Day: January 22, 2012

The Hypermobility Syndrome Association • View topic – two more knee operations, a long nervous wait!

Almost the start of July

  • There’s many a true word spoken but not heard.
    We must love one more time!
    May I scalp your fleece?
    I’m getting buried again in the morning.
    I was reborn in Jesus’ tribe..I’m Jewish now and I’m ok.
    Two writes make for much better poems.
    They tell me that London is quite full of spite… or is it spice?
    So you want the moon to play with,and that man to run away with
  • .Try a lady next time..more luck there!
    Ride on the sea,the whale is very kind.
    We wish you a fairy Christmas and a very gay Year.
    Happy worth day to you,self love is quite free.
    Don’t take such a big feel of me
    On the seventh day, God jested.
    God messed up.
    God feasted.
    God sussed us.
    God confessed it.
    God,I missed him….
    God invested….in us
  • Gold stone from Cotswold quarries men brought
    And built into a way of life for those who bought
    Their lives so cheaply,And did not see
    The children’s eyes,the ball,the game,the tree
    Of life that grew in small backyards and gave all
    To those who climbed into its arms.
    Why should this not be you?
    Oh,Eden,I see that you are nearer now
    In lowly homes where love is free
    Than in the temple, grove,and soft set brow
    Of those who worship God in churches built of gold.
    Now we can see that this is easy to recall
    When sun is setting,and escapes the ashes
    Thrown up and floating in the watches
    Of the days of voter’s eyes cast up to skies,
    and wondering fearful, what will come
    when all the secret deals are done.
    Photo1437
    So take the gold of life and let it fall
    Into your children’ s growing souls;
    And let this Cotswold town and spires

  • A man in North London was attacked by a War Memorial.Wife asks if it can be replaced by a Joy Memorial made of rubber.
    She says,He was having a quiet amble across the village green when the War Memorial reared up and struck him on the head…is it linked to the Floods we are suffering from…?
    Now his wife is going up with a towel to see if she can wash him down as after 25 hours in hospital he has not been given any washes …not even water colour washes…
    Man pleads for soap and water… read more tomorrow…in the Daily Smile.What next………. shampoo,anyone?Foot washing as in the Holy Bobble.. You read it here or not at all..
    Fleece be with you.
    Flocks… can you abide them?
    Sheep.. flock for peace.
    Sheep’s milk cheese… protein with taste from Wensleydale.
    He shall feed his flock except those in A and E!
    Let his grace into your cracks.
    Heal the abiding way.
    You will know true sense when you feel his finger touching you.

