The way we say it

 

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Someone has just realised that in psychoanalysis the way the therapist speaks and the manner it is done in are as important as the words.

In other words,it’s poetry.

Surely that is true in all relationships?

Two religions are better than one

Pray Father,give me your guessing.
My guessing!Don’t you mean my blessing.
Oh,probably.Possibly..who knows.
So have you any sins to tell me?
Yes,I broke a glass jug.
Whose was it?
It was mine,Father.
Surely it’s not a sin to break your own jug?
It is if you hit yourself on the head with it!
What made you do that?
I was angry with myself…I had been committing effrontery.
Do you mean adultery?Your main problem seems to be bad language.
No,Father I never say” Fuck”
You just did.
Well I had to do.I had no choice!
That’s what they all say…if only I heard some original sin I’d find life more interesting.
Well,it’s hard to think of anything original to do especially if it has to be a sin too.
You are just not using your creativity.
All right Father,Put your hands up.i’ve got a gun.
Where did you find that?
In my wife’s handbag.
Now we are getting somewhere.. that’s threatening a priest,interfering in your wife’s privacy and stealing a gun.Any other sins?
I could shoot you,I suppose.
No.no!That is going too far.
Shall I slap you?
No… just say something rude to me.
Your sermons are the most boring I have ever heard.
Well,that’s enough…I’ve never been so insulted in my life.
You have been very lucky then… you should hear what people say to me!
Well,you are both ugly and unintelligent.I don’t know how you had the nerve to marry.
I had no choice.She forced me.But I gave in quickly in case she changed her mind.
And you have seven children.
No, they are not all mine,And they are Jewish.
How can they be Jewish.
My wife is Jewish!
I thought she was just a lapsed Catholic.
No,she’s Jewish but not even an arranged marriage could be arranged for her so she used her imagination and decided an overweight ugly Catholic would be grateful for her love,
And are you grateful?
Yes, and so are all her lovers!
Who are they?
The curate is one of them and has two children .. they look just like him too.
And does she want them raised as Jews?
She just let’s them rise naturally and go with the flow.

Do they have to wear hats?
Only in the Synagogue!
Are you Jewish too.
Yes,it’s quite handy as we have Sabbath on Saturday and then we have Sunday on Sunday if you see what I mean.
I never met anyone who practised two religions before.;
Well,I figured it would double my chance of salvation!
Well. I must speak to the Rabbi.For your penance you must give £50 to Homeless at Xmas.
Am I absolved.
If you stay any longer you’ll be dissolved!
Thank you,Father.
And take that gun away.I don’t want it.
I can get you a good price for your cassock.
Why,thank you,my child

A duck

 

My boyfriend has gone to the war
Though fighting is not what he’s for
He emended his Will
And left me a bill
On a duck in the mud by the car.

He apprehended my guilt and my fear
Without words he told me I was dear.
He recognised my loss
And sold me some floss
So a my teeth are now right in the clear.

Apprehend me tonight

I’m apprehensive about teaching at the comprehensive school

He is comprehensively apprehensive about incomprehensible ghouls or fools

I’m immeasurably happy today.

We give apprehensive accident cover

App free pensives here

I have prehensile toes

Maps

A doctor may give you advice
Which may  uncomprehendingly  be taken  in  twice.
The first time ‘s the best
And afterwards  rest
Then admire her for she is most wise.

 

A diagram is useful in maths;
Or in comprehending the Underground maps.
But the world is far more
Than these lines can show.
I should mention we never show traps

 

The diaphragm is a muscle I think,
That makes us  each breath and then wink
It divides thorax and abdomen
In ladies and gentlemen;
Inside, both the sexes are pink

Intimations of Immortality

Ode: Intimations of Immortality from Recollections of Early Childhood

BY WILLIAM WORDSWORTH

The child is father of the man;
And I could wish my days to be
Bound each to each by natural piety.
(Wordsworth, “My Heart Leaps Up”)

