Don’t go where we have gone 

Down by the House of Commons
My love and I did roam
We were looking for a Monet
To decorate our home

Down by the Palace Gardens
We went a-walking next
As we believed that in that green
It was ok to have sex.

We were caught by the police!
My wife was quite displeased.
“Oh,can we plead not guilty ,sir.
We didn’t know where we are!”

Down in the court of magistrates
We were accused of sin.
We stood there in the dock
Is it prison or the bin?

I thought sin was not a crime!
I didn’t even make it rhyme!
But in this country, there’s a link
Sin and crime have now  been synched!

We asked to go to Westminster
To confess to a Catholic priest.
We could just take a penance
From a man who’s like a beast.

But the judge was feeling lazy
He sentenced us to death.
And we are going to die because
We wandered from the path.

If you want to get a Monet,
Buy one from Amazon.
And if you want to make sweet love
Don’t go where we have gone