  • Stan was washing the car while his wife Mary packed a picnic basket.He was already feeling very hot
    even bothered.Emile his cat and friend was sitting on the wall over seeing the car wash.
    Would you like to come,Emile?
    Stan murmured/l
    Yes,I’d love too but what can I eat?
    How about a tin of sardines?
    Do they have those little keys on the side?I find them hard to open.
    So it was you,Emile!I thought Mary must have sleep walked and tried to open a tin.If you get good at all these tasks nothing will be safe!
    I tried to open that tin of gooseberries.
    You must be a fool,Emile!Why gooseberries?
    They looked so nice but they were full of pips.
    Tinned gooseberries are not so tasty except made into a jelly.
    Can we take some jelly on the picnic?
    Well,it would be lovely but it might melt!
    OK I’ll settle for a tin of sardines,the cat mewed politely.
    I’ll have a gooseberry yoghurt instead.
    Since when did cats have puddings,Emile?
    I always envied you,so I thought I’d ask.
    Why,you are almost human,Emile.Next you’ll want a suit and some brogues.
    I’d prefer sandals,responded the striped cat.
    Why is that,my dear,Stan asked lovingly.
    So I can still scratch people or milk them when on their laps.
    You naughty cat!You”ll have to give up scratching if you want to become more moral.
    But what is a cat without a scratch?
    What is a wasp without it’s sting?
    What is a woman without a mood?
    What is a man without……………..
    Have you finished,Stan? called Mary,thus preventing the author from revealing what Stan thought was masculine!
    Yes,my dear.I just need a rug for Emile to sit on …or how about this old tablecloth?
    That’s my new apron!
    New..it looks as if you’ve cleaned Buckingham Palace including the chimneys!
    That just shows you how hard women work and to think I could have been working on my new book
    “Wittgenstein’s Hats!”
    I didn’t know about that, Stan said in a puzzled voice.
    Well,I’ve done four on his cats……… so..
    Did he wear a hat?
    That is the problem.Although Jewish he was raised as a Catholic in Vienna.And Catholic men take off their hats in church.
    Well,that is politeness.
    Yes,but Jewish men must wear a hat all the time.It’s part of their code.It shows respect for God.
    Do they wear a hat in bed?
    I believe not as it could drop off and frighten somebody.
    Well,tell me more about the book.
    It’s obvious to me that the source of much of Wittgenstein’s severe anxiety and guilt
    was his conflict whether/when to wear a hat.
    Did he solve it?
    I have evidence to show he wore a night cap!I have photographs.
    Where did you get those from?
    Well……….I have friends……..And without photos the book would not sell.
    How about cartoons,mewed Emile.
    Graphic novels are the in thing now.
    Good idea,I’ll think about it.
    My goodness it’s 8 pm..we’ve talked so long it’s too late to go out.
    How about eating the picnic in the garden?
    so they went through the side gate into the leafy garden where Emile ate sardines and pilchards and Stan and Mary ate sandwiches and strawberry trifle.
    Then Mary got a sketch pad and drew a few pictures of Wittgenstein in bed with four cats and all of
    them wore nightcaps and the philosopher was also drinking a nightcap of Scottish whiskey.
    A little smile came on her face…
    I like this,she cried merrily-
    Thank you,Emile.
  • An angel was near you today
    I saw her but I couldn’t say.
    You were tied up in a network of thought
    On the blackberry you had just bought.
    An angel was near you today
    But your mind was too faraway.
    You didn’t see her beautiful light
    For your eyes were entranced by tech sites,
    If we could temper our cybernetic romance,
    And we weren’t so electronically entranced,
    If we could all look up together just once,
    Our angels would teach us to dance
  • You are my golden buttercup.
    I love you all day long.
    And as I walk around the town
    I burst out into song.
    You are my heart’s delight
    You are my joy.
    You are my man now…
    Let’s love and say a prayer
  • The Veil Of Isolation
    Isolation vs. Interaction: A conscious choice?
    By Carol Eustice, About.com Guide
    Updated March 05, 2004
    About.com Health’s Disease and Condition content is reviewed by the Medical Review Board
    Chronic arthritis…..a disease characterized by pain, limitation, and loss…..a disease which impacts a person physically, emotionally, and socially.
    Much has been written about the physical impact of chronic arthritis and resulting loss of ability. The emotional impact has even been analyzed. Denial, anger, fear, and feelings of hopelessness are among the emotions which can accumulate and implode within the chronic arthritis sufferer. Add to the mix friends and family who do not understand the emotional turmoil and the result can be increasing levels of social isolation. Consider the following scenarios:
    *A friend asks you to go to the shopping mall for a day of shopping. The friend does not realize that the pain from your arthritis will force the shopping trip to end prematurely.
    *You are invited to a party but you know the fatigue from your arthritis will make it necessary to end the evening early.
    *At the party there will be alcoholic beverages. The question, “Why aren’t you drinking?”, will flow like the drinks, leaving you to feel singled-out.
    *You want to see the hottest movie in the theaters, but it is very difficult to get up from the seats after sitting for 2 or 3 hours.
    *At your family reunion, activities such as softball and volleyball are planned. As everyone else digs in for the competition, you are sidelined.
    *You plan a trip with friends or family but the sightseeing schedule will leave you way behind.
    *A new friend invites you over for dinner but you are apprehensive because you are unfamiliar with the friends home and you fear the number of steps and furniture that might challenge you.
    *You would like to invite people to your home but feel your housekeeping has been sub-par and it discourages you.
    *After taking the children to the amusement park, you find the rides are inaccessible for you. This leaves you in a “waiting mode” all day rather than a “sharing mode”.
    *You can no longer continue to work. Leaving your job causes you to lose the social interaction you enjoyed with co-workers.
    *The financial loss caused by expensive medical care depletes the allotment for entertainment.
    *Going out in public armed with canes, wheelchairs, and handicap parking placards provokes stares and gawking.
    Do any of these situations seem familiar? This is a short list of difficulties which can confront people with chronic arthritis. Obviously the length of time you have had arthritis and the severity of your condition make the cycle between physical, emotional, and social impact even more complicated. It is apparent that these situations lead to feelings of guilt and uneasiness. As you experience more and more uncomfortable moments, it is human nature to want to shield yourself. Avoiding social interaction becomes a choice, and the result of that choice is isolation.
    Choosing isolation over social interaction means you can avoid feelings of guilt over holding others back. It means you can avoid feeling that you have failed to meet other peoples expectations of you. It means you won’t have to ask for help or you won’t have to feel “different”.
    Think about it for a moment though. Doesn’t isolation just enhance other bad feelings such as low self-esteem, depression, and unworthiness? If you succumb to a world of isolation, doesn’t it mean that arthritis is controlling you rather than you controlling your arthritis?
    Isn’t it more satisfying to work to make people understand what life is like for you within your boundaries of limited ability? Isn’t it better for you to learn to live within your boundaries and not continually strive to attain other peoples level of normalcy? Isn’t it better to focus on what you can do, not what you cannot do? Please take your answers to these questions to th