There was a time when meadow, grove, and stream,
       The earth, and every common sight,
                              To me did seem
                      Apparelled in celestial light,
               The glory and the freshness of a dream.
It is not now as it hath been of yore;—
                      Turn wheresoe’er I may,
                              By night or day.
The things which I have seen I now can see no more.
                      The Rainbow comes and goes,
                      And lovely is the Rose,
                      The Moon doth with delight
       Look round her when the heavens are bare,
                      Waters on a starry night
                      Are beautiful and fair;
       The sunshine is a glorious birth;
       But yet I know, where’er I go,
That there hath past away a glory from the earth.
Now, while the birds thus sing a joyous song,
       And while the young lambs bound
                      As to the tabor’s sound,
To me alone there came a thought of grief:
A timely utterance gave that thought relief,
                      And I again am strong:
The cataracts blow their trumpets from the steep;
No more shall grief of mine the season wrong;
I hear the Echoes through the mountains throng,
       The Winds come to me from the fields of sleep,
                      And all the earth is gay;
                              Land and sea
               Give themselves up to jollity,
                      And with the heart of May
               Doth every Beast keep holiday;—
                      Thou Child of Joy,
Shout round me, let me hear thy shouts, thou happy Shepherd-boy.
Ye blessèd creatures, I have heard the call
       Ye to each other make; I see
The heavens laugh with you in your jubilee;
       My heart is at your festival,
               My head hath its coronal,
The fulness of your bliss, I feel—I feel it all.
                      Oh evil day! if I were sullen
                      While Earth herself is adorning,
                              This sweet May-morning,
                      And the Children are culling
                              On every side,
                      In a thousand valleys far and wide,
                      Fresh flowers; while the sun shines warm,
And the Babe leaps up on his Mother’s arm:—
                      I hear, I hear, with joy I hear!
                      —But there’s a Tree, of many, one,
A single field which I have looked upon,
Both of them speak of something that is gone;
                      The Pansy at my feet
                      Doth the same tale repeat:
Whither is fled the visionary gleam?
Where is it now, the glory and the dream?
Our birth is but a sleep and a forgetting:
The Soul that rises with us, our life’s Star,
                         Hath had elsewhere its setting,
                              And cometh from afar:
                      Not in entire forgetfulness,
                      And not in utter nakedness,
But trailing clouds of glory do we come
                      From God, who is our home:
Heaven lies about us in our infancy!
Shades of the prison-house begin to close
                      Upon the growing Boy,
But he beholds the light, and whence it flows,
                      He sees it in his joy;
The Youth, who daily farther from the east
                      Must travel, still is Nature’s Priest,
                      And by the vision splendid
                      Is on his way attended;
At length the Man perceives it die away,
And fade into the light of common day.
Earth fills her lap with pleasures of her own;
Yearnings she hath in her own natural kind,
And, even with something of a Mother’s mind,
                      And no unworthy aim,
                      The homely Nurse doth all she can
To make her Foster-child, her Inmate Man,
                      Forget the glories he hath known,
And that imperial palace whence he came.
Behold the Child among his new-born blisses,
A six years’ Darling of a pigmy size!
See, where ‘mid work of his own hand he lies,
Fretted by sallies of his mother’s kisses,
With light upon him from his father’s eyes!
See, at his feet, some little plan or chart,
Some fragment from his dream of human life,
Shaped by himself with newly-learn{e}d art
                      A wedding or a festival,
                      A mourning or a funeral;
                              And this hath now his heart,
                      And unto this he frames his song:
                              Then will he fit his tongue
To dialogues of business, love, or strife;
                      But it will not be long
