Day: February 27, 2016

Oaf of the decay

Word of the Day : February 27, 2016 Merriam Webster

oaf

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noun OHF
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Definition

1 : a stupid person

2 : a big clumsy slow-witted person

Examples

In high school Bryan was a big oaf, so we were surprised not only by his refined mien but by his position as CEO of a high-tech company.

“Here is a person dedicated to minimizing the ripple she makes as she passes through the world. She took up such little space, made such little impact, that in comparison I felt like anoaf of consumption, a wasteful giant, lumbering heedlessly through life.” — Rand Richards Cooper, The Commonweal, 8 Jan. 2016

 

Did You Know?

A long time ago in England, it was believed that goblins sometimes secretly exchanged their babies for human babies. This was used as an explanation when parents found themselves with a particularly ugly or deformed child: these parents wanted to believe that their real baby had been stolen by goblins, and the other left in its place. The label for such a child wasauf, or alfe (meaning “goblin’s child”), terms that were later altered to form our present-day oaf. Although the linguistic history is not entirely clear, auf and alfe are likely from the Middle English alven and elven, meaning “elf” or “fairy.” Today the word oaf is no longer associated with unattractive babies and is instead applied to anyone who appears especially unintelligent or graceless.

Back to reality:the way we were and are

I have a Jewish friend who asked me why the Allies did not help the Jews in Europe.It seems not unlike the fear of letting in immigrants now… but worse.And we know Churchill did questionable things like bombing Dresden which had no military reason.In fact if you read the novel Dresden Green  you will find that it was full of refugees.

Dresden Green

by Nicolas Freeling (Author)

Main article: Bermuda Conference

From April 19, 1943 through April 30, 1943, during the Warsaw Ghetto Uprising of 19 April to 16 May, representatives of the governments of the United Kingdom and the United States held an international conference at Hamilton, Bermuda. They discussed the question of Jewish refugees who had been liberated by Allied forces and of those who still remained in Nazi-occupied Europe. The only agreement made was that the war against the Nazis must be won. The US did not raise its immigration quotas and the British prohibition on Jewish refugees seeking refuge in the British Mandate of Palestine remained in place. A week later, the American ZionistCommittee for a Jewish Army ran an advertisement in the New York Times condemning the United States efforts at Bermuda as a mockery of past promises to the Jewish people and of Jewish suffering under German Nazi occupation.[8] Szmul Zygielbojm, a member of the Jewish advisory body to the Polish government-in-exile, committed suicide in protest.[4]

In the night

In the night I saw a black cat cross the floor;

I reached out to stroke him

But my hands passed straight through

I tried again as he ran by the bed

but he felt like pure air.

I’ve never seen you again

Even as a shadow.

But I dream.

 

 

Unreal reality

 

 

Something that is  so common we may not think about it, is an event  liked that  one person claims to love another quite soon after meeting them.Perhaps it’s admiration or lust.Who knows?But most probably they believe that this relative stranger is the person who is going to give them all they need in life.By the way,nobody can give you all you need.

The story is declarations of powerful love,happiness for a few months or a bit longer and then the  END.Because the love was based on projection.The person loved a creation they had made in their imagination.They believe they have found the ONE who embodied this ideal.When they get to know this person it seems  very likely that there will be a gap between the ideal and the real.

Is that the fault of the person who was chosen? Well, it’s a common pattern and flexible people  usually adapt their desires and realise that though not perfect the  loved one is “good enough” or they gently disengage.

.Inflexible people often fiercely  blame the love object for not being the imagined  delight and beauty they   wanted.In fact it seems they were having a relationship with a ghost; with part of their own self and not with an OTHER.Then this other is attacked for being other.

To a lesser or greater extent we all do this in our lives.These imaginings may draw  us to someone.Or falsely deny us even getting to know someone who might be a great friend.

There are so many obstacles in relating to people it’s a wonder we do it at all.Perhaps some people are better at imagining and adapting.And even a gentle break up or letting go is often painful.Sometimes we just give up.

I think nowadays it’s too easy to start relationships without the old patterns of courtship,engagement and marriage.Similarly people may get too friendly too soon and then drop the ” friend” when the find they are utterly different.I remember a man saying to me about a woman he liked a lot:she’s in the BNP[ a racist party].He was shaken.But I knew that she looked very like his sister and so maybe  he imagined unconsciously she would have the same values as his sister did.

I suppose we all have these odd ways of connecting or disconnecting.And it is frequently nothing to do with the actuality of either person.

More frightening is the fact that psychopaths are very charming.Though not all charming people are psychopaths,of course.But it someone has a very powerful charm it may not be a good sign.Someone I know got engaged 2 weeks after meeting a man and ended up divorced and caring for his mother for years, while he ran off with someone else.Speed can be a bad sign…

If we  never learn others are quite different people with different desires,likes and feelings then life is very hard.What I think is  most of us only learn it partially.In a rigid society it may ironically be easier as everything is controlled by rules.In ours it is easy to get into something without ever thinking hard about it.Thankfully true psychopaths are rare but narcissism is increasing.

Syntax is not a sin tax.

Oxford Dictionary

syntax

See definition in Oxford Advanced Learner’s Dictionary

Line breaks: syn¦tax

Pronunciation: /ˈsɪntaks/

Definition of syntax in English:

noun

[MASS NOUN]

1The arrangement of words and phrases to create well-formed sentences in a language:the syntax of English
1.1A set of rules for or an analysis of the syntax of a language:generative syntax
1.2The branch of linguistics that deals with syntax.

2 The structure of statements in a computer language.

Origin

Late 16th century: from French syntaxe, or via late Latin from Greek suntaxis, from sun- ‘together’ +tassein ‘arrange’.

Definition of syntax in:

Synthetic tears

Synthetic tears  don’t benefit the sad,

Whose world is  trembling  after  recent loss.

Real tears may stop many going mad.

Though for the onlookers there is a cost.

 

Yet do not stand by helplessly confused.

Tears and grief are calls for loving arms.

If friendship’s real, we cannot be bemused.

Though in our hearts we may feel strange alarm.

 

 

Fear of grief is worse than grief itself.

Ruminating on our horrors harms

Feeling to the heart of what is here

Softens pain and  so will be a balm.

 

Fear,obsession,inward looking eye,

May cause us to desire  only to die.