  • I was shocked into this diatribe by seeing a hamburger win the Olympics.
    We were joined by the Whip… with some cuffs.
    A life time of at least ten thousand troubles began with the first quip!
    I like to float on his boat while he has a dip in the river
    I can’t respond yet.My fury is still out.
    Just a minuet and I’ll be free.
    I fell off the truck and my wife fell off the wagon.So we are well mixed now.
    Why is justice so often fierce?
    Have you any quips in mind?
    You seem very mal-ou-drat tonight.
    Tension is relieved by messages along the nerves.
    If I crack up please keep the pieces until God sends a pot of glue to mend me…

  • I was wandering all through the town
    When I saw the bright eyes of a clown.
    I fell into his arms
    Without any qualms,
    And now we’re going up to lie down,

    Life in my body

    I went to the dentist today
    He found I’d a cat in my cavity.
    Poor pussy was hiding in there…
    Well,no way you can call it depravity,The doctor found a mouse in my ear..
    He was much puzzled by my hilarity.
    He gave it a piece of his cheese.
    Should cats and mice now have parity?When I gave my nose a big blow
    A hornet came out wildly buzzing.
    So now I am off to the zoo
    to see if I can catch something more p
  • Loose in the fields of green…
    Oh, my own lover!
    He was such a bold flirt;
    with his love unclaimed,
    he could recite George Boole
    he was one of the old Cool.
    He never reached his goal.
    so with my bling and some flair
    I hoped he’d open the enchanted bud
    To the music of his lyre.
    I’ll pray this for him:
    t hat he should find what he wreaks
    and write it down with a stylus.
    Really he is the allurement of angels
    He was my epiphany
    Make it up, as the clocks clang..
    It’s not really you…it’s just an affliction.
    I can do nothing for my calves
    It’s because of all the punning I did once.
    I can’t even lump a stone over a wall now.
    My arms are as weak as Trojans.
    I never suffer viruses to be declassified.
    Like I said,just wink and say a prayer..
    In God we dare.

    I love your eyes

    I feel so happy when you’re near.
    Seems like love can cast out fear.
    The world looks brighter and more clear,so
    Down the avenues of life we go.
    I love your eyes and how you feel.
    I’m like an orange you unpeel.
    And when I’m naked I will be real.
    for then my soul will be revealed.
    When we lie together on the bed
    after all disguises are shed
    I see your soul shine through your face
    As I offer myself to your embrace.
  • The way you can lose weight quickly is to have a nervous breakdown.
    When that happens you will lose your appetite and also you will wring your hands and keep running about uneasily.This helps to burn off the fat.You will find it hard to swallow but that will help too.
    You can live on liquids for a few weeks…
    And when you recover,see the light, and control your appetite…
    If you can’t manage a total breakdown try severe worry instead,especially worry about food,additives,chemicalsm= etc.Worry about the sun…too much or too little.Worry that you have BO..or bad breath.
    Pretend a tiger is chasing you and ON NO ACCOUNT RELAX OR SLEEP
    That will help as you can clean the house all night and work all day.
    If you are too lazy to crack up then just crack on as normal.