                      Ere this be thrown aside,
                      And with new joy and pride
The little Actor cons another part;
Filling from time to time his “humorous stage”
With all the Persons, down to palsied Age,
That Life brings with her in her equipage;
                      As if his whole vocation
                      Were endless imitation.
Thou, whose exterior semblance doth belie
                      Thy Soul’s immensity;
Thou best Philosopher, who yet dost keep
Thy heritage, thou Eye among the blind,
That, deaf and silent, read’st the eternal deep,
Haunted for ever by the eternal mind,—
                      Mighty Prophet! Seer blest!
                      On whom those truths do rest,
Which we are toiling all our lives to find,
In darkness lost, the darkness of the grave;
Thou, over whom thy Immortality
Broods like the Day, a Master o’er a Slave,
A Presence which is not to be put by;
Thou little Child, yet glorious in the might
Of heaven-born freedom on thy being’s height,
Why with such earnest pains dost thou provoke
The years to bring the inevitable yoke,
Thus blindly with thy blessedness at strife?
Full soon thy Soul shall have her earthly freight,
And custom lie upon thee with a weight,
Heavy as frost, and deep almost as life!
                      O joy! that in our embers
                      Is something that doth live,
                      That Nature yet remembers
What was so fugitive!
The thought of our past years in me doth breed
Perpetual benediction: not indeed
For that which is most worthy to be blest;
Delight and liberty, the simple creed
Of Childhood, whether busy or at rest,
With new-fledged hope still fluttering in his breast:—
                      Not for these I raise
                      The song of thanks and praise
               But for those obstinate questionings
               Of sense and outward things,
               Fallings from us, vanishings;
               Blank misgivings of a Creature
Moving about in worlds not realised,
High instincts before which our mortal Nature
Did tremble like a guilty thing surprised:
                      But for those first affections,
                      Those shadowy recollections,
               Which, be they what they may
Are yet the fountain-light of all our day,
Are yet a master-light of all our seeing;
               Uphold us, cherish, and have power to make
Our noisy years seem moments in the being
Of the eternal Silence: truths that wake,
               To perish never;
Which neither listlessness, nor mad endeavour,
                      Nor Man nor Boy,
Nor all that is at enmity with joy,
Can utterly abolish or destroy!
               Hence in a season of calm weather
                      Though inland far we be,
Our Souls have sight of that immortal sea
                      Which brought us hither,
               Can in a moment travel thither,
And see the Children sport upon the shore,
And hear the mighty waters rolling evermore.
Then sing, ye Birds, sing, sing a joyous song!
                      And let the young Lambs bound
                      As to the tabor’s sound!
We in thought will join your throng,
                      Ye that pipe and ye that play,
                      Ye that through your hearts to-day
                      Feel the gladness of the May!
What though the radiance which was once so bright
Be now for ever taken from my sight,
               Though nothing can bring back the hour
Of splendour in the grass, of glory in the flower;
                      We will grieve not, rather find
                      Strength in what remains behind;
                      In the primal sympathy
                      Which having been must ever be;
                      In the soothing thoughts that spring
                      Out of human suffering;
                      In the faith that looks through death,
In years that bring the philosophic mind.
And O, ye Fountains, Meadows, Hills, and Groves,
Forebode not any severing of our loves!
Yet in my heart of hearts I feel your might;
I only have relinquished one delight
To live beneath your more habitual sway.
I love the Brooks which down their channels fret,
Even more than when I tripped lightly as they;
The innocent brightness of a new-born Day
                              Is lovely yet;
The Clouds that gather round the setting sun
Do take a sober colouring from an eye
That hath kept watch o’er man’s mortality;
Another race hath been, and other palms are won.
Thanks to the human heart by which we live,
Thanks to its tenderness, its joys, and fears,
To me the meanest flower that blows can give
Thoughts that do often lie too deep for tears.

