Mary was admiring the rowan tree outside her window when she saw Annie running down the street
Well Annie I didn’t know that you could still run so fast:why are you coming here in such a breathless state?
Oh it’s my New Year resolution: don’t you know that running is very good for you?
Wlell in theory that might be true but when you’re over 80 is it a good time to start?
I have no choice because I didn’t start when I was younger and time doesn’t go backwards.
Would you like some breakfast? I have some very nice bread here from the bakery and some lovely honey from Devon.
They at down at the kitchen table.
Where did you get your running shoes from, Mary asked her friend?
Oh I think they belonged to my husband. They were in the wardrobe and as I like the colour blue I thought what’s the point of buying new ones?
Well,stone the crows I am amazed you never needed an excuse to buy new shoes before even though you have 78 pairs already.
How do you know tl I have got 78 ,,?
Well I like the number 78 because it’s divisible by 13. So I counted your shoes to see if they would fit the pattern as I have got 65 pears.
And did Stan have 52 pairs ?
Of course not he was a man: men don’t have so many shoes. It dates back to when shoes had to be polished. No man would like to polish 52 pairs of shoes nor come to that would have liked to polish 13 If you have 13 pairs of shoes that will be one pair each for the 12 disciples of Jesus and Jesus himself at the Last Supper although if there were any folk serving the food there would not be enough for them. Why am I saying all these ridiculous things?
And any way how does being divisible by 13 help you or the world or in particular Sir Keir Starmer?
It’s hard to explain it but it just pleases me somehow maybe it’s a distraction from reality.
What is reality anyway Annie asked her rudely
Why it’s just like being back at Oxford with iris Murdoch as our tutor
You seem to forget that I did not go to Oxford; well I have been to the station of course but I never was matriculated there nor anywhere else for that matter. I did go into Marks and Spencer’s there though
Well you’re in good company because 99.99% of the world did not matriculate at Oxford. Most of them don’t even speak English and would not know what matriculation means. But they would all love to go into Marks and Spencers
Words are very interesting because sometimes we read words that we’ve never heard anyone say and we are likely to misspeak
Well I don’t know what anything means, to be honest.
Do you put a comma after means; it’s because if you don’t it’s a completely different sentence?
I see that you don’t know what it means to be honest Is that what you’re trying to tell me?
As long as you don’t use the term fake news I will be quite content with whatever you say whether or not I’ve ever heard the words before.
Give me some examples please
Mishap and awry
You have to see them written down and imagine you’ve never seen them before nor have you heard anyone say them and then you realize the problem unless you are very stupid in which case you won’t know if and your life will go on like a wide river flowing down slowly and gently into the sea with no great waves to drown any animals or people who are not being careful
Now I feel sleepy I wonder if I am awake or asleep. Am I really writing the story or am I just imagining it
How could I know?
How would you know that you know or that you knew,?
Do you know something Annie I think I’ll get married again because when you’re married to a man you don’t have conversations like this do you?
You are so right Mary.
I am so sorry that I am not a man. Evening by try to pretend to be a man I don’t think now my mind would change sufficiently to please you by a totally different kind of conversations not to mention other things that men and women might get up to in private.
Well I think it’s getting a bit late now so why don’t we stop here and then tomorrow we will make a new start
Can we make some new year resolutions ?
Well we can but we should think very carefully first and then we should think even more carefully afterwards.
Oh this is getting on my nerves why do we have to keep thinking all the time?
Do cats think;do eagle think?
Isn’t it wonderful that there are so many questions that don’t have any answers in the system in which we are enmeshed?
Now just stop that We’ve already had one Wittgenstein. I’m not sure if the world can take another one.
The best thing I’m going to do tomorrow is making a cake from a very old recipe that was handed down to me from my grandmother. And it’s got lots of ground almonds in it which are very nutritious as well as being delicious
That’s the best idea you’ve had tonight
My New Year resolution is to start to make cakes again at home and then to invite our friends around on Sunday afternoon to eat them
Well what else could they do with them?
And so say all of us
How my heart sings 