There are some advantages to being in hospital. You will not be paying for the heating nor for the food and that could save you quite a lot of money in the winter so why not budget for a fortnight in hospital midwinter.

Of course you can’t be sure which hospital you will be taken to once you have managed to have an emergency illness.

I was lucky because the hospital near me was completely full and so they were not taking anybody at all even someone is important as myself was turned away and I was taked to a hospital not very far from the best part of not London Highgate and Hampstead

Well it was very interesting because we actually got a Catholic chaplain coming round on Sunday morning to see if we wanted to take holy communio well it’s a long time since I was in church but who am I as refused something so good? No I mean it it was a very deep experience for me mainly because of the three other people who with me at the time and I enjoy being stuck with holy water anytime of the year really the Christmas especially.

It created a special bond with one of the other patients up till then and not been able to speak very much but she began to talk and was kind

But I got a message from God saying don’t leave it 49 years the next time because you won’t be here I’m by the way you are supposed to go to confession at least once a year so you’ve got 49 times to go why not go once a week for the next year that will cover you and it will make you remember all the sins that you thought you’d obliterated from your mind but other people didn’t know that and there were wondering why you didn’t apologize or even look guilty when they met yo

It’s rather like the WhatsApp messages when you want to delete your message you get the choice

Delete for me or delete for everybody

When we go into denial about our sins we believe that if we’ve deleted the sense of our mind as it were it would delete it from everybody’s mind but that’s not true is it?

It is better to face up to things. Bessing not to pretend that you’re someone other because people are compassionate when they see that you are sorry for what you may have done that offended them but if you pretend that you’re perfect when you didn’t defend anybody that does not go down well.

What am I thinking about I must have gone back 50 years or more because nowadays who talks about sin confession and receiving holy communion in a hospital ward.

It’s a pity we have so many different religions because if we all have the same one it would unify us. L

It’s a pity that being an atheist is not a unifying force. There is no liturgy there are no prayers there is no singing there’s no joining in.

Just for now we’ll forget about the bad side of many religions

I found the charger for my mobile phone

It’s super fast what did I do before?

I guess it’s part of any real smart home.

I feel it’s virtue deep within my bones

Once it was the oak tree I adored

The little path the cat walked on at night

And once it was the carpet on the floor.

The joy of children running with a kite.

