Day: April 23, 2016

I want a fried egg

I said I want a fried egg, not  tickle my leg
I said is it  colder at night,not when’s your flight
I said where’s my nightdress,not your royal highness.
I said let’s make the bed.  not forsake the dead
I said where’s the emotion, not what a commotion
I said what’s a vibrator, not  you’re a gyrator
I said I feel worn not I feel scorn.
I feel so alone,not I want a scone.
I feel like the world has swung too far,not I’ll be hanged for a guitar
I said,isn’t life fun, not you are the one.
I said,geometry’s curved ,not George’s car swerved.
I said how nice is Obama,not I am the Dalai Lama.
I said,I make my own bread, not  bring back the dead.
I said what is the time,not did you like my mime?
I’m off to bed and I am nearly dead

Pull the other one

magnolia. 2 jpg

 

I want some egg and bacon,not to  make a career of fakin’
I wanted to have a  hot bath not to   provoke bitter wrath.
I wanted to conceal my menstruation not to give men an invitation
I was telling the truth ,not mending  the roof
I was washing my ears not  enjoying his leers
I said I fell out of bed.Not,I am dead.
My knees are  annoying but I don’t permit toying.
I said I prefer the rural life , not  his alluring wife.
I said give me a rest, not you are a pest.
I said,where is my tea,not I love her knee.
I asked if you had wine,not are you a swine.
I said I feel terribly tired, not you were a terrible squire.
I said her mother has dementia,not that she torments her.
I said where’s my pink lipstick, not  I am a mystic.
I said try meditation,not grow vegetation.
I said,Are you quite mad,not are you my dad
I said I need speech therapy  not your hips creak terribly.
I said are you going deaf not I’m short of breath.
I said ,try a few eggs not I love your legs

Convicted

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My husband is a very good man
He gets convicted as much as he can
For if he’s in jail
I save on the ale
And I make no hot dinner in my pan.

I found  it quite funny, you see
For he looked unconvincing to me
He was wearing the gear
But he never went near
So he committed no crime LSD.

However he now has convictions quite strong
He believes Jesus Christ had it wrong
The meek get pushed down
And the wise  attract frowns
So he’s   uttering both sermons and songs.

Being a prisoner’s so tough
The bed linen’s terribly rough
The food is abysmal
The surroundings are  dismal
I really think he’s had enough.

But now he has seen the great Light
I shall see  the entire bulb tonight.
It looks like  a moon
But it plays a loud tune
Appealing to both hearing and sight.

Stick to your convictions and pray
That man will be wiser one day
For if we don’t falter
Our course will not alter
And ,with a bang ,we will fly far away

What’s right with you?

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One of the BBC young musicians of the year giving a Hebrew lesson BBC 4 22 April 2016

 Unknown quotes  |

The pain

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Sometimes I had my eye too close to the keyhole
Pulled there by some force like gravity.

I was gazing with a sharp but narrow focus

into what I thought was the real.

But the precision of my gaze

left out the surroundings, the other doors and rooms

that  I might have inhabited.

As he came to me and opened his arms with no rancour,,

so my eyes opened wider,I took in the new wide vision

and left my crouched and aching position

no longer attached like a magnet to your force.

He was there with his sea eyes.

He knew the human condition

And how to inhabit a  conversation.

Of course he’s had his wounds but never failed to feel

for himself and others.

In the night he went through in his mind’s eye the faces

of his friends;holding them ,like he’d once held fragile rose buds

when we were married,

and asked silently for grace.

The keyhole no longer seemed important

I suppose narrowing the focus can keep out knowledge of pain..

But the pain is atill there;

I have always loved the word “Acknowledge.”
And now I use it. I acknowledge this pain

Doubt:what is it?

IMG_0045
 doubt

A wonderful word is coercion

A  wonderful word is coercion
On it I cast no aspersions.
But to coerce is not good,
Force unwithstood
Is not what will grow our nasturiums.

 

Sometimes our will is a force
But virtue can’t come just by choice.
Like a flower from a seed
Our virtues we breed
As we listen for that still,little voice.

In school we were given an impression
That knowledge implies good decisions;
So we learned   virtues and vice
The wrong and  the  nice
The existence of hell as a prison.

 

Believing that terror is a good,
They frightened us with their cold blood
In the Confessional we shivered;
And the wood round us quivered
They’d have tortured us more if they could.

So this education itself was a vice
The nuns and the priests hit us twice
Once in the class
And again during Mass
Where we wondered if the Wafer was Christ.

