Day: December 26, 2014

Dear John

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Dear John
I am in the doldrums and feel as if I am stuck for ever .So  to escspr I have bought a motor bike and am going to Cornwall for New Year.
Your dinner is on page 14.Remember it’s the Sabbath now so don’t fry bacon as the new neighbours might smell it.
That’s rhe one problem of being a British Jew…..there is no real alternative to egg and bacon as a British dish.However if pigs can be made into sliced bacon surely some clever person can cure lamb and make it into a similar thing..think about it… this could be your moment… we might get rich and live in a white house like my dream.
Still as I am also a Catholic and it’s Friday we ought to have had fish and chips…..I must hurry or you might come back and find me here writing this letter which would be a waste of my efforts to elude you and vanish into the frosty darkness with only Ludo the cat sitting on the back…. don’t worry I have bought him a crash helmet.
Somehow I can’t seem to escape as I recall I have not boiled your hankies this week nor have I killed the rat nor swept the mat..This really is the doldrums… I am stuck and waiting for someone to take this raucous blosh off my mind.
Sincerely
Your wife
Ruth
I hate to say this but you are very boring… and I can’t take any more.if only you could speak.I never know what you are thinking.Maybe it’s all for the best as you might be a serial killer.You nearly killed me with your sudden rages and bad temper if I did not breast feed you nightly….I suppose it kept me slim but it seems wrong when you have dentures.Can you not remove them so you don’t bite the hand that fed you,if you catch my drift.
So you will have to go back on the bottle… there’s a few left in the cellar.
That’s it for now… light a candle for me.

Falling

The man who never listened to the troubles of his wife

fell down the escalator at King's Cross station.

No-one met his eyes,

as he lay sickly on the concrete,

though someone did push his shiny briefcase towards him

as if hoping that was enough.

He phoned his wife but she was out

complaining about him to a neighbour instead

of painting or cooking dinner.

As he lay down there on a level with the feet

of the commuters

he noticed no-one polished their shoes anymore...

well,no-one could polish trainers of course..,

though you can wash them----

he saw the way people leaned forward as if pushing themselves

against a gale.

though it was a still warm day.

It seemed as if they were battling against a huge force,

not relating to the feeling of their weight upon the earth.

It was some spiritual force which was pushing them back

towards the Underground,hot and turgid with sweat and dust.

A sanitised Inferno,where the hell is in the collective mind
.

The force seemed to push them in and they pushed back and did

eventually make it into the street outside and into Westminster,

for we all need our rulers.

He lay there all morning musing, until a tramp came over

and asked him to buy a copy of the Big Issue.

And he stood up and bought it gratefully,

taking strength from the acknowledgement of his humanity.

He phoned the office, went home

and told his wife

he'd like to know how she had spent her morning

how she felt,how he wanted to learn to talk and listen,

and recommends now

that if you can fall off the escalator

without breaking a leg

you might be glad

to see life from the bottom up;

for he'd always looked from the top down

and was above everyone.

These reversals,though fearful,

can give us a new perspective

especially on women who are so often

on the underside of society

He's wondering about changing his life

from up to down..

and down to up.

Mothers always said,it's good to have a change.

I don't think it was their husbands they meant..

though.........who knows?

A game of musical chairs might be good

on the weekend,

if you live near a good escalator.

Escalating... it's not for the beginner

at falling.

	


	



			
				


			

			
Surveillance existed long before cameras , hacked computers etc
		
	
	

		












My home


What I mean is that we all live in a society and hence we cannot hide from other people.Now,the reason I am writing this hopefully humorous tale is because I often catch a bus from a bus stop 1/4 mile away which is outside a block of former council flats.I go there and so do some of my neighbours.One of them goes out each day because his wife is an over enthusiastic cleaner.I have known this man more than 30 years.

One morning I met an Indian lady at the bus stop.I realised I hae met her at a friend’s house so I greeted her.She replied,We often see you here with your husband.

That was a surprise as he hates shopping and rarely comes with me as in any case he has health issues.

After a bit more chat it was the man above she referred to.I did not realise she lived right by the bus stop….

I said,He’s not my husband.

Well,who is he then,they said almost as if they knew better than I did…..

So I said,He’s my boyfriend.

This caused them to colllapse with giggles and peals of laughter… was it my haggard face and my stick? or my confession of meeting him so near my home.

So now if I go to that bus stop I shall know they are watching me…..and take my boyfriend on a different route





	


	



			
				


			

			
My  boyfriend and other lies
		
	
	

		






ShadowSelf portrait

This boyfriend used to run a little restaurant.He does the shopping for his family and comes back on the same bus with me.He advises me and helps me by making me stay seated until the bus stops and he then persuades the driver to open the front door which is lower to dismount from than the back one.

One day there was an extremely fat man sitting in front of me.He was sticking out half way across the aisle so I was not surprised with no vision on that side when I bumped into him.He was furious so I apologised gently.When we got off my boyfriend told me if that happens again I must say,

You are very fortunate [ to be touched by me!!].

I don’t think I’ve been out since… owing to illness not the bumping into the man.So I miss my nice sweet boyfriend.I only see him on the bus or at the stop.