    No,I’ll never love again,not whenever

    Her hands are all wavy,her nose runs all day and her feet tweet nonstop.Is it the New Exercise?
    I made a witch profit by teaching her doubt.
    At least tantalize me till it’s light
    At last, abreast for the I’s.Level at last
    He gave me a laugh and sinful emotions.
    He kept me mating far too long.
    Then he laughed all the way to the bonk
    I play down in the bar
    I pray for more catarrh
    I generally lay my bards on the table
    l left my mark on his back.. scratched again!
    I leave no home unconsumed.I’m just a devil in my own lifetime
    I was left at his falter.
    She’s a legend so well defined…she’s never out of her own mind
    A gun brings me out in spots…when they hit me.
    It was the fleeter of my two feet which arrived at the finishing post.I’ll catch up with it later.Is that a crutch or are you limping to meet me?
    Will they make my groans into migraines?
    Let sloping fogs lie freely over all the elastic lands.
    I let the flat out to an old hag.She had bags under her eyes and a broomstick under her charms.
    Is that a crutch I see before I wee.
    Let’s never poll again.
    I’ll never be a dove again.No,I’ll never write a double negative for you.No not ever
    She said,let’s spit now..but I refused,so she bit!
    His blinkers are perfect.His winks are a pleasure to behold.
    Let’s love again before the next millenium..
    You keep me mating all of the time.What did I do?
    Was it my song?
  • You are adorable you are so Other
    And yet you remind me mysteriously
    Of my mother!
    You are so sweet,you are so offbeat,
    You dress so neat;
    And you don’t eat meat.
    Or bulgur wheat,
    You seem to have excess conceit,
    about your
    skills as a writer of Fleet Street
    type stories
    and mix with all the wrong folk
    and you are no good at small talk,
    Though you have eyes like a hawk.
    No chance of me hiding
    My secrets anymore,
    Yet though I adore
    Your piercing gaze.
    I need to have my face double glazed.
    I love how your lineaments were made,
    do you fancy me,
    Or wish to get laid?
    I’d be more than happy
    to oblige
    In any way I can.
    You see, I am a man,
    and this is my home.
    My bed is made from thick foam
    Rubber,It’s very wide
    so plenty of room for both of us
    Inside the covers,
    Or space to hide!
    Are you very shy?You never speak.
    I’m just going to
    Take a leak.
    I beg your pardon for my rude word.
    Ladies should be spared
    I should say,may I use the bathroom?
    But as it’s my own bathroom
    I was not thinking.
    You beauty has made me start blinking,
    I think I’m going to wet myself soon.
    How the hell can I get out of this room?
    Now I’m getting ruder and ruder.
    Excuse me,miss.
    I’d love to kiss
    But I need the loo,
    Or I don’t know what I shall do!
    I’m too polite.
    I need to assert myself tonight.
    I need to pee.
    You see
    You and me
    We are similar
    And no doubt sometimes
    You want to go
    When it’s inconvenient socially.
    A penny is money well spent.
    Though it’s more expensive on Euston
    Station.
    Oh my God!I can’t keep waiting.
    I have to go,goodbye.
    I like your eye
    S and your lips.I
    Drank too much cider
    and it affects my kidneys inside
    Me.
    Cider is deadly for people
    with weak bladders
    And men who need to climb ladders
    May get drunk and fall off.
    Don’t make me laugh!
    I’m just going out for a few minutes now.
    I don’t want to offend you or that old cow.
    Please let me go.
    I love you so.
    but now my main concern
    Is not finding a home for millions of my sperm.
    Oh,for God’s sake!
    I’m going off to take that leak.
    And when I come back,
    Please speak!
    Or emit a few squeaks

