No joking.

How to trip gracefully

How to fall over backwards.

How to slide away sideways.

How to give up.

How to throw up.

How to throw it all up.

No through way.

No exit.

No entrance

No entrancement.

No magic.

No spells.

No miracles.

No ghosts permitted unless smoking.

Kindly turn off at the tip when leaving.

No drips for the  impatient.

No spitting.

No spite allowed.

No splitting.

No bleeding on the rug.

No oozing.

No dying except by prior arrangement.

Ask God.

He knows it all.

The fall.