Acquit language

I apprehended my mother before I acquired language
However I never did fully comprehend her and her motives.needs and desires.
Although I acquired language I never acquited it.What is truth?What is a word?How do we say it?

Apprehend or comprehend

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Bartleby.com  on apprehend and comprehend

Only in the “understand” sense are these words synonyms, although apprehend seems to stress understanding in the sense of “recognizing” (He seems to have apprehended, finally, that he has no standing in the case), whereas comprehend seems to stress understanding as “the intellectual process required to achieve comprehension” (After studying the various proposals, we finally comprehended what all the fuss was about).

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Apprehend

Definition of apprehend in English:

apprehend

Pronunciation: /aprɪˈhɛnd/

VERB

[WITH OBJECT]

1Arrest (someone) for a crime:a warrant was issued but he has not been apprehended

2Understand or perceive:we enter a field of vision we could not otherwise apprehend

2.1archaic Anticipate (something) with uneasiness or fear:he is a man that apprehends death no more dreadfully but as a drunken sleep

Origin

Late Middle English (originally in the sense ‘grasp, get hold of (physically or mentally’)): from French appréhender or Latin apprehendere, from ad- ‘towards’ + prehendere ‘lay hold of’.

Words that rhyme with apprehend

amend, append, ascend, attend, befriend, bend, blend, blende, commend, comprehend, condescend, contend, defriend, depend, emend, end, expend, extend, fend, forfend, friend, impend, interdepend, lend, mend, misapprehend, misspend, offend, on-trend, Oostende, Ostend, perpend, portend, rend, reprehend, scrag-end, send, spend, subtend, suspend, tail end, tend, transcend, trend, u

To comprehend

Definition of comprehend in English:

 comprehend
Pronunciation: /kɒmprɪˈhɛnd/
VERB
[WITH OBJECT]

1[OFTEN WITH NEGATIVE] Grasp mentally; understand:he couldn’t comprehend her reasons for marrying Lovat[WITH CLAUSE]: I simply couldn’t comprehend what had happened

formal Include, comprise, or encompass:a divine order comprehending all men

Origin

Middle English: from Old French comprehender, or Latin comprehendere, from com- ‘together’ + prehendere ‘grasp’.

A lost embrace

A stifled cry,
A leaking eye
A tenseness in the muscle tone
A look aghast, a muffled groan
A posture altered
Hands that falter
Mind uncertain
Heart a-lurching
Sharp neuralgia in the face
A litttle trace
A lost embrace
No one  reflects my face to me
I’ m not a person now, you see
The overlapping on our maps
The understanding sharing grasps.
I keep emotions all within
For my existence is a sin.
In this way, I squeeze up tight
As if to space I have no right.
A look can kill
Destroy the will
Turn to stone and mute the groan
I’ll be a statue and admired
My marriage licence has expired

Apprehension;

A word with more than  one meaning
aprɪˈhɛnʃ(ə)n/
noun
noun: apprehension; plural noun: apprehensions
  1. 1.
    anxiety or fear that something bad or unpleasant will happen.
    “he felt sick with apprehension”
    synonyms: anxiety, angst, alarm, worry, uneasiness, unease, nervousness,misgiving, disquiet, concern, agitation, restlessness, edginess,fidgetiness, nerves, tension, trepidation, perturbation, consternation,panic, fearfulness, dread, fear, shock, horror, terror; More

    antonyms: confidence
  2. 2.
    understanding; grasp.
    “his first apprehension of such large issues”
    synonyms: understanding, grasp, comprehension, realization, recognition,appreciation, discernment, perception, awareness, cognizance,consciousness, penetration

    “she was popular because of her quick apprehension of the wishes of the people”
  3. 3.
    the action of arresting someone.
    “they acted with intent to prevent lawful apprehension”
    synonyms: arrest, capture, seizure, catching; More

Origin
late Middle English (in the sense ‘learning, acquisition of knowledge’): from late Latina apprehensio(n- ), from apprehendere ‘seize, grasp’ (see apprehend).

The blind can walk

His manners false, to  which he was half true
Had driven maidens into  lives of worth
And though he lied, he never  heard a  mew
H e raised his hat and so revealed his  purse

 

His voice ,so like a siren, charmed the  goats
His eyes were  plaster yet his ears were wool.
He claimed it was  protection from the stoats
Of which the town of London’s overfull

 

His rhetoric impeccable he knew
To speak would be an error deja vu.
And yet his  snakey tongue was free from glue.
While on his nose he always kept new  dew.

He did at Sodom study P.P.E.
The blind can walk, the cripples now can see.

Meaning of “schmooze” in the English Dictionary

  • Created with Nokia Smart Cam
    Created with Nokia Smart Camera

“schmooze” in British English

schmooze verb [I]

UK   US   /ʃmuːz/ informal

(Definition of schmooze from the Cambridge Advanced Learner’s Dictionary & Thesaurus© Cambridge

Dietrich Bonhoeffer: “Who am I?”

Do read this

Θεόφιλος's avatarDover Beach

Who am I? They often tell me
I stepped from my cell’s confinement
Calmly, cheerfully, firmly,
Like a squire from his country-house.
Who am I? They often tell me
I used to speak to my warders
Freely and friendly and clearly,
As though it were mine to command.
Who am I? They also also tell me
I bore the days of misfortune
Equably, smilingly, proudly,
Like one accustomed to win.

