Did you know…..

Did you see that coats with very long sleeves are in fashion?I mean,like 18 inches too long!And then Victoria Beckham wa wearing a coat massively too big and I thought, “what luck.”
You see I bought a coat online and it is enormous.I was going to send it back but I see  I must wear it.The problem is I live in a pretty ordinary area where people won;t know about trends.So they will think I am crackers!
Unless I wear it with beige or light pink leggings and a crop top… and leave the oat undone.Otherwise I might be searched by the police in case someone from Europe is hiding inside it trying to get into  some place forbidden except to  Brits!
Let’s hope they don’t do some of the things we read about.I mean I am quite big but my sexual organs are not large enough to hide even a thin model who   is seeking asylum.If this goes on I’ll be in the asylum.It shows us how sinful  we really are, wearing over sized coats while people are having to listen to Mr Trump  and follow his tweets.
I mean,I could hardly believe all these politicians tweeting at 3 am.Why are they not with beautiful creatures like cats and dogs.Sharing their bed…I]Or even a teddy bear.It makes you think.Well I’d like to think but my mind is blank
We used to look up to some political leaders  but now Mrs Netanyahu is being tried for  not making the right sort of cake  for her husband.It’s very important, you know.A man needs cake every day otherwise he’ll go blind.Thinks…. is this the answer? Lack of cake.I know you can buy them but you don’t get to lick the bowl.I don’t know where I’d be if I hadn’t licked the bowl on Saturdays
I must be losing weight,my watch is too loose.It’s not trendy to wear a watch but when you keep your phone up your knicker leg  a watch seems a good idea.Where can you buy those knickers with pockets? They were really handy.I used to love threading elastic round the legs  with a safety pin.And to think if it were now I’d be on my IPad watching  Open University lectures on You Tube.
I am puzzled about how people afford iPads.Maybe my pension is smaller tham I imagined.Would you pay £700 for an iPhone? You could have bought a house for that when I was young.
It’s chick pea curry tonight.With pasta not rice.I am so contrary,I have fried bread every day and  ~I even buy it ready fried with mashed potato in the Supermarket.That makes me blink