When Mary woke up she could see the sun shining through the curtains. How lucky, it was going to be another bright day. She lay in bed trying to decide what to do. then she remembered that she could not go out because she was waiting for the pharmacy to deliver her medication.
Owing to the cutbacks in the NHS the pharmacy was struggling to cope with all the prescriptions received especially from the older folk of Knittingham who have been put onto statins,calcium channel blockers, beta blockers, tranquilizers, antidepressants mini aspirin, warfarin and even anti-psychotic drugs because they did not believe Theresa May was a was a real living person and so were diagnosed with schizophrenia.
If Ronald Laing was here now he would be rolling in his grave because he said schizophrenia was caused by people being put into an intolerable situation within the family of origin or more likely within Society if we can still use the word.
Is Boris Johnson real? Michael Gove… he’s hardly looks human;you see if you do not agree with what the majority of people think then you are defined as mad.
This means that all the Jews in Germany and Austria and other countries in Eastern Europe were crazy in 1938 because they did not believe that Adolf Hitler was a good leader for Germany and indeed was a dangerous and evil human

And when they were taken to Concentration Camps and murdered or shot in their thousands by the advancing German army on its way to “defeat” the Soviet Union in 1941……….. were they out of their minds?
Who do you think was crazy then?
Who is crazy now?

Well, Mary thought this is not going to get me very far I better make myself a big mug full of hot tea so I can take my antibiotics.

I really wonder now if original sin is real or whether it is a society that is evil. Western societies have nuclear bombs, military forces and many such things. That must tell us something.

Mary was looking in her wardrobe trying to find something to wear. She picked out a skirt of many colours rather like Joseph’s coat would have been in the Bible. That didn’t do Joseph much good do it?. With that, she wore a blue acrylic jumper whose neck was too low so underneath she had to wear a purple camisole

My goodness, she thought it takes me half the morning just getting dressed; however did we manage to go to work years back?

Of course, when Mary was working she wore just jeans and a sweater.. She even wore underwear but nobody could see it except on one occasion when the zip on her trousers broke in the middle of a lecture.However, the students were very kind and none of them seemed to be looking at it. that was because her lectures were so fascinating that none of the students was looking at her as a woman despite the fact they could have seen her blue silk knickers poking out through the broken zip.

After that Mary realised that it was better to wear a very long sweater when out of the house. How kind her students had been

Downstairs she noticed that although she had vacuumed the carpet in the hall the day before it was still covered in little bits of paper and other tiny objects. I suppose you can’t have it clean all the time she murmured to her cat Emile
It’s not natural to be clean. Are forests clean, are woods clean, is the sea clean? I’d better think about the latter one she thought. after reading the news about the environment she knew there were different kinds of cleanliness

There was a kind of a harmonious dirtiness which fostered the growth of plants and seeds and then there was the inharmonious dirtiness of grass verges being covered in crisp packets and empty bottles of Coke and the inharmonious depths of the sea where plastic bags were waiting to kill the whales or the dolphins Yes it is rather difficult to define she decided.

In the kitchen, her cordless vacuum cleaner was waiting to be charged. Had it committed a crime. Of course not, it was waiting to be charged with electricity.

Through the glass door, she saw her friend Annie approaching slowly as she was wearing very high heeled shoes

Good grief Mary cried. I thought all the top people were wearing white trainers this year with designer clothes

Well, I am not, said Annie. I bought these shoes because I have got an invitation to have dinner with that psychotherapist who lives across the road

You haven’t mentioned him for a long time, smiled Mary but in any case, it’s not the time for dinner yet

No it’s not till tomorrow actually but I thought I would try these shoes out and see what I can get used to wearing them so it won’t look as if I’m making an effort to look especially good for him.

The shoes were shiny red patent leather with 5-inch heels.

What makes you think that he will like them, asked Mary tentatively

All men like these sort of shoes and Annie told her.

You can’t prove that. I don’t suppose that the native peoples of North America would have liked women to wear shoes like that

They probably did not even wear shoes at all : they had moccasins with soles, made from buffalo hides…

Well it’s different nowadays

Modern life has made men’s sexual desire disappear so we need to do things to bring it back again

Why, even teenagers have given up sex now!

