what new world we’ll get
When Boris  in aspic is set
He’s having a  baby
It happens  now daily
It’s the mother who’s caught in his net

Fancy  a nappy change now?
Boris  is taking a bow
He won’t like  the crap you shed
When you are in his bed
Well, it’s far too late after the plough

I eat cartoons for breakfast with a knife

I  lack the skill of mimicking   a cat
Mimesis  makes me copy  acrobats
I cannot do the crossword in the Times
If I’m free, I marry many  rhymes

A cartoon left me cold,I needed words
I preferred  to talk except to  birds
But now I reach the higher slopes of life
I eat cartoons for breakfast with a knife

In mathematics we use little signs
The science of pattern  circles all my lines
We learn to write  what others knew by craft,
The hand precedes the brain, the warp, the weft

The Scribes were groups  who wrote what others said
Scroll by scroll the Hebrew Bible’s read

Behind the canteen

Photo by Andre David Manjon Escobar on Pexels.com

Emile woke  Mary up at 7am.It was a  Sunday in  late October, grey and damp though the sun was still not  too low in the sky
Go away, she told him.The clock has changed.It’s not 8 am yet.I have to wash my hair as well.Get the Observer out of the basket for me,please.
I can’t read. the dear animal replied.And why don’t you rebel and stick to Summer Time?
I know Stan wanted to send you to Eton but we couldn’t afford it.Yet you understand days and calenders, Mary joked  sorrowfully
She got up and found her fleece dressing gown; it was   conker brown covered in coloured spots.She went downstairs and gave Emile a Whitby kipper.Then she made some tea and took it upstairs so she could drink it while she came round from her dreams
Suddenly Annie ran into   her bedroom wearing a  long black vinyl coat and  red knee-high boots
You never locked the back door, she howled like a lost  leopard which has had no  food for weeks
I don’t suppose anyone wants my old TV as it is only 19 inches.And my Chromebook is not something worth re-selling.I do have a new coat.
How about Ray Monk’s life of Wittgenstein, Annie asked her defiantly, her apricot lips pouting childishly as the Riemann of Paris lipstick glittered uncannily like an imaginary number in a dream of Godel.
The people who might enjoy reading it are by virtue of that , not the sort to steal or buy it on the black market.
That is very racist, Annie told her.You should say:the beige market!
Then nobody would know what I meant, Mary said lovingly
Anyway, do you want to come to Marks with me? They have some beautiful coats in
I’d like a pink wool coat, said Mary thoughtfully
Quite right  ,said Annie.Bring back feminine colours
Actually, gay men might like pink coats, she continued.But if they go on the bus they might get dirty.Come to think of it, so will women’s coats
They will have to buy pink puffa jackets and we can wash them at 30 deg.Mary whispered
Using a special detergent, Annie asked?
I have never seen a detergent for washing gay men.I don’t think they will fit into the washing machine.On the other hand, you are small so you will fit in
Shall I get undressed first, Annie asked furtively.
Yes, I’ll try to put you on a  short wash for 15 minutes but it is your choice.Maybe a bath would be safer?
No problem, said Annie intellectually.Are you having one with me?
You’d better be careful, Mary ad-libbed.It might be sexual harassment.
Well, I am not gay , said Annie.
You never know till you try, Mary giggled ,like a child behind the school canteen
Why, we might become gender fluid and then who knows?
And so say all of us
Miaow

Never get engaged on a whim

How to get rid of your lover
Tell them you’re carrying a germ
Spray Dettol around your home
Put deodorant on your  comb
Ask if they wash all their sperm

Nobody likes a rejection
But sometimes it’s better to leave
Be polite  as your part from them
After all they’re gentlemen
No need to make men aggrieved

Would your prefer an arranged marriage?
My doctor says it worked for him
Remember you’re ugly
Though very snugly
Never get engaged on a whim

 

Take your mind off

If you live near a psychopath
And can’t run
Then it will take your mind
Off the coronavirus