And having this question in mind
Was a sin of a serious kind
We sinned against Faith
That delicate Wraith
So no personal truths could we find

I have found God in the depths
Where with kindness he surrounds those who’ve wept
But he makes no demands
As his Love understands
To the paths of our own truths we’ve kept

To coerce

KODAK Digital Still Camera
KODAK Digital Still Camera

From Merriam Webster

coerce

play

verb co·erce \kō-ˈərs\

Simple Definition of coerce

  • : to make (someone) do something by using force or threats

  • : to get (something) by using force or threats

Full Definition of coerce

coerced coercing

  1. transitive verb

  2. 1:  to restrain or dominate by force <religion in the past has tried to coerce the irreligious — W. R. Inge>

  3. 2:  to compel to an act or choice <was coerced into agreeing>

  4. 3:  to achieve by force or threat <coerce complian

Examples of coerce in a sentence

  1. A confession was coerced from the suspect by police.

  2. <was coerced into signing the document>

 Origin of coerce

Middle English cohercen, from Anglo-French*cohercer Latin coercēre, from co- + arcēreto shut up, enclose — more at ark
First Known Use: 15th century

PM reveals all

church-at-night
And this in the News for Today

The PM admitted that PPE is a  degree which does not cover statistics,ethics,value judgements,spelling, and kindness.
On the other hand it’s easier than Greats which has Latin,Greek and Philosophy  over a 4 yeat period.Now what’s what I call a real education.

Studying Art is also a good education because you learn about Perspective,Proportion and Ratios.And the Golden Mean.

A woman reveals all

I was looking for the Sole Gate,not a soul mate.
I want a new friend but they thought I said end
I wanted bread and butter,not to marry a nutter.
I asked for a cup of tea,not for where to pee.
I asked for some chips,not to be whipped.
I asked for directions not for an inspection.
I want  a new lover,not  men to hover
I want to be free,not to go out to sea.
I was looking at bras,not watching sports cars.
I am ironing my frock not  standing in the dock
I bought a new clock but they thought I said flock.

So now I am a shepherdess

Every great man

  • Behind every great man there’s a great woe
  • Behind  his eight balls?
  • Behind   the rhymes
  • Being led down the hardened path,
  • Bell, Book and Wrangle
  • The hell of the ball gave me schizophrenia.Still I can spell
  • Bills and  bristles ruined our marriage.So shave now and phone the bank
  • Below The Belt is the Belly
  • Below The Salt is the table
  • Belt and Braces… is he nervous?
  • He felt up then down.Then up.
  • To bend over backwards  is too much to expect of the older person
  • Blend Rover? He’s a St Bernard!
  • Best laid plans of lice aid wrens..News Flash
  • Best sing since device read,crooned the meter reader
  • Set it all?
  • Bait the yarn and catch a rat
  • Bet your bottom hollow
  • Better carve than chew
  • Better fate than  endeavour
  • Better Ralph than Terry

Soul mate?

Noetic,poetic
Neurotic,exotic
Rheumatic,ecstatic
Myopic,beatific
Unusually bright
Sometimes a delight.
Introverted,intuitive
Quizzical,communicative
Tastefully dressed
Artistically blessed.
Beautiful eyes
Never tells lies.
If I suit your needs
Write please but don’t tease
And don’t be alarmed
I usually come armed.

 

Noetic in verse

I like to write verses poetic
Without being over noetic
So I’ve cancelled the Times
And  practised rude rhymes
But sometimes my mind will not get it.

Am I too philosophic for  you?
Do you write any limericks too?
With practise comes ease
And  rhythms that please.
And it helps me when I’m feeling blue

To be born before we die

 

 

5352445_f248Most people die before they are fully born. Creativeness means to be born before one dies.
Erich Fromm

I gaze up through red maple leaves

 In summer time when sun do shine
I'm happy on my own

I gaze up through red maple leaves

All transparent in the sun.

 

But when winter comes I'm lonely

Sitting here beside my fire.

So I want a winter lover

To keep my spirits higher.

 

Oh,my winter love come to me

And I'll gaze deep into your eyes

The light that shines in there

Is so much warmer than my fire.

 

We'll go through wintry woodlands,

Where elegance lies bare.

The branches warmed by sun

Now feel the frosty grasp of air.

 

I'll love you all the winter time.

I'll love you in the dark.

I'd like to rest within your arms,

And have a peaceful talk

 

When summer comes I'll disappear

To roam across the dales

I'll sleep on heather moorlands

And send you loving mail.

 

I can't be tied in summer-time

I must be roaming free.

But ,if you accept this  need of mine,

To you I'll faithful be.

