https://www.thetimes.com/article/0e1cd27b-cec9-4dd8-98a3-c7e89a08f46b?shareToken=d687d08eeeb5ec36410b50130df32dd9

Mary was looking at the carpet in the hall.

Look at this carpet,she said to Emile

I can see your paw

marks all over it

Yes I trod in some red paint that someone has spilled on the pavement.

I think I will have to get you some shoes said Mary but you can take them off when you go in the back garden.

Do you mean we’ll have to go to the shops to buy me some shoes said Emile hopefully

I don’t know. If I went to a toy shop they might have some dolls wearing plastic shoes.

I don’t want plastic shoes the cat responded angrily.

My feet need to be able to breathe

So you would like leather shoes will you Emile?

The only alternative seem to be Wellington boots.

But do they make Wellington boots small enough for cats?

I don’t know the cat said wisely

Well if you would only learn to read you could look on the computer yourself.

It goes against my wilder nature to learn to read.

Well Mary said do you believe that I have no wilder nature ?

I believe you did at one time but I haven’t seen much evidence of it recently

That’s because Stan is dead, she shouted.

That would not bother a cat,

Well you may not have noticed but I am not a cat. And if you’re so pretty and wild, love me love me do

Don’t be so ridiculous. I am too small to make love to you.

You could run up and down my spine with Algipan on your feet

I’d rather wear perfume on my feet and run up your bosom.

Naughty cat, bestiality is not allowed in Britain.

Well don’t tell anybody about it. It’s not real bestiality just running up your body with perfume on my feet.

Well it’s something that no human being could do without seriously injuring me.

So you see there could be an advantage to marrying the cat

Yes my love I do love you very much Emile but I would really like a man as well as you and maybe you could find a lady cat that you could marry then we can all live in this house together then you and your wife could have some kittens

I’ll have to see who the man is before I agree to that. He might not like cats.

Is that case I should tell him you are a dog.

And so say all of us.

Stan and the standard deviation

Stan was teaching social statistics to a group of elderly neighbours.Since he was 101 it gave much hope to them to see him demonstrating his prowess with various techniques on the overhead projector,.He was planning to do some logic and some philosophy too.Annie was sitting by the door so she could answer the bell if any paramedics turned up for tea or supper…
I’m not going to calculate the standard deviation he murmured.”I just want you to grasp the general purpose.”
“Deviations,they’re not normal are they?” enquired his neighbour Henry,an ex-English teacher.”So how can they be standard.It’s utterly confusing..”
“Are you thinking of deviants?” Stan enquired calmly yet nervously
”Certainly not,at my age I’m long past that!”
” Still it adds a bit of excitement to the class.” he thought silently
How do words in ordinary language relate to those in Statistics?”asked Henry kindly.
“They are just more precisely defined in statistics.To say someone is a deviant is a rather vague term.”
“No,it’s not!My neighbour is a deviant.He always dresses entirely in yellow.”
“Well,that must be hard to do.Certainly unusual.” Stan agreed boldly.
“But in another country that might be the norm.So it’s a matter of context.In statistics it’s more prosaic..There’s a formula.It’s totally independent of context.Have you ever wondered why so many mathematicians have a touch of Asperger’s syndrome?”
“No,it’s not something that meanders through my mind much”replied Henry wittily.
A shudder passed through the audience on hearing the word “formula“,which perhaps they considered something of a deviant word. Anything with letters and numbers mixed together is certainly not welcome in many people’s minds, along with their more unusual sexual tastes, desires and inclinations which were kept secret even from themselves in many cases.So Lacan appeared to think.As I am unable to understand his writing myself,I cannot be sure if he was right or even half right.
“Time for tea,” called Annie,hoping to divert their attention to the everyday realm of food and drink.She carried in a platter of mouse [mice?] sandwiches kindly donated by the local ambulance service and some iced Victoria sponges she and Stan had made the day before in her new naga oven.
“Just a quick word about next week.We’ll take a look at ratios and proportions and maybe see how that relates to the concept of rationality.”
“That sounds fun!” Annie called encouragingly
.Henry decided to act on a deviant desire and fell onto her lap
”Oh,dear!” she gasped loudly as the chair collapsed under her.
”Why can’t you be deviant at home?”
“My wife won’t let me!” He kindly answered.And it’s impossible truly.
“And look,” Stan continued,”we’ll have to ring 999.This chair is in fragments.I thought for one day we’d be able to avoid calling them out!”
“Well,life is not controllable.” said a quiet but fierce looking lady with sharp green eyes.”That’s what makes it tolerable“
She then greedily consumed a large piece of iced sponge cake .
“I can stand the thinking if the cake is good” she whispered to her shy friend Amy.
”That’s rather a feeble argument,”Amy retorted.”You can’t really compare cake and statistics.”
“I’ll compare anything I like!” the green-eyed woman snarled loudly.
“You do what you like but you must keep a sense of proportion!”As we all know….
“Now then,have you rung 999?” Stan queried of Annie.”Yes,here they are,and they’ ve got a stretcher for the chair!”
“Well,that’s certainly unusual,even deviant“,Stan thought anxiously to himself.
”Where do they get their funding? Is there a fund for distributing money to help chairs which are not normal?

October 28, 2019
Walking on the long white shore with you
The perfect sands, the sky and sea so blue
The rippling waves made patterns on our shoes
Oh,come back,sweetheart ,I can’t bear your loss

The church at Old Hunstanton has a pond
Ducks and geese were waiting for more food
The silence was enormous, like the sky
Interrupted by a wild bird’s cry

At Brancaster we nearly met our deaths
Cut off by a wave behind our backs
Young and green ,we knew no panic then
But now I feel it as I walk alone

Without my anchor I may float away
A little speck of dust in that wide bay

There’s being a lot of talk about the winter fuel allowance handout which used to be given to retired people in the UK

No it is only being given to Peter on pension credit which means that very few people will actually get get it and of course this will affect some people quite a lot

Although the state pension went up by 10% in April 2024 which is quite a large rise although it’s linked to inflation so it’s not as large as it might appear to be

No if you want to prove that some people are suffering badly because of losing the wind to feel alone and I’m sure it’s not difficult to find some cases within the guardian there was a case of a man cited who he had been living in London in comes to the accommodation and he decided to go and live in Devon

His pension per month was 1300 pounds. He was renting a bungalow which had quite a high rental and after we’ve been living there for a little while among the low rent was 1100 pounds per month leaving him with only 200 pounds a month for food and heating and all the other bills not to mention clothing.

Obviously he will miss the winter feud allowance but it’s only 200 pounds per year not per month or per week so 200 pounds let’s say if you get it for the winter six months that will be about 34 pounds a month which might just about paying some of your electricity bill.

But I don’t think this is a valid case because most people is pensions were 1300 pounds a month would not be paying 1,100 in rent or if they were they would have to move to something cheaper.

There are many people who may own their own houses and are not paying any rent at all and they will be perfectly able to live on such a low income if they were careful but it seems impossible for this month to live on it even if he got WFA.

I don’t know why they wou