  • Down yonder dark valley,where bankers meander
    On dark grey cracked pavements I ruminating roam;
    Or in the bright moonlight,I pensively wander
    For once this here City was my native home..
    But now I’m a tramp and sleep on a gravestone.
    I have nothing left but this carrier bag.
    I get food from the convent
    And eat on the pavement
    And soon I am hoping to write a tramp’s blog.
    I had a netbook and now I’ve bought a dongle
    I’m keeping some notes on the politics game.
    I’ve got a nokia camera
    On permanent loan
    So I snap all these bankers,
    [truly they are wankers ]
    I hope I can tease them until they all moan.
    I love my little dongle
    As around graveyards I stumble
    It keep sme in touch with the whole wide world
    And if I sometimes caress it,
    It’s only to check it……
    And to make sure I’m not turning into a girl!
  • I am looking back at the 20th century and the beginning of the 21st
    and reading Gitta Sereny and Barabara Tuchmann and I just thought
    On the seventh day God rested.
    Maybe this is that day.He’s on sabbatical.
    But then I look further back at the Crusades and I think
    On the seventh day, should God have been ARRESTED?
    Blake saw infinity in a grain of sand…and eternity in the shower
    I want to break into song.. will you come along?
    I want to take a peek at your preek
    Please make fish walk into the sea one by one.No coupling by order.
    Now,take hold of my outstretched hands and fly into the bright
    He blocked a stoned banker from entering the cafe de la mare
    Please look after your witticisms..My writs can take care of your selves.
    Won’t you take it wheezy?Or Shall I be more greasy?
    Shake it from me…I’ll define pain no more
    Take me to the limits of the defined.Extremity is my piano d’accord.
    Oh,forte.O mores!Temerity is torment.
    Lakes are friendlier, bigger streams.
    He faked a cock up and lost the balls.What a blot!
    I’ll take a mull in the hawthorn’s vest.
    Wimps and shepherds come all day.
    My mind blew over with slow notions.
    Take me to your blouson.
    Take me to Google Reader.
    Let Google Docs iron your frocks.
    A Doc a day keeps Apple away!
    Are you a scholar with a dollar?
  • Did you ever have a lover
    with long red hair?
    For long red hair
    seems too unfair.
    Did you ever have a lover
    and then another lover?
    For there’s added gain
    if you feel no pain.
    Did you ever have a lover
    who loved your eyes
    and never ever lied,
    and let you cry?
    Whatever was the trouble.
    You’ll never have a lover.
    if you have no time for others
    for love needs care,
    say,what is here.
    Here and there are many lovely people
    who live with their lives with scruples;
    if you’re scruple free,
    then let it be.
    Oh,let it be is fine,
    Except for the divine.
    I want to be involved
    For I can’t please all the folk,
    Who touch me with their talk.
    My heart has melted down…
    and now I’ve grown a world
    completely on my own.
    Were you ever quite alone
    Like a toad under a stone?
    Did you ever hear a groan
    as you wrote your poem?
    For you’ll never write a poem
    that makes me laugh..
    Because my feet are in the shower
    but my body’s in the bath.
    My head is on the shelf…
    and I’ve lost all of my stealth…
    Yet you will love me
    Evermore.
    Evermore and evermore
    You’ll be standing on the shore
    Watching the horizon,
    wondering what she lies on.
    Oh,you’ll never be a poet,
    Unless you learn your notes..
    They take you to the limit…..
    Love.whatever is it?
    Evermore ,evermore…
    The words seem like a roar…
    I love your heart’s deep core.
    Ever more and ever more.

