How to beat anti-Semitism

  • rs-leonard-cohen-2c24a166-affc-4250-a4a5-a8fd0a52a730

    Leonard Cohen often wrote about dark subjects and emotions, but in conversation he was always witty and eloquent. On YouTube there is a clip of a CBC interview from the early 1960’s where the TV presenter asks the young, rising poet, “Did you ever think of changing your name? Leonard Cohen sounds so…common (read: Jewish).” He responded, “Yes, I am thinking of changing my name to September.” “Leonard September?” she asks. “No,” he replied, “September Cohen.” Laughing Lenny never missed a beat. He was a legend.

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Learning stats with Stanley

Stan was teaching social statistics to a group of elderly neighbors.Since he was 109 it gave them all hope to see him demonstrating his prowess with various techniques.He was planning to do some logic and philosophy too.
Annie   his mistress was sitting by the door so she could answer the bell if any paramedics turned up for tea.
“I’m not going to calculate  the standard deviations” he murmured.”I just want you to grasp the general purpose.”
“Deviations,they’re not normal are they?” enquired his neighbor “Henry,an ex-English teacher.”So how can they be standard? It’s confusing..”
“Are you thinking of deviants?” Stan enquired calmly yet firmly
”Certainly not,at my age .I’m a bit past that!””Still , it adds a bit of excitement to the class.” he thought.
How do words in ordinary language relate to those in Statistics?”asked Henry kindly
“They are just more precisely defined in statistics.To say someone is a deviant is a rather vague term.”
“No,it’s not!My neighbor is a deviant.He  dresses entirely in yellow.”
“Well,that must be hard to do.Certainly unusual.” Stan agreed boldly.
“But in another country that might be the norm.So it’s a matter of context.
In statistics, it’s more boring.There’s a formula.It’s totally independent of context.Have you ever wondered why so many mathematicians have more than a touch of Asperger’s syndrome?”

“No,it’s not something that wanders through my mind much”replied Henry
A shudder passed through the room at hearing the word “formula“, which perhaps they considered something of a deviant!Anything with letters and numbers mixed together is certainly not welcome in many people’s minds, along with their more unusual sexual tastes, desires ,and inclinations which were kept secret even from themselves in many cases.

“Time for tea.” called Annie,hoping to divert their attention.She carried in a platter of mouse sandwiches kindly donated by the local ambulance service and some iced Victoria sponge she and Stan had made the day before while Mary was giving a lecture on doughnuts and algebraic topology.
“Just a quick word about next week.We’ll take a look at ratios and proportions and maybe see how that relates to the concept of rationality.”
“That sounds fun!” Annie called encouragingly.Henry decided to act on a deviant desire and fell onto her lap.
”Oh,dear!” she gasped loudly as the chair collapsed under her.
”Why can’t you be deviant at home?”
“My wife won’t let me!” He kindlily answered.
“And look,” Stan continued,”we’ll have to ring 999.This chair is in fragments.I thought for one day we’d be able to avoid calling them out!”
“Well,life is not controllable.” said a quiet but fierce looking lady with sharp green eyes.
”That’s what makes it tolerable“
She then greedily consumed a large piece of iced cake .
“I can stand the thinking if the cake is good” she whispered to her shy friend Amy.
”That’s rather a feeble argument,”Amy retorted.”You can’t really compare cake and statistics.”
“I’ll compare anything I like!” the green-eyed woman snarled loudly.
“You do what you like but you must keep a sense of proportion!”
“Now then,have you rung 999?” Stan queried of Annie.”Yes,here they are,and they’ve got a stretcher for the chair!”
“Well,that’s certainly unusual,even deviant“,Stan thought anxiously to himself.
”Where do they get their funding? Is there a fund for distributing money to help chairs which are not fit for purpose?

Menu for dismay

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Music by Aaronson

 

 

Starters

Boiled heels in  asterisk jelly
Buttered onions on a bed of fetishes.
Savoured  hens’ eggs on avocado  mice

Mains
Smart chips in yoghurt  source with stake.
Vegetable madly.
Oeuf soubise with saffron dice.
Ham and rotator with funny ones and salad
Curried spawn with mash.
Dicken’s flurry with all the trimmings.
Beef hew with tamperings and jacket pie.