And if you have a UTI
You will want to die
Don’t kill him  yet

Strange how a bodily pain
Feels like torture
Like houses  had faces
And pictures of the  three bears
Hung in your lounge
Suddenly when you were five
Turned into a bridge with  three arches
Over a river

We truly believe
Then it  goes.
The eyes are windows
The mouth is a door
There never was  nose
At least we never  heard it sneeze
It  didn’t cough
Sometimes the chimney set on fire
But girls didn’t put it out

I get drunk without a single drink

I did not  know my mind was strong a sin
My wickedness was choosing to be thin
My ringlets  seemed  far wilder than cats’ screams
The torture and the vividness of dreams

I picked up books and read them in an hour
How could I guess  the wreckage of men’s power?
I made pastry, I baked cakes of wheat
To honour God , my father, the elite.

In my pram I gave the neighbours shocks
Electric was my verbal skill and luck
They asked me how to vote and who should win
I sucked my dummy as my thoughts all ran

 I  sit and listen by the kitchen sink
For I get drunk without a single drink

Over burned spaghetti and red wine

God has made men suffer making me
As beautiful as morning by the sea
Because I’m only interested in maths
I have long since left the garden path

I never look in mirrors  or deep ponds
Narcissus eat your heart out in ferns’ fronds
I  never used to wonder how I looked
When my eyes were glued on a textbook

What irony that men would love me so
I   thought myopia  would  make them shy
I thought they’d like to talk  of Wittgenstein
Over burned spaghetti and  red wine

But now I’ve learned how beautiful I looked
Lying on the sofa with a book
Alas it is too late for any more
I see the edge of Heaven by the door

God  may seem ironic, it’s a test
I may kiss you once if you insist

Meet your curse

How to manage your boss
How to damage your boss
How to savage your boss
How to banish your boss
How to seek for work
How to leak your worth
How to streak and worse
How to meet  your curse
How to beat  the curse
How to  bleat and shirk
How to write poetry and verse
How to import  forty whores
How to  survive jail and more
How to revive your faith when sore
How to stop selling slaves at the door
How to write a life sentence
How   to fight Evil and its allure
How to live well and be pure
How to  fib and sell cures
How to tell lies and  far more
How to differentiate the truth of calculus from quantu, mechanics
How to integrate panic
How to disintegrate with good manners
How to shorten your nerves [ my nerves are twice the normal size]
How to knit coats for bad nerves
Unnerving for swimmers in  life’s sea
Knit yourself well
Cat is my name, what the hell?

I dreamed I rode a tricycle last night

I dreamed I rode a tricycle  last night
Large and painted blue without  a bell
Then I met my doctor,what a sight

He told me he had lately seen the light
And wished to be a monk inside a cell
I dreamed I rode a tricycle  last night 

Ted Hughes had gone out fishing for a pike
The army in my head was doing drill
Then I met my doctor,what a sight

I see the almond  blossom, what delight
My sister thinks I’ve left her in my Will
I dreamed I rode a tricycle  last night 

Yet I am weary with my oversight
I am rarely mad enough to kill
Unless I met a doctor  out on strike

Because of such a strike I lost my sight
The Eye emergency  was  left too late
They say  that if I sue I’ll feel a chill
Surgeons  with knives on my window sill

 

 

Eternal love and hate

Everyone wants to be normal
But nobody knows what it is
It must be ouside of us
Or we’d feel what it was
So is it that we are all God?

