I always voted for  the Right to be a human parasite

The oven won’t light and the fridge won’t shut
To think I voted Democrat
The eggs went off and the bacon rhymed
The milkman got here just in time
The freezer is jammed and I need the peas
At least the cat ain’t got no fleas
I always voted for  the Right
To be a human parasite
But now we’ve got a crazy man
Where have I put my copper pan?
I lost the lids and burned the plates
I’m wondering how to  emigrate
But you can’t beat Satan  as he flies
To sites all numbered by his spies
I can’t make the dinner and my wife is ill
Should she stop those yellow pills?
I suppose I’d learn if I were young
I am 95 this Spring
I’m off to buy some ready meals
Otherwise it’s tins of gruel
I can’t make  puddings or even cakes
I fear I’ll make a bad mistake
Women know when they are born
How to put cream in a  horn
They know how to make a sausage roll
Down the hill into the Croal
From Spion Cop we saw it run
Faster than an horizon
Men can’t even grate the cheese
Yet they know just how to please.