Puddings

Bavarian   vanilla scream
Leonine mousse
Fruit jelly with Carnation silk.
Fresh root.
Cheese and trinkets,
Blue cheese with Word.

 

What a word

 

  • Busy  for a a fee
    Lizzie is a she
  • Sired by a frog
    Wired to a blog
  • Lurking or lingering  by the  throne
  • What Jesus said
    What beats bread?
  • In the thorns of a dilemma
  • Designed as a bat
  • Defined by the cat
  • Feet like a curse
  • Eat and feel worse
  • Bleats like a herd
    Slits up my words
    Fit  for a nerd

Thanks for the surprise

IMG_0464.JPGAll our food is served on clean dates
We use only Sheffield  blameless stolen knives
I wash the tablecloths myself weekly in  the river and I have a bath too
I use fairies to wash up.Who dries? The air!
Minimum wage paid to all and sundry
Eat as much as you like and play for it.Free piano now
All tea towels boiled at Xmas.Drained by New Year.Dried in mid air
All the  food is fresh and so am I.. fresh out of money
Sausage  pie is made by turkeys.Suitable for kosher and non -pork eaters.
Come slave with me and be my glove.. oven glove needed now
Please be polite.We aim to tease.We aim to please.We aim to wheeze.
Thanks for your customs.We have ours.
Thanks for the exercise.
Thanks for the surprise.

My dreams and love, like dying sparks.

When first I saw your soulful face,
I wished to dwell in your  embrace.
I wished as well to clothe you in
The sacred images within.
To find a home for love without;
To fold my dreams all round about;
Your loving body and your face
Were covered in such joy and grace.
I found my dreams were cast aside;
The world of meaning denied life.
What seemed most precious now is fled
As I lie sleepless in my bed.
What is the world when unadorned
With all that in my heart I’ve formed?
There is no meaning I can trace.
As in a mother’s empty face.
On these grey rocks. my path is hard.
From paradise, my self is barred.
To struggle or to grief succumb,
When this dark day of mourning’s done?
Into His dazzling darkness dart
My dreams and love like dying sparks.
Into His Mystery so fair.
I’ll cast both hope and my despair.
Thus my dreams will be transformed
To show themselves in other forms.
What feels a loss may foretell growth.
On my hope,I’ll take an oath:
“That nothing in my life is waste;
That I have not for phantasms chased.
And you are human,as am I.
Let’s live again until we die”

Ads and vice

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Please do not stalk on the water.
Do not park on this water.
Do not alight on my daughter
Do not steal  another’s blunder
It was his walk which caught her
We ate the cloves and dishes.
Let she who is without a PIN  have the first groan
Love thy labourer as thyself.
Love my favour and thyself
I am a zealous Rod unending.
I found Freud was  a filing symbol for God.
A Gallic symbol was Joan of Arc
Do not rivet your neighbour’s wife..
Do not will harm.
Do not Will charm
Do not lust after Eustace
Do not rust on pussy’s collar

What is poetry?

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http://www.open.edu/openlearn/history-the-arts/culture/literature-and-creative-writing/literature/what-poetry/content-section-0

We have the Open University here and I find they have a lot of free courses.I think I will do one as we get into winter.There is a big range of topics/

The endurable tryst

Trial by life’s an undoable  tryst
Sad days of darkness must come to an end
Trial by life’s an endurable test

 
Send for the minister,send for the priest.
With her long pointed  nails ,she has  her garments  all  rent
Trial by life’s  unendurable  tryst

The priest is  no longer  either sacred or blessed.
The succession  has faltered with  bitter dissent
Trial by life’s an endurable  test

The  people must now to each other confess.
The Tabernacle’s  empty ,for who paid the rent?
Trial by life, who can endure such a   tryst?

 

We need to look into  our own hearts that curse.
We need to take shelter,though torn is the Tent
Trial by life’s an endurable   test.