Am I then really all that which other men tell me of?
Or am I only what I myself know of myself?
Restless and longing and sick, like a bird in a cage,
Struggling for breath, as though hands were compressing my thoat,
Yearning for colours, for flowers, for the voices of birds,
Thirsting for words of kindness, for neighbourliness,
Tossing in expectation of great events,
Powerlessly trembling for friends at an infinite distance,
Weary and empty at praying, at…

View original post 84 more words

Dignity’s own dance

What did she convey when she moved thus
A branch of willow bending to the lake?
So eloquent the gesture,with no fuss;
So brief , yet   there,  an image I could take.

 

We dance with gestures,  sometimes seen and shared;
With awkwardness as   over desks we’ve bowed.
Yet in these movements , our deep self is bared
And  given dignity when  none’s allowed

 

For as there is no name for this, our form;
No vigilante’s listed it as sin
And so our human dance goes on and on
From what is now and what  once might have been.

 

We are all partner’s in the earthly dance,
From serendip to  glorious happenstance

 

 

When is a proverb a cliche?

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A bad beginning makes a good ending.

• A bad excuse is better than none at all.

• A bad husband cannot be a good man.

• A beggar can never be bankrupt.

• A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush.

• A burnt child dreads fire.

• A cat may look at a king.

• A cheerful look makes a dish a feast.

• A cheerful wife is the joy of life.

• A clear conscience is a coat of mail.

• A drowning man will catch at a straw.

• A drunkard’s purse is a bottle.

• A fault confessed is half redressed.

• A fool and his money are soon parted.

• A fool may give a wise man counsel.

• A fool may make money, but it takes a wise man to spend it.

• A friend in need is a friend indeed.

• A friend is easier lost than found.

• A friend’s frown is better than a fool’s smile.

• A full purse makes the mouth to speak.

• A good dog deserves a good bone.

• A good husband makes a good wife.

• A good name is better than riches.

• A good name is sooner lost than won.

• A great talker is a great liar.

• A guilty conscience needs no accuser.

• A hungry man is an angry man.

As brave as

He was as  upright as a  willow tree in a gale
As tender as a Brazil  nut left over from last year
As kind as a  mad tiger in a small  cage
As brave as a  new born kitten
As eloquent as a recorder.
As musical as a mute cello
As tall as the dog
As well read as a cornflakes packet
In short,he was the man I was not waiting for.
I always knew I would recognise him when I met him

Syntax,the meaning

Syntax
ˈsɪntaks/
noun
noun: syntax
  1. 1.
    the arrangement of words and phrases to create well-formed sentences in a language.
    “the syntax of English”
    • a set of rules for or an analysis of the syntax of a language.
      plural noun: syntaxes
      “generative syntax”
    • the branch of linguistics that deals with syntax.
  2. 2.
    the structure of statements in a computer language.
Origin
late 16th century: from French syntaxe, or via late Latin from Greek suntaxis, from sun-‘together’ + tassein ‘arrange

That places value on the good of all.

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There is a sense that permeates our souls
That places value on the good of all.
Humankind is viewed then as a whole.
Blame not allocated to  a Fall.

Shall we believe that God can sulk for aeons
That he will torment  creatures for their sin?
Such theories are dilemmas to our brains
And put us in a  race we cannot win.

Should Eve and Adam still be here on earth
If  on that plum they had not sucked and bit?
It makes our lives seem to have little worth
To take this as a given in Holy Writ.

For  life’s for adults, not for girls and boys.
Do “Christian” theories take the place of toys?

By a leaf

I am a gleaming aubergine
in an oval dish
My purple skin is polished
Like BBC English.

I await my fate for I am ripe
My seeds fulfil my wish
Soon,soon the knife will cut me up
As corn in fields is threshed.

I’d rather lie in Egypt’s soil
By birds and insects bit
But here I am in England
Where irony is wit.

After cutting comes the salt
As in a bowl I sit
For I am moist like lady’s parts
As poets have much writ.

