Unaccustomed as I am

To being the adjunct of a man,

I find it mostly beneficial

To give neat brandy to officials.

Unaccustomed is the game

Custom fittings fall like rain.

I dwell among the nuts and bolts

Look down here,you witless dolts!

I’m just a pair of kitchen pliers

Made for untwisting your wires.

Keep me in your bottom drawer

In case you need to see a lawyer.

This poem is a nonsense rhyme.

Please sign on the dotted line..

If you think my verse too short,

I shall make a wise retort.

I like Lewis Carroll best.

Do I pass the nonsense test?

Learn some number theory now.

And write it on your vessel’s prow.

Did you say your bedtime prayers.

Do you dress in woolly layers?

Will you dream of me tonight?

I’ll send you schemes in colours bright.