One night when I went to bed I was feeling very sad.I had got my kindle and looked here at my blog.After a few moments I burst out laughing.But it seems odd to me because if I wrote it  then I would not get a surprise.I wonder if it comes from a part of the mind we ar not in touch with when doing chores or watching TV because it makes me laugh till I cry sometimes.

I also wonder if some of the things I write are quite childish like games I once played with my brother and sister collecting the names of shops and their owners.I remember a sweet shop  owned by the Towels.We thought it was hilarious.And so maybe my writing is like that some of the time or I am breaking some rule or crossing a boundary.They say laughter is good for the immune system so I shall Carry On.But if you hate it leave it.I don’t mind at all

http://dietadvice.about.com/od/weight-loss-strategies/fl/Beans-for-Weight-Loss-Fact-or-Fiction.htm?utm_content=5577502&utm_medium=email&utm_source=cn_nl&utm_campaign=livinghealthy&utm_term=

This reminded me of when I was very thin.I was on some drugs for arthritis.It did warn that one ingredient could cause miscarriages but it never crossed my mind they could cause diarrhea.Because it was not every day,it was about every week or two.When I changed to another drug it went better but I got fatter.

.After various experiences I do think that many of our feelings and thoughts are caused by biological factors.In 2002 I felt I was losing my mind.I kept phoning the water company we get  our water from  to ask whether the drains were blocked.They were really nice.I was completely  and instantly cured after being diagnosed with an under-active thyroid gland. The low thyroid seemed  to magnify my reactions,so  my slightly damaging a new window frame made me sob with agonising grief.That makes me wonder how many people with so called mental disorders have got a physical disease.And  in our  NHS now ,they check less and waste money on wrong treatments.So if you go for day surgery ask them to listen to your heart.They won’t unless you ask.[As with my husband: he was seriously ill but the GP had not noticed  or checked]

Who the devil are you?

You!

“People often avoid making decisions out of fear of making a mistake. Actually the failure to make decisions is one of life’s biggest mistakes.” – Rabbi Noah Weinberg.

When you are far, so far away,

The longest night,

The shortest day,

will be places where I might die.

The heart’s interior, no-one else can view.

When you are lost, I cannot find your face…

Its outline on the pillows,

My fingers shaped to trace.

The new design, the stellar rhyme,

Where have you gone?

You slipped out of my arms.

You slipped away

Was night or day

Ever cut by such a narrow line?

In your embrace I lay.

You seemed so strong.

Yet,sighing, took the path away.

I can’t see to  where

Is it night? Or is it day..?

I tried to write to bring  more light,.

It’s dark, and still.

I long for your return

Oh,will we ever quite

Find out  the way?

Or is that an illusion?

As we stagger through

the wandering furrows in the fields

They shoot us down.

What is this confusion?

The war goes on

The world goes round

The mirror gapes at each new clown

In  cracked earth, a seed may grow.

But you are gone and  will not know.

Will not to know

1.When you think of what to wear to bed,remember Cherie Blair’s nightie… on her first day in  number 10?

So,always wear nightclothes in which you can open the door without revealing all.How about cutting two holes in a sleeping bag for your feet? Then you would need less bedding and would be ready for any early bird delivering your Amazon order of Sylvia Plath’s Letters or enough shampoo  to last for a year.The only drawback is your partner might object.So how about a  long fleece nightgown over a silk petticoat?Get a dressing gown with a tie belt not a zip.Or keep a big towel by the door.

2.You only live once so live longer by wearing safe clothing…. make sure it is possible to move in it as on the whole we move especially in the day time.Don’t wear lycra underwear as it’s bad for the skin… of the lycra which is a lovely animal that lives in Malaysia in the jungle.

Frozen Lycra

3. For economy you might wear the new clothes your late partner left behind.I find woollen vests over a nightdress look strange but are really warm and  some cotton singlets are long enough to be mini dresses..if dyed they look stunning.So I believe and I can’t see into the long mirror so I will carry on regardless.For men it’s more difficult unless you wear a dress in bed and  inform the postman you are transgender.It hs nothing to do with him  anyway but you might be lucky.

4 If you wear too many layers you will look fatter.

5 If you wear leggings wear a tunic or your boyfriend’s pyjama jacket.If you are  a  man wear trousers!

6.Wear long boots so if you have no socks you will still be warm.Wear some clothes as well.

7 If your tights fall down  don’t fall over.It’s Fall

8 Get used to pockets.. wear a man’s jacket.But remember if caught you may go to jail.

9 Wear a wig and cut down hairdresser’s bills.You may need to convert to Judaism  but there may be advantages.Like men do all the praying and also a little preying too.God made men that way.And don’t they love it!

10 Hats are very warm but spoil one’s hairstyle.Try cutting off all  your hair at the socket and that will solve it and cure depression too.Free shocks!

11 That’s all I can think of  apart from emigrating

Be well conducted

• At the end of the fray with the top hogs
• We sat on the  tracks
•  drinking from the flask of the maters.
• There were more than a few  present and a spar between men and   numen broke out
• But we  got an actual  devil praying on the field on this day of  rage.
•  He was incensed and purposeful
•  but all’s said  on the run in the tonal paralysis of the dumb
• A running   bull circles a  large jar for the corpse of the Christ
• We must think besides and ignore a voice like an angel’s
• In the current crisis bake no cakes or funeral meats
•  The mass  pester  and fuss at this  foaming  tide as it covers the path of  the least  condemned again
• I shall stick out like an adored nun; as thick as a fried  parrot’s egg on toast
• We  observe  a a baptism of  liars
• But it’s  all for a purpose
•  For on any day  love may be born again.
• And so pray all of us.
• And all the others who don’t know as yet.

Does our  belief make the Lord God exist?

Do killings  make our minds resist?

The evidence is nebulous

The Bishop is incredulous.

Yet in his job he will , without doubt, persist.

Six million dead  gypsies and Jews

Did not cause him to question his views.

But he once lived in Paris

And so he is harassed

By the recent  and ominous news.

In a similar fashion might I say,

God doesn’t exist ,though I prayed.

My husband has died

And my sister beside.

So my thoughts about God are well,grave.

If God does  exist ,he is there

Regardless of how we each fare.

As far as the nebulae are

Further is he  by far.

But to say he is dead,I don’t care.

The trees stretch silver branches
In the late November sun ,
The robin perched there watches
As we offer him our crumbs.
The elegance of shapes laid bare
Forgives the winter cold.
And slantwise sunrays clearly
Light the embers of my soul.
Soon the pale white moon will come
To drive  the sun away.
So let us open wide our eyes
To see this winter day.
 Peacefully  the world rotates, 
Unknowing of our fate.