  • Stan was happy for a few moments when he woke up.Then he realized Emile
    was not anywhere to be seen.Mary,his wife, had already gone out as she wanted to catch a very early train to London.She needed to visit the British Library.She urgently wanted to find evidence that Wittgenstein wore a hat in bed as this was an important idea in her new study “Wittgenstein ,guilt and hats.. a new theory”
    Stan went searching around the house but Emile had vanished.Usually at 8 am he would be dashing about pretending to chase flies and giving a balletic performance worthy of Sadler’s Wells…
    I wonder who Sadler was,Stan muttered as he filled the kettle with fresh cold water and put some Earl Grey tea into the teapot.
    Then, a strange,uncanny feeling came over him.He looked up and there was Emile crouched on top of the highest cupboard in the kitchen.
    Emile,he cried,What are you doing up there?
    I’m training to be a spy,Emile replied nonchalantly.
    But how could this kitchen be of interest to the Intelligence Services?
    Well,the cat murmured,I am practising hiding.Hiding is very useful.
    You gave me a terrible shock,Stan said.I had this feeling I was being watched.I wondered if it was paranoia.Then I saw your gleaming eyes.
    So,I need to get some dark glasses,Emile whispered.
    No,I would still feel that horrible feeling…. someone is staring at me.And how were you planning to get down from that high ledge?
    I’m not sure,the cat mioawed faintly
    Well,the first lesson for a spy or even a detective is,
    Never go anywhere unless you can make a quick exit,
    As it is,I may have to ring 999.
    Just then the front doorbell rang.There stood a man with a white beard and moustache.
    Hello,he said holding out his hand in a pleasant manner to shake Stan’s. hand
    I am called Peter Fried.I have just moved into one of the new flats across the road.I am a psychoanalyst.I have taken on another flat to use as a consulting room and a waiting room
    A psychoanalyst! Do we need one round here? Well,Good morning,I have just brewed some tea.Would you like to join me?
    How kind,said Peter.
    I say,old bean,did you know there’s a cat on top of your cupboard?
    Yes,that is Emile.Today he has surpassed himself in wickedness.How I will get him down I don’t know.
    My training analyst used to say,What goes up must eventually come down.
    That seems a bit weird for an analyst.To what was he referring… something to do with sex I don’t doubt.It’s all sex with you people.
    Yes, some of us are very peculiar…that’s why we enter the profession.
    What I meant was,if Emile got up he can get down.How did you get up,Emile?
    I leaped,answered the tense animal.
    Can you leap down?
    I’ve lost my nerve,replied the poor creature pathetically
    Well, as it happens,being a therapist,I always carry few spare nerves with me.I’ll climb up this stepladder and throw you a new nerve.
    And without waiting,Peter climbed the ladder.He put his hand into his pocket and pulled out a golden thread.
    Here you are,Emile,Catch this in your claw.
    Emile caught the golden thread and wrapped it around his neck.
    Can you leap down now? enquired Stan.
    Emile leaped down and landed with a splash in a bowl of hot soapy water in the sink.
    It’s a good thing I wasn’t making chips,laughed Stan anxiously
    Come here,Emile and let me dry you on this old towel.He put Emile
    in front of the fire and he and Peter drank mugs of Earl Grey tea.
    I have got a mistress,Stan told Peter.
    Why tell me? Do you want  to have therapy for your inner conflicts?
    Oh,no.I’m far too old for therapy or indeed for a mistress.I was wondering of you would perhaps be interested …she just likes to spend a little time with an intriguing man.. talking, drawing graphs, interpreting data,making tea,calling the ambulance.. you know…she is most charming and intelligent company. When I give lectures on Statistics and Modern society she organises all the rooms and the chairs and so on..She likes our paramedic,Dave.and is always sending for him to mend chairs and open tins.
    Is she not married?
    No,her husband fell into the wheelie bin during the night and alas he was taken away with the rubbish.
    That is a strange story.Are you certain it happened?
    No,it could be he grew tired of her and ran away.Then she invented this story,
    Well,this may be a quiet suburb but I can see there is plenty of material here for me to write my next book:
    “Deceptive appearances and the fascination of apparent dullness.”
    Oh,that sounds very unusual….please lend me a copy.
    Well,I’ve never believed in true dullness.There is always a story hidden in every house and home.
    See,I’ve just met you a man of 98 yet you have a wife, a mistress and a crazy cat.. and I’ve only been here for one day.Imagine what else I may discover here. after a few weeks
    They heard a siren.
    Oh,no!We’ve not even rung 999 and here is the ambulance…. Mary will be so angry..You see Dave is bisexual.
    My goodness,are you having an affair with him. as well?
    No way,shouted Stan.My life is tough enough already.He can be bisexual or even trisexual but I’m not interested.
    What does trisexual mean,enquired Emile.
    I have no idea but I thought it sounded good,admitted Stan.
    Peter stood up.
    I think I’d better go home and start to see my patients.It may calm me down.
    Now .goodbye,Emile,Put your nerve somewhere safe.We don’t want you to lose it again.
    Thank you,darling cried Emile.I think I’ve formed an erotic transference with you already.
    Peter rushed out in terror.
    Is it me or is it them?he wondered.
    I thought it would be quiet here on the edge of Knittingham but I think now wherever you are there will always be something unexpected happening.But I hope Emile will not begin to follow me around.I shall have to buy a lady cat and then Emile might fall in love with her instead.So off Peter went whistling a Bach cello suite and wondering how to cope with life in a suburb.. clearly it was not as dull as he had imagined.Dullness… does it exist or was it merely invented?