But then I was invaded by new tech

The phone is not a phone it’s so much more

A computer in my hand, a crooked neck

And then I  knew I  had become a bore

Surely these fast charges are not gods

What is going on inside our heads

Stan was happy for a few moments when he woke up.Then he realized Emile was nowhere to be seen.Mary had already gone out as she wanted to catch a very early train to London.She needed to visit the British Library.She wanted to find evidence that Wittgenstein wore a hat in bed. Stan went searching around the house but Emile had vanished.Usually at 8 am he would be dashing about pretending to chase flies and giving a balletic performance worthy of Sadler’s Wells. I wonder who Sadler was, Stan muttered as he filled the kettle with fresh water and put some Earl Grey tea into the teapot. Then, a strange feeling came over him.He looked up and there was Emile crouched on top of the highest cupboard in the kitchen. Emile, he cried, What are you doing up there? I’m training to be a spy, Emile replied nonchalantly. But how could this kitchen be of interest to the Intelligence Services? Well, the cat murmured, I am practicing hiding. You gave me a terrible shock, Stan said.I had this feeling I was being watched.I wondered if it was paranoia.Then I saw your gleaming eyes. So, you need to get some dark glasses, Emile said. No ,I would still feel that horrible feeling.And how were you planning to get down from that high ledge? I’m not sure, the cat miaowed faintly Well, the first lesson for a spy or even a detective is, Never go anywhere unless you can make a quick exit, As it is ,I may have to ring 999. Just then the front doorbell rang.There stood a man with a white beard and moustache. Hello ,he said holding out his hand to shake Stan’s. I am called Peter Fried.I have just moved into one of the new flats across the road.I am a psychoanalyst.I have taken on another flat to use as a consulting room and a waiting room A psychoanalyst! Do we need one round here? Well, Good morning, I have just brewed some tea.Would you like to join me? How kind, said Peter. I say, old bean, did you know there’s a cat on top of your cupboard? Yes, that is Emile.Today he has surpassed himself in wickedness.How I will get him down I don’t know. My training analyst used to say, What goes up must eventually come down. That seems a bit weird for an analyst.To what was he referring… something to do with sex I don’t doubt.It’s all sex with you people. Yes, some of us are very peculiar…that’s why we enter the profession. What I meant was, if Emile got up he can get down.How did you get up, Emile? I leaped, answered the tense animal. Can you leap down? I’ve lost my nerve, replied the poor creature softly. Well, as it happens, being a therapist, I always carry few spare nerves with me.I’ll climb up this step ladder and pass you a new nerve. And without waiting, Peter climbed the ladder.He put his hand into his pocket and pulled out a golden thread. Here you are,Emile, Catch this in your claw. Emile caught the golden thread and wrapped it around his neck. Can you leap down now? enquired Stan. Emile leaped down and landed in a bowl of hot water in the sink. It’s a good thing I wasn’t making chips, laughed Stan hysterically Come here, Emile and let me dry you on this old towel.He put Emile in front of the fire and he and Peter drank mugs of Earl Grey tea. I have got a mistress, Stan told Peter. Well, do you want therapy for your conflict? Oh,no.I’m far too old for therapy or indeed for a mistress. She likes helping a man,making tea, typing notes, calculating averages and calling the ambulance.. you know what I mean.She likes the paramedic, Dave ás well. Is she not married? No , her husband fell into the wheelie bin during the night and alas he was taken away with the rubbish. That is a strange story.Are you certain? No, it could be he grew tired of her and ran away.Then she invented this story, Well , this may be a quiet suburb but I can see there is plenty of material here for me to write my next book: Deceptive appearances and the fascination of apparent dullness. Oh, that sounds very unusual. Well, I’ve never believed in true dullness.There is always a story. See, I’ve just met you a man of 98 yet you have a wife, a mistress and a crazy cat.. and I’ve only been here for one day.Imagine 6156119_f260 what else I may discover here. They heard a siren. Oh, no!We’ve not even rung 999 and here is the ambulance…. Mary will be so angry.You see Dave is bisexual My goodness, are you having an affair with him. No way, shouted Stan.My life is tough enough already.He can be bisexual or even trisexual but I’m not interested. What does trisexual mean, enquired Emile. I have no idea but I thought it sounded good, admitted Stan. Peter stood up. I think I’d better go home and start to see my patients. Now Emile, put your nerve somewhere safe.We don’t want you to lose it again. Thank you, darling cried Emile.I think I’ve formed an erotic transference with you already. Peter rushed out. Is it me or is it them?he wondered. I thought it would be quiet here on the edge of Knittingham but I think now wherever you are there will always be something unexpected happening.But I hope Emile will not begin to follow me around.I shall have to buy a lady cat and then Emile might fall in love with her instead.So off Peter went whistling a Bach cello suite and wondering how to cope with life in a suburb.. clearly it was not as dull as he had imagined. Share this:

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Where do tears come from,wet our eyes?

Where do griefs come from,where our sighs?

Will we have mourned enough one  new day?

Where does love come from, what does love say?

Does even God weep, where are his eyes?

Does even God weep as more children die?

Where is the saviour, where is the Cross?

Knock down the churches, they are no loss.

Weep with the grieving weep with the lost

Weep tears of blood for we all know the cost.

See vultures circling, eating the dead.

Can you love Western culture when you see where it’s led?

See the poor children hungry in school.

The scientists have proved they themselves are the fools.

Economics and warfare developed our brains

We are the victims by new mathematics chained.

Bring me the music bring me the song

The rhythm of the future beats like a gong