 

Who  gives the verdict,which judge is not bent?
Who can decide whether we should assent?
Trial by life:what a  blow ,what a   fist.
Trial by life:  the unbearable  last

 

 

 

 

Get out

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“All too often women believe it is a sign of commitment, an expression of love, to endure unkindness or cruelty, to forgive and forget. In actuality, when we love rightly we know that the healthy, loving response to cruelty and abuse is putting ourselves out of harm’s way.”
― bell hooks, All About Love: New Visions

Who would Jesus deport?

 

 

dscf0004http://www.patheos.com/blogs/paperbacktheology/2016/11/who-would-jesus-deport-for-the-christian-immigration-isnt-about-politics-or-economics.html?utm_source=Newsletter&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=NL%20Best%20of%20Patheos&utm_content=390

Evening bits

I had nothing to wear so I wore my self out.Inside out
Always be polite as rudeness  often causes feudnesses.
Never allow anger to  make your offensiveness obvious
We’re all OK and so aren’t  they.
No black moods here.They will be persecuted
I can’t walk on water yet.
Cancer makes you patient.One second at a time.

St Peter tried to hawk the water.

WINTER LOVE BIRD

The virgin Mary assumed it was heaven.
Jesus had no socks.
St Paul had a fit on the   road  to Erasmus.
St Peter portrayed Christ thrice.
St Peter  tried to hawk the water.
St John  had a  Word to offer.
The Jews are God’s people  because they saw the  Burning Bush before we did.I only felt it.
Prophets were turned into profits by Economists.
The Pope is advised by a  neon Arc Angel.
Jesus had twelve friends on Facebook.The pages were called  the Epistles.
St Paul was  so prolific he sent letters whenever he fancied it.That was before privatisation of the Toil Mail,of course.
The Romans were good at conkers and watching lions eat people.
The Cirque du Trialle.
History is  what we can find on old documents and barcodes.
God wanted his son to die.It was  pre-Oedipus.They could not both louvre the same lady
And she said,may your thrill begin on earth as it does in heaven

Must we voice our plight?

The past is present  till we  listen right
We  did not  wish to hear the words that grieve.
The past is present, must we voice  our plight?

Some  bear burdens, others  wander light.
By strange anxieties, I have been besieged
The past is present  till we  listen right

Some are listeners,some have second sight.
Of my visions I have been bereaved
The past is present,  we must voice our plight

My voice once silent, tension made to bite
By present pain,  my grieving is obliged.
The past is present  till we  listen right

I suffer deeply; others think it slight
By images and words,  this sense’s derived
The past is present,  welcome it, invite

I pray my  tear ducts opening ends the blight
Response to pain can never be contrived
The past is present  till we  listen right

 

In the depths ,the tears will be received
From  this watering, new thoughts are conceived
The past is present in  wild dreams at  night
The past  lives till we  hear and see it right

Discover David Grossman

Leonard Cohen (1970's)
Leonard Cohen (1970’s)

 

https://www.ft.com/content/204efd0e-ace1-11e6-ba7d-76378e4fef24

Quote

The central question in David Grossman’s new novel could hardly be more topical: how much reality can we bear to face, and what do we do when facing it becomes unbearable? It is a question the award-winning Israeli novelist has been asking in diverse ways for more than 30 years in consistently fine, penetrating works. These include books for both children and adults and encompass an impressive range of forms, from non-fiction to short stories to full-length novels to, most recently, his 2011 genre-defying meditation on grief Falling Out of Time.

Poems:Rabbi Ben Ezra by Robert Browning

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https://www.poetryfoundation.org/poems-and-poets/poems/detail/43775

 

Rabbi Ben Ezra
Grow old along with me!
The best is yet to be,
The last of life, for which the first was made:
Our times are in His hand
Who saith “A whole I planned,
Youth shows but half; trust God: see all, nor be afraid!”
Not that, amassing flowers,
Youth sighed “Which rose make ours,
Which lily leave and then as best recall?”
Not that, admiring stars,
It yearned “Nor Jove, nor Mars;
Mine be some figured flame which blends, transcends them all!”
Not for such hopes and fears
Annulling youth’s brief years,
Do I remonstrate: folly wide the mark!
Rather I prize the doubt
Low kinds exist without,
Finished and finite clods, untroubled by a spark.

