Someone other guided me to act Deep inside my voice had been unlocked I sang the psalms and then a lullaby Not aware in thought that you would die.
I fed you with a teaspoon the mashed fish From a plate as good as one might wish Like a little child you tried your best You smiled at me and gazed like one who’s blessed
You sat up with a brighter face at last Then lay back and God knows all the rest
Oh, don’t go yet ,my darling,I am here The floor of heaven came down amidst my tears Made of sumptuous satin, gold,revered For a little moment it hung low Then it rose and took you in its glow I saw your soul like that of a wild bird Taken by the Power who spoke the Word
A sheet of tears fell down from my closed eyes It’s hard ,so hard when those you love must die
Mary got all dolled up in her new pink wool dress.She was going to visit her former neighbour Sally in her pleasan and friendly Care Home not far away
Which handbag will match this, she asked her tomcat Emile.She did love a bag of fine quality as did he.
Not a black one, he muttered
How about blue?
Yes cerulean blue is pretty.
Mary put her keys and money into the bag,
It is very large,but never mind
Emile thought, Now my chance has come.
He donned his denim jacket and got a clean Hanky
Then when Mary was powdering her nose he hid inside the gorgeous Enny bag
Powder puff £4 by Barks 2 Often
Buy bag in G bay for £5000
Mary put the bag on her
shoulder and went to the
bus stop
And so will all of us
Soon the bus arrived.She picked up her beautiful bag and almost fell over.It was very heavy.
I am getting old, she thought I can hardly lift my handbag Little did she suspect the truth That Emile was inside trembling in fear in case Mary should drop the bag off the bus.He weighed 5 kg without his fur,so he had been told by the Doctor.
The bus went off and soon they reached Naughty Hall with it’s lovely Cedar Tree and its rose gardens.They got off the bus and walked to Pewter Road where Sally was waiting for Mary.She did not know that Mary had this errant cat hiding in her bag
But she soon will
Mary rang the bell on the front door of Suffolk House.
Come in the receptionist cried.
I have come to visit Sally, Mary told her Is she still in Room 13?
No we call it 12a now because 13 is unlucky
For whom?
Well someone broke a tooth eating nuts in there.
That’s not bad luck.Its stupid to bite hard nuts when you are old
In the Guardian last week it said that old people could still enjoy sex They advise using sex toys.So why not food
But not to help one to eat nuts I guess!
Can’t tell you as I have never seen a sex toy.
We will ask Matron
Do you think she uses them?
God knows but it is not part of the job description.
Not yet
And so cry all of us.
Sally was happy to see Mary
What a pretty dress she shouted.
Thank you said Mary.
Oh, lord your handbag is shaking.Is there a bomb in it?
Who would bomb a Care Home?
A crazy old woman!
That would be stupid.
Oh dear, it’s moving .Oh, God.
The women froze.
The two women stared at the bag.
And so have all of us.
Then they heard a loud Miaow.
It’s a cat.A large one.
Now Emile what are you doing?
Can’t breathe.Let me out, mother.Quick
Are you the cat’s mother, asked Sally?
Not literally, Mary confessed.
She let Emile out and it was a lovely treat for Sally.She had not touched an animal since her husband died 6 years ago.
It seemed a good idea at the time.But the timing was wrong.Shakespeare was my boyfriend’s friend.To be honest he was a cat.So to preserve my modesty I slept with the cat and not the boyfriend.Just another natural disaster in every day life.
Still,a cat has eyes unlike a flea which is what I sleep with now;I know only because it bites me in the night!Possibly it was from the cat and became a multitude like my sins .which are mainly of omission.A few are cultivated and the rest grew like weeds.I feel such shame when I think of my life,sleeping with everything but a human being. Intimacy with moths does not contribute to literature or any other human undertaking and yet it saved a man from torment loving a woman with such a strange personality.So that is good.I also wrote a few plays
I don’t think I will masturbate in public but on Sweden,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,Did he wear a paper bag? Where did he wear it?Sex,lies and paper bags… it’s the silly season alright.
Soon it may be compulsory,but seriously………….. what is happening to Europe?
Last week we were offered a new kind of advice program here in the UK.Two people in a relationship would have sex inside a box in the studio and then come out and talk about it or their problems.I did not watch this.Then today I read in the paper that a new book has come out about Masters and Johnson the pioneers [?) of sex research in modern times.They began with prostitutes but this was insufficient so they used volunteers who masturbated or had intercourse in front of the cameras.But they were allowed to put a paper bag on their head for secrecy.
From these films much information was gathered about things like female orgasm and other mysteries.I believe they used couples too
However,will the sex life of people willing to have sex in a public room with paper bags on their heads really tell us much about the sex life of the average person.Some people might be impotent but get turned on by the paper bags!It took away the human element
How my heart sings 