https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2021/aug/01/not-all-narcissists-are-grandiose-the-vulnerable-type-can-be-just-as-dangerous

We have to be breathing right to hear
the silence from which all song arises;
we have to be breathing slow
and gently
We have to be breathing right to feel it,
the tenderness in which we are held by nature.
We have to be breathing quiet
and soft
and to be looking receptively,
No desire for objects

We have to be breathing right to recall it
the music we heard when there was silence.
We have to be being breathed
by the world
We have to be part of the whole..

and so,we forget it as we are pounded

with the noise of radios and traffic
and people talking loudly on cell phones
walking by the green fields and river
past the secret heron
and the coots nest
past the daisies

When I am dying I shall think,
Why was I not breathing right?
Why was I scarcely breathing?
Why did I forget those moments?
Why did I not live

more deeply?
Why did i not sing more sweetly?
Why did I nor love more dearly?
Why did i not listen more carefully?

Why did I not sing more sweetly?
why did I not see more completely?

Why don’t we talk more gently?
Why don’t we look more intently?

Why were the poppies growing so wildly?
Why were the battlefields growing nightly?
Why did we murder men so lightly?
Why did we not love more rightly?
Why are the poppies covering the soil so politely?
When did the young soldiers leave so frightfully?

Why are we not here more quietly?

Mary heard a very strange sound as she came down the polished stairs of her bijou home.It was a loud two part shriek.
I wonder if that’s the new answering machine, she thought as she went to put the kettle on to make a pint of tea.She heard it again,but it was not continuous
Well it’s not the carbon monoxide detector either,she told Emile who was eating a sardine.Then she remembered hearing it before.
It’s the old phone handset with a flat battery,se murmured as she washed her hair in the kitchen sink with some Persil Silk and Wool detergent.
Annie came to the door
What’s that beep ?she cried.And why are you washing your hair here?
See if you can spot the phone.I can’t find it,Mary told her.I wash my hair sometimes just to clear my brain
Well,why not keep some shampoo here or that new wash and condition in one go I have found the phone.

It was in the waste paper basket!But you can’t put it in the bin,can you?
No I will have to pay £20 for a cab to the recycling centre,Mary said philosophically.
I’d better not leave it “by accident” on a bench given the current climate of fear.
Well if we remove the batteries it won’t shriek any more,Annie told her kindly.
How is the new phone doing ? she rambled on unthinkingly
OK.It has a special button so you can block someone after you have picked it up.There is some much fear now about WITHELD NUMBERS.At one time we only knew after we picked it up.If I use my phablet my sister hates it..Mary disclosed

She refused to have more than 2 numbers for me so it comes up as UNKNOWN
What is a phablet? Annie enquired sardonically,her little soft eyes crinkling with laughter which showed off her turquoise eye shadow which is actually a pastel stick from her art box! No longer can she goes to Wigan for divine makeup
It’s just a small tablet but you can make phone calls with it.
I didn’t know you had one of those!
Neither did Stan,Mary said with a touch of sadness.I only wish we could phone heaven from earth.
Wow,said Annie.Maybe it would spoil heaven…
How true, her friend responded.Let’s hope they have some attitude that they makes them have a different point of view from us. Now,I’ll dry my hair and you can tell me why you came.
Oh,dear,said Annie.Let me drink some tea.I can’t remember except that your wisteria has climbed up the rowan tree.
Was it shopping? Was it Dave?Let’s ring 999 and see what he has to say.
We’re all gray here,no fuss
We’ll all go play with puss,Emile,come back and.

Will Annie ever save up enough money to take the train to Wigan to buy some Eva St Laurent lipstick? This is one of the mysteries of life on which there is no point in thinking

After all she could buy some lipstick in knittingham for less than the train  fare to Wigan!

But that’s too easy because don’t you realize that we enjoy things a lot more when we have had to go to trouble to acquire them? And Wigan is near Southport which is a seaside resort so maybe it’s that which attracts the women. Oh it’s a very superior place. The sea may no longer come to the promenade. Who is interested in that?

There is an artificial lake. Need I say more?

No and so say all of us.