 

The important moments

You might think you would
Recognise the important moments
Of your life,that you made choices
That determined your future as well
As your present.You never imagined
One unprotected scarcely thought about
Sexual act could determine the course
Of your entire life.That one small,to you,
Act of unfaithfullness would precipitate
Divorce,death,agony for ever.
That smiling at someone on a stairway
Could make them fall into unrequited
Love.Surely these moments should have labels,
Capital letters,trumpets blaring.
It’s like undoing just one stitch in a seam
Will make the entire garment fall apart.
Other people’s suicide,accident.love
Hit you like bricks.And you fall down
Like a bombed house in Dresden
Full of refugees.Those you meant to care for,
Who are now long past redemption.
And which moment it is will be quite indeterminate
Until it happens and life is changed for ever.
The river sweeps on,but on a new bed.
Was it meant to be like this?
Someone stole my bike and then I met
My husband.I went out with a lover
And met another on the corner,
Alloa,Alloa,that’s Swedish!
Alloa,Alloa,this is it.Alloa.Remember

How median,how average?

 

 

 

Stan was just about to begin his talk on “Averages” when a   clap of thunder  frightened the old folk who were listening to him, while eating their first  slices of marmalade cake which his dear wife Mary had baked and iced with orange icing
That was loud,cried Minnie  Muddle from the next street.I hate thunder.Her white face did look very pale especially as she used to use Blusher in Pale Orange.However she couldn’t afford it  any more
I like it,Stan remarked,but Emile  is nervous.And there was Emile inside the big wicker waste paper basket with his amber eyes gleaming anxiously and his tongue licking his dry lips.
Well,said Stan,the word “average” has different meanings in different  situations.
In ordinary language it usually means typical. However in  statistics  which analayses data it is used as a way of describing the “centre”  or” center”of the data.
There is more than one way of- doing this.
If we are asked the average wage in the UK and told it is £26,500 what does it mean?
Does it mean nearly every body gets that?
Well.I don’t called, his neighbour,John as he re-arranged his tartan kilt over his knobbly grey knees.
This is based on people in work,Stan replied kindly.
It is called the median which is that figure such that 50% get less than this and 50% get more.I can’t recall where the folk who get exactly that are placed.So 50% of people in work get less than £26,500.Some on the lowest wages get only about £11,000. and even less if they are part-time or on zero hour contracts.
And of course  we know bankers and rock-stars get millions some years.So it’s not  telling us much about the spread or range of wages.How far they differ or deviate.We can measure that but it is based on the mean wage.We get that by adding up all the wages and dividing by the number of workers.
The mean is usually higher as it is pulled up the the million pound earners.In London wages are higher

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Example:

GLA Household Income Estimates

 July 30, 2015

By

In July 2015, the GLA published an update to the Household Income estimates. This data covers a range of geographies from Lower Super Output Areas (LSOAs) to UK regions. The full dataset can be downloaded from the London Datastore.

The median household income for London in 2013/13 was £39,100, while the mean income was £51,770.

5230546_f248That’s enough for one day,Stan,whispered Annie.She was looking very glamorous in her red knit dress and purple tights which matched her eyeshadow – she had  got  that in Harrods.It was called.Purple Princess.The only problem was it was hard to remove and the matching cleanser cost £40.As she was on only a quarter of the  median income in the UK she could not afford it so she had to keep wearing this colour regardless…. unless perchance she did some shop-lifting which is, of course ,a crime.As Annie had killed her own husband and got away with it,no doubt stealing Eye Make Up Remover was pretty low on her list of sins or crimes.
Some crimes are sins  but some are not.such as stealing food for your baby if you can’t afford to buy it.However eyes shadow is not essential to life even for a woman like Annie.
Stan boiled the big kettle and made the tea while Annie cut up the  remaining marmalade cake and passed it round. to all the merry pensioners staring at the Blackboard somewhat tentatively.
What about pensions,asked John plaintively.What is the average there?
I think we’ll wait for a few days before we  tackle that or you can google it and see what you find.The State Pension is about £6,600 per annum but many people also have a pension from their jobs too.That is really important if you can get it.
I don’t know how people live on the State Pension, Minnie cried.I suppose they eat tripe and oxtail and such things.Or steal from the waste bins of their neighbours.
What exactly is tripe? her friend Joan enquires tactfully;her blue eyes full of tears..
I think it’s the lining from the cow’s stomach or intestines,Annie cried.
No wonder people go to McDonald’s.It might be a cheap cut  but we don’t know.
Annie jumped up to turn on  the  fan heater and knocked over Stan who was sitting by her.He fell  over and his chair broke in half.
That chair must have been listening to your talk,chortled John swinging his kilt humorously.Fortunately he was wearing some green underpants and a half slip in silk beige.
Ring  999.Stan called.We need help from Dave.Emile was very pleased because he preferred chatting to Dave to listening to Stan’s lectures.As does the average person in the UK,so I guess.

P1000308
Fortify me with tea