Moussaka is my destiny
And as you bite and chew
I shall  be  what Jesus was
And give my grace to you

I am fried in olive oil
To give me flavour ripe.
Dried in cloth and placed in pot
Atop the meat I ride.

 

My colour  brings all eyes to me
As I lie in a heap.
Some like carrot heads so bright
Royal purple is my state.

So better than a lamb I am
For a sacrifice.
I am proud and gleam  like gold
As Caesar-like I’m knifed.

 

My seeds through sewers deep shall pass
And somewhere come to grief.
I shall grow again and be
Portrayed by a leaf.

Paragraph? From two dictionaries

P1000311
Paragraph from British Dictionary
/ˈpærəˌɡrɑːf; -ˌɡræf/

noun

1.

(in a piece of writing) one of a series of subsections each usuallydevoted to one idea and each usually marked by the beginning of new line, indentation, increased interlinear space, etc

2.

(printing) the character ¶, used as a reference mark or to indicate thebeginning of a new paragraph

3.

a short article in a newspaper

verb (transitive)

4.

to form into paragraphs

5.

to express or report in a paragraph
Derived Forms
paragraphic (ˌpærəˈɡræfɪk), paragraphical, adjective
paragraphically, adverb
Word Origin
C16: from Medieval Latin paragraphus, from Greek paragraphos line drawing attention to part of a text, from paragraphein to write beside, from para- 1 + graphein to write
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Collins English Dictionary – Complete & Unabridged 2012 Digital Edition
© William Collins Sons & Co. Ltd. 1979, 1986 © HarperCollins
Publishers 1998, 2000, 2003, 2005, 2006, 2007, 2009, 2012
Cite This Source
Word Origin and History for paragraph
n.

late 15c., from Middle French paragraphe “division of text” (13c., Old French paragrafe), from Medieval Latin paragraphus “sign for start of a new section of discourse” (the sign looked something like a stylized letter -P-),from Greek paragraphos “short stroke in the margin marking a break insense,” also “a passage so marked,” literally “anything written beside,”from paragraphein “write by the side,” from para- “beside” (see para- (1))+ graphein “to write” (see -graphy ).

Minimise your wardrobe:my unattainable desire

If you have no car  then you need a warm coat in most countries in Northern Europe or the USA.This may cause you to faint in over-heated shops.So don’t go into big shops and get groceries on-line.Otherwise get a coat you can take off and fold up.It may have to be a dressing gown!My husband once went shopping in his for a dare.

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If you choose the right fabric many clothes are wearable  all the year round in theory

HINTS:layer

Needle-cord trousers/skirts are versatile year round
Jeans can be too hot in summer but chinos are ok
Denim sleeveless dresses.With/without polo-neck underneath
Cotton sweaters.
Trenchcoat
Sandals suitable for evening or beach e.g .Gold/silver.
Shoes with high front are warmer and more supportive.
Denim wide brimmed  hat.Can be a sun hat
Cotton/ silk scarves.
T shirts in basic colours.
Cotton socks
Long nightdresses can be summer dresses but may be transparent.

SLEEPWEAR

sleep nude
sleep in cat basket
sleep in partner#s pyjamas,arms,pillowcase
sleep in underwear
sleep in petticoat
sleep in tracksuit
sleep fully dressed to get off to a quick,sweaty start [get a deodorant,it’s cheaper than pyjamas]