I don’t think that psychotherapist is a teenager whispered Mary with a smile on her face.

You may be right

When he was growing up women would have been wearing stiletto heels. I had some myself until they got stuck in a groove in the pavement and I had to leave them behind.

That’s why I did mathematics at University. I wanted something more.

That’s ridiculous,replied Annie. I wore stiletto heels and have been married five times and I never wanted to go to university to read anything at all. Especially not physics, mathematics or engineering or difficult subjects like that.
I think it will be a big mistake for women to believe they can get married after they have read mathematics for 6 years at university.
Well I got married said Mary bluntly

You must be the exception to the rule as you are so stunningly lovely and not dominating at all.

Some men like a dominating woman, Mary kindly informed her.

Well, I’ve never met a man like that so far. her friend responded

Maybe you will

I wonder what that psychotherapist likes. Do you not think he will be married already

I don’t mind. I can be his mistress.

But wearing red patent leather shoes makes it all too obvious to the neighbours ; they will think that you are a tart

What, at my age?

There’s no tart like an old tart

That doesn’t mean anything said Annie nervously.

Not logically but it means something even if it’s only humorous. What kind of dress are you going to wear with this?

I got a dress from Dash last year it’s what they call a wrap dress it’s blue and quite demure but I would like you to see me in it to make sure it is not too tight. I hate a dress that is too tight on a woman

But not on a man, I suppose, Mary replied whimsically

I don’t mind what men wear. If they want to wear a wrap dress let them wear it especially in the summertime as these cotton dresses are very comfy in hot weather

But that’s not why you’re wearing one is it? You are wearing it because you think it will make you look sexually attractive

Well, it might make a man look sexually attractive too.

I suppose we don’t really know exactly what makes people look sexually attractive. But why don’t you want to be friends with this psychotherapist first and get to know him and to understand where he is coming from before you decide to wear provocative clothing. if he’s a Freudian he might think you’ve got hysteria

Oh no no, psychotherapists can’t decide something like that from one meeting

We should not rush to judgment.A woman might be wearing a wrap dress that clings to her curvaceous body because all her other clothes are in the washing machine

It would have to be a very big washing machine to put your clothes into it all at once

Don’t be snide it doesn’t suit your nature, Mary!.

Perhaps my nature will change now that I am a widow. perhaps I will say nasty things to people and steal you fruit from their Orchards

Will you start doing armed robbery asked her friend because if you do I would like to come with you

Do you really mean that, Mary asked

Yes of course I do. although I have no guns and I have no knives except the ones in the kitchen

Well they can be deadly. Marital violence has occurred where a long-suffering wife has killed the cruel husband with the carving knife when she was trying to cook the Sunday dinner and he was asking her to cut his toe nails

That’s true but I am thinking of robbing banks and they will not be cooking a Sunday dinner in there will they?

No ,they’re probably going to McDonald’s for their dinner

That’s alright then

I was just thinking of pretending to have a gun and staring at them brazenly

Give me your money I want £50,000

it’s no use, Mary. you look too kind and gentle to be convincing

In that case, I will have to start practicing looking nasty and aggressive

Please don’t do it to me Annie asked. it might bring out the demon in me

I didn’t know you had got a demon inside you said, Mary. has it got a name?

Not so far but I will think of one soon because I am going to buy it its own mobile phone

Why would a demon want a mobile phone? asked Mary

Don’t be so logical. not everything has a reason. I expect they like to look modern like you and I do

Well don’t spend a lot of money on it You can get a Nokia 1 unlocked for £79.99 on Amazon and then you have to buy a SIM card

I would have thought a SIN card will be most suitable for demons,.I shall go and put my new dress on and return here in a few minutes so that you can tell me what you think

Why Annie thinks that Mary is a good judge of clothing is a mystery to all of us as her main interest is in mending gadgets and studying philosophy while listening to Leonard Cohen singing The Future