Why do we want to be normal
Instead of being ourself?
We want acceptance
For sure and not by chance
Not to mention we all want  more wealth

Maybe there is nobody normal
The median, the mean or the mode
We all need to deviate
From  eternal love and hate
See  here what the Greek Gods still owed

The King’s Head!

applewe

You’re looking well, the doctor said ironically as I stumbled into his office
Don’t mention it,I replied,It’all Greek to me
Are you drunk, he said solicitously
No and I am not a tart either,I lied truthfully
What a pity,I fancy an apple, he shared
Doctor, keep you voice down.The patients will think you are a pervert.
Well, one tart is as good as another to a dead man
Is that a trope or a simile?
What a pointed question.
But not disappointed?
Who was Adonis?
Mrs Thatcher’s husband  with a Lancashire accent
No, it DIS I am thinking of
You seem to be imitating a racist film
Fancy  that, without even knowing!
Well, you are a real doctor,I hope
No, but I am rational
I’m afraid you can be counted
But who could count an infinite set?
It’s in theory
That’s intellectuals for you.It can be done in  Theory.But where is Theory?
Where intellectuals hang out using their imaginations.
Well, blow me down
Why can’t you jump?
I can only do it in theory
Well, better get on with the surgery.Which head are we cutting off today?
The King’s Head!
Well, it is his turn now….how  will he take it?
Under his arm
Like a deodorant?
I can think of better alternatives
Not a pig’s head?
No, an apple in his mouth
See,apples again.Why not go to an Art Class and paint some?
Because  my wife won’t eat them painted
How will  she know?
Because I have no artist’s palate
Well, it’s never to late to grow your own
I have my own palate
How is that?
It’s like  a bed before beds were invented
How come?
It is a bag of straw
But nowadays  they don’t sell straw
In case it’s  china?
How can  one sleep on china?
Go to a Tea Service and ask the Vicar
Ooh, you are artful
You do look well today
Am I the doctor or not?
I don’t know Not
You know Nothing!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

When you’re lonely

img_20200128_105515Mary was feeling lonely on Sunday so she decided to go to the Urgent Care Centre in a cab.There were not  many people there but enough to give her  2 hours  in the Waiting Room.Having signed in ,by claiming to have a  UTI, she took off her red coat  bought  in 1992 in  a Sale, and opened her phone.What to read?

Hitler’s Downfall
Quick Cakes
A few novels by Margaret Drabble
Freud the Fraud
Sex  crimes in  therapy
The rise of Fascism in Europe
How to care for a husband
The Second Sex
Feminism and Sexual Orders
How to enjoy your body before it is too late
Differential operators and their followers

After 2 hours Mary went to the Unisex toilets.While inside she hear her name called
I’m in here, she shouted.
Take your time
She handed the kind doctor her sample which was very pale
He went out and came in again
You have a nasty infection, he said calmly
What shall I do?
We have some antibiotics here on Sundays.The pharmacy is shut
Thank goodness
He went to see what he could find and  handed her a box of pills
It wa nice to meet you doctor, thank you.No wonder I felt odd
Yes, it makes you feel confused and  less smart
Indeed.I  meant to  go to Church but came here by accident
How lucky
Mary went outside and  ordered a cab
Well, that was a blessing, she told herself until she saw Annie dressed in purple velvet running down the corridor followed by Emile on a bicycle
Well, that’s what I saw before I took those pills

No words

If we had no language,we’d be good
No communication but by sense
What devil conjured up the  demon word 
Made our dealings complex and intense?

No Tower of Babel, nothing but mud huts
Caressing,kissing,kicking,  real contact
Boxing,wrestling,killing the unjust
No law except the fist. no guilt.no wrack

No religion but  a sense of awe
The rising sun, the moon, the distant stars
Oh,bow before the Cedar and the Oak
Anything that is taller than we are

No  books, no news no media,no war
It makes me wonder what live words are for

The labour and the  hurt that life will cure

I found a pair of knickers on the chair
They must be mine,oh dear, that is bizarre
I did not take them off,I am quite sure
They make the entire room seem quite impure

Yet why are knickers   thought to  be like porn
When they adorn the  place where life is born?
If you  hung the washing out to dry
You might see an angel in the sky

Most of us traversed the  holy path
We suffered pain but hope it did not last
Mothers too have struggled and endured
The labour and the  hurt that life will cure

The simplest items, pretty, well designed
Tomorrow I shall hang them on the line