Stan and the gooseberries

A cat from england
A ca
Poppies in england
  • After Mary went off to the Oxfam shop with a bag of odd shoes Stan decided to clean his laptop.
    He was trying to open the plastic box of Screen Cleaning Tissues and wondering if he could have used a damp microfibre cloth instead.He was feeling excited because he was going to take Mary away for the weekend to a Pie Museum on the Lincolnshire coast.
    There was a knock on the back door.He saw Lisa
    and Tom,two students from Knittingham University.Tom’s grandmother was a friend of Stan’s.”Hello,”said Tom,”this is Lisa Stoat my girlfriend.””Hello,Lisa.How are you?And where do you come from?”I’m fine,thanks.I believe my mum found me under a gooseberry bush near the A19 to Teesside.She’d been out rambling with the gypsies.Anyway she met my dad when I was 2.He’s doctor   in Stockton.,he adopted me and several other children my mother found from time to time out in the country.There are six of us now.There are lots of gooseberry bushes on Tees-side.”
    “Thank you for that,Lisa.”
    “Please don’t mention it; you are more than welcome!”
    “Would you like some gooseberry pie.”
    “Yes,I’m ravenous.” the girl replied shyly.
    “Well,you know you are a growing girl.” Stan chuntered “I’m afraid I can’t find the cakeforks”
    “That’s a pity,” replied  Tom.”I’ve never seen a cake fork in my life.” “Oh,goodness,”Stan called.”What did you do?”
    “Well,we used a pick axe to cut the pies up and then lay on the floor and grabbed bits with our teeth.!”
    “Where you raised by cats?”Stan cried querulously.
    “To a certain extent,”the boy honestly admitted.”But I can use a knife and fork now for meat and veg and also I can now use a lavatory rather than digging a hole in the soil or using a plant pot.”
    “Have you thought of writing your autobiography?”
    “I feel I’m a bit young for that and the cats, Lucy and Mario, might be offended.”
    “Can they read?” “Not yet but I’m doing phonics with them. the government recommends that according to the News of the Failed.”
    “But not for cats,surely?”
    “Well,you win some you lose some!” Tom answered with the unique and riginal turn of phrase typical of one raised by cats.
    Lisa got over. excited.”You could call it “A tale of two Kittiesb”” she cried hysterically.
    “Oh,my God.Is she bipolar?” Stan thought anxiously.
    “But what would Professor Fittsgenstein think?”
    “I rarely think,” said a man who had crept into the kitchen through the cat flap.”And I have to confess that I too was partially raised by cats.”
    “Welcome.Professor”, they all shouted
    “What a coincidence!”
    “Well,”said Annie, who had been listening through the keyhole,”It’s very common in Knittinghamshire you know.The mortgages are so big,both parents have to work so they have no alternative but to leave the children at home with the cats.They all learn to mioaw which can be useful.” She then gave a loud”mioaw”
    I’d better ring 999 “Stan whispered.”I think she is going mad.”
    “Oh,no” Tom stated,”If you could enter into the narrative of her life and reach the place where she is you would see it all makes perfect sense.”
    “What even the thick layers of makeup and the TKMaxx perfume.” “Yes,indeed.”
    “Didn’t Schopenhauer advise against about pretending to be someone other than your true self?”
    “I’m sorry but we have only reached pi and the Ancient Greeks.Is Philosophy meant to help you with real life problems?”
    “What sort of pie did they eat?”Stan wondered anxiously.
    “I guess maybe apricot or peach,”said Lisa.
    “Well,I have the Fanni Far Mer cookery book here.I’ll look it up.”
    “But she’s American? poor Lisa said peevishly
    “I thought she was a Turk!”
    “What about Gud How Ski Ping?”
    “Yes,I do like the Chinese.”
    Then Stan fell out of bed and landed on the rug.It was 4am.”I blame that cheese pie.” he thought mutinously.
    Read more in the News of the Failed out a week on Sunday

Terza rima sonnet.

Another original creation of Dante, the terza rima sonnet is a rare but superb form that blends four quatrains and a rhyming couplet with a terza rima rhyme scheme. The most noteworthy example is in one of Percy Bysshe Shelley’s most famous poems, “Ode to the West Wind.”

Ode to the West Wind

http://www.poetryfoundation.org/poem/174401 [for the entire poem]

BY PERCY BYSSHE SHELLEY

I
O wild West Wind, thou breath of Autumn’s being,
Thou, from whose unseen presence the leaves dead
Are driven, like ghosts from an enchanter fleeing,
Yellow, and black, and pale, and hectic red,
Pestilence-stricken multitudes: O thou,
Who chariotest to their dark wintry bed
The winged seeds, where they lie cold and low,
Each like a corpse within its grave, until
Thine azure sister of the Spring shall blow
Her clarion o’er the dreaming earth, and fill
(Driving sweet buds like flocks to feed in air)
With living hues and odours plain and hill:
Wild Spirit, which art moving everywhere;
Destroyer and preserver; hear, oh hear!