And it is to all of us

Stan was in his front garden polishing the wheelie bins with lavender wax polish.
He was not very happy as the garden was only 10 feet by 12. so the huge wheelie bins ruined it.When he got to the third one the lid popped open and out jumped his next door neighbour “Adulterous Annie”.
Hello, Stan” she whispered.”Where’s Mary now ?”
“Why?” Stan muttered into the back of her neck which he licked as he like her salty taste.
“I was thinking, these bins are so big, we could both get inside one.It would make a change1!”.
”What a strange idea” he replied philosophically.however , age was no obstacle where love was involved. if you catch my drift.
Soon Stan and Anne were in the big green recycling bin.Stan being 81 had shrunk somewhat so he took up less space than Annie did.He allowed her to kiss his left eyelid.What a lovely feeling.
Alas, all too soon, as they say, they heard Mary’s bicycle bell.She was getting faster and faster.As she wheeled her bike up the 30-yard long front path to the porch she heard murmurings and mutters,
She lifted up the green plastic lid and saw the two lovers covered in cuttings from the privet hedge.
“What the bleedin’ hell are you doing in there?” she shouted mellifluously.
Well , it’s hard to explain,……………but Stan was wondering about a green funeral” Anne said mischievously.
“Funeral , my hat!” Mary said coldly.”Get out at once”
“Don’t speak to me like that” Stan beseeched her brazenly.
“Well ,it’s a shock to find your husband in the bin with another woman!”
“Wouldn’t it be more of a shock if he was in the bin with a man, or even a sheep?”
“Schmann or Schwommann, sheep,it’s immaterial.
“Hurry, get out, quickly before the school exit time.what will all the mums think as they go by?”
But poor Stan could not get out.He was stuck.Oh ,my! what an odd phrase.
“Have you got your mobile on you?”
“Yes, it’s here in my bag.
“You’d better call 999”
“What a brilliant idea!”
Soon, Dave, the paramedic arrived.
Mary showed him Stan’s situation.
Ever resourceful,Dave was not bothered though the NHS budget might be getting cut.
He tied some rope around Stan’s waist and between the three of them and Emile the cat and his friend Elizabeth, they managed to haul the poor man out.
Annie stood weeping with shame.Her silvery blue eyeshadow was beginning to run mixed with tears and black water soluble mascara from Chanel of Paris and London.
Her new coral lipstick from Clinique was not as non-allergenic as she hoped.Never mind, it gave her lips that bee stung look that many men admire.It reminded Stan of his boyhood days playing near High Force Waterfalls in upper Teesdale….
Teesdale ,still an undiscovered and undervalued part of England.
Contact the English Touring Board for more information. Holiday Loans available from Thwaites of Stockton and Darlington at only 1% interest.
Mary gave Annie a large Kleenex tissue,
”Come indoors,honey, and I’ll make you some Ceylon tea.It’s been the most thrilling event of my entire life and I’ve photographed you with my new Nokia camera phone
[Prices available on request from The Cat-phone Warehouse,Teesside ,Northern England, comes in pink and pink and…pink?How I love pink!]
I’m going to send some to the local paper.
Stan staggered upstairs covered in bits of privet ,lettuce and cabbage hearts, and carrot tops ,not to mention a few dozen banana skins and potato peelings.
What an afternoon.[Please contact the society for the care and protection of vegetables if you wish to make a complaint about this story.}
“That’s the last time I climb into a wheelie bin”, he thunked
“Next time we’ll use the cardboard and newspaper wheelie bin” he proclaimed to Emile.
Well, there;s no fool like an old fool,Emile miaowed
And so say all of us

A strange and lonely feeling held my heart
Gripping like some pincers made of steel.
From my beloved, I had had to part
The numbness folded round me like a wheel.

Quietness loved, has now turned into threat
Nero-like, I fiddle with my tunes
Pie Jesu’s not made top ten yet!
Larks’ ascents aren’t worth much to a loon.

I phoned a friend, her voice did me no good
It echoed in the chambers of my mind
Where metal walls torment the coursing blood
And escalate these feelings so unkind

Though he l loved has gone for he is dead.
I see his shadow on my artless bed

We Have a Creativity Problem https://www.nytimes.com/2022/04/16/science/creativity-implicit-bias.html?smid=nytcore-android-share