They are only coppers

2012-05-12 10.31.13-44

My friend told me if I wanted to get married again I should not tell the men I meet I was a mathematician.So I’ll have to stop saying :I am 5/8 Irish and 1/3 Anglo-Saxon and  1/48 Viking.
That doesn’t add up to one.
I never said I was an integer!
If you   give too much detail it puts them off.
How about  :I am 38-28-40?
Is that your Zip code?
No, it’s my vital statistics.
I should wait till you know them better.
When will that be?
After you get the diamond ring.And stop using numbers so much use words. Hang on:Hello, this is 07576339417.Hi.
That’s a funny phone number.
It  was the police.
How come they have your number?
I think it’s because  I told them you wanted to re-marry
Why tell the police, it’s not a crime.
I thought they might give you a job.
Why do I want a job?
To stop you getting married again.
But there are men in the police station.
You can’t marry them
Why not?
They are only coppers!

Poets and Writers

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https://www.pw.org/content/peter_orner_0

 

Posted 11.10.16

“I’ve always had a difficult time talking about writing. I’ve never really been able to say the phrase ‘my writing’ without feeling not only self-conscious but also a little bit ridiculous. A lot ridiculous. Even though I do, technically, teach creative writing (and I enjoy it because for me teaching creative writing is teaching literature, and I can never get enough literature) I’ve always had very little advice to give when it comes to how to actually sit down and do this. I mean if people truly want to sit and write something they will sit down and write something and nothing I say, or anyone else says, could ever make much of a difference. I have no tricks to trick anybody—including myself, God knows especially myself—into a chair and concentrate. And yet, and yet, don’t all roads lead to Chekhov? This morning I read a brief story called, ‘In Exile.’ It starts like this: ‘Old Semyon, nicknamed the Explainer, and a young Tartar whose name no one knew, sat on the bank near a bonfire…’ Goddamn, to start a story like this. One guy has two names, the other has none. And I didn’t feel inspired necessarily, but I did feel alive. Alive as if I was out there on the cold riverbank with those two. And I did get back to work, or at least tried to. Needless to say, the Explainer in the story isn’t the one who understands very much.”
—Peter Orner, author of Am I Alone Here? Notes on Living to Read and Reading to Live(Catapult, 2016)

The jokes for today

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1.A Christian,a Jew And a  Muslim were walking through the Mall  looking for a Coffee Shop.
They found  a new one  with lots of seats so they went inside and sat down.The Jew went over to the counter and asked,do you serve Cappuccinos?
The waitress answered,not usually, but in your case I’ll make an exception.
And my  two friends?
Are they Cappuccinos as well?
Well, they are people of the Book like me.
I’m sorry .I meant to give it back.Are you going to fine me?
No, give us free coffee and  we’ll say no more.
2.You know all those Coffee Shops staffed  by foreigners?
Yeah.
The Government is  going to build 7 meter high walls around them.
So America is going metric at last!
3.How can you tell I am a foreigner?
I’ll just shout.Wanna see a foreigner!
4.Why do we fear Arabs?
Because they invented al-gebra.
5.Why is the Pope a man?
We  just have to take his word for it.
6.My husband asked me,what is post-modernism?
I replied,you didn’t need to marry me  just to find that out
7.My wife asked,why do my rock buns fly away?
I said, because I am trying to kill that spider on the ceiling.
8.My son asked me to lend him my car for a week.
I said,it’s alright son, you can neck  here at home.
What about my Oedipal conflicts?
Use PayPal instead.
9.My daughter has got  big blue eyes.
Where did she get those from?
Her  grandmother.
Is  she dead?
Not yet but Jesus wants her  whole heart.
Don’t tell me he does transplants now!
10.I want to  go to the lavatory.
They have closed all the public ones.
I should think so.Who wants to be watched all the time?
You’ll have to go in the telephone box.
I only have a Nokia 105.
Didn’t I tell you to get a phablet?
I’m not smart enough to spell that!

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