    Where tadpoles mioaw

    He wanted to be publicly logged.
    Logged on?
    Anyway he was dogged by misfortune.
    Don’t be sad… he was a masochist at heart.
    That’s a blessing…
    Is it a sin to enjoy pain?
    No pain, no flame.
    Hell snaps at their heels…
    I wonder how that feels?
    It keeps one slim…..running for your life.
    I was running from my wife!
    Did she catch you?
    Yes,she caught me with a net.
    What sort of net?
    As I’m famed for my fondness for flowers she used a hairnet.
    So you were caught supping nectar?
    Yes,it was like honey to me.
    What happened next?
    She kept me in a birdcage for a year…but the birds hated it so she set me free.
    So here you are,fancy free.
    Well free,anyway..I still have my fancies.
    Say no more.
    No more!I’m saved.
    Saved by the well..
    The one where the frogs sang all night?
    Yes,Jesus liked frogs you know.
    We used to sing,
    The Lord’s my leopard,I’ll not chant.
    He makes me frown and lie.
    By wells of frogs,he leadeth me
    The tadpoles all do cry.
    M
  • Who has never felt grief,
    When a small gesture would have helped
    but it has,unknowingly,been withheld?
    How many people have the imagination
    to guess what’s in your mind,
    And to embrace you rather than push you away
    No-one.No-one.No-one knows.
    No-one knows these numbers.
    No-one knows these names.
    No-one knows how many feel so diffident,
    Nor how many feel shame.
    Being alive is joyful!
    Being alive is pain!
    Being alive is all we have,
    We’ll never be alive again.
    I look into your eyes today
    I sense your shame and woe.
    I look into your eyes just now
    And tell you that I know,
    Being alive is lonely.
    Being alive is good.
    Being alive is pain indeed
    For flesh is not like wood.

    Can I put a word in your beer,dear

  • My head came loose as I rode on a merrygoround.I feel better without it.
    Keep a bad man in your room and leave the good ones full of gloom.
    My eyes keep falling onto you…Can you lend me your arms?
    Can you keep it down for a bit?
    Keep the wimple on,Cupid
    I keep mathematics at bay all day..I’m counting on your aid..
    Stop those flies opening the windows…. get an apple mac.
    Keep your hair on.Shaving is ungracious to your Creator.
    Keep your powder dry..but your lipstick moist.
    Keeping up with the Tones,the Shades ,the Hues.Why is life such an art?
    He used to keep a bird closeby..but she flew off with all his money
    My heart keeps on ticking..when will I have to get up?When it stops?
    You lick me and I’ll lie here longer…I need a thorough wash..bring two cats next time…they will know what to do.
    Why did she hit those herbs? She forgot the rosemary……Crikey.
    What happens if she forgets the beef…watch out,you cow.
    If we all kick at once,the earth might give birth to a new day.
    He went out one day and fell into a book.When he woke up he was a professor in a circus.He could ride those horses as if he were born to it the, without a thought in his head,he would talk for an hour.It was a but like the marriage feast at… you know….wine,women ans Bong!
  • P

    My husband is very kind.He lifts up his feet when I am hoovering the floor…
    Mine is nice too…he made me a cup of tea once.I still remember..even after 40 years.
    My husband washes up when we have a takeaway.
    Mine does after we have fish and chips.
    My husband folds up the sheets.
    When?
    When the newspaper gets creased.
    My husband cleans the bath with a brillo pad.
    Is it a tin bath?
    My husband never cleans his pipe….
    Smoke gets in your eyes,smoke gets in your eyes….
    Did you ever have a brief encounter?
    No,but I lost all my briefs.
    You should take legal advice.
    Knickers!
    My dad rolled his own cigarettes.
    Down yonder hill?
    My Mum used cigarettes to curl her hair..
    I loved the warm atmosphere in your house.

  • The line of your lips
    The line of your lips is finely made,
    as suffering accepted has transmuted pain
    into a sculptor who
    has given you much beauty;
    yet the pain has shaped too
    the eyes setting,
    as if a slight question waits
    in the back of your mind
    asking,is this right?
    and I perceive this and how you may suddenly tremble
    with a memory too piercing;
    yet how you love
    the world so broken,
    so humane
    so vulnerable
    so strong.
    what are you saying to me?
    I gather you ask me this of me:
    Tell me it’s good to be alive.

  • Pray Father,give me your blessing.It’s six feats since my last Compulsion.
    What have you done now,my child.
    I have washed all my unclean linen in public.
    I suggest buying a washing machine.
    You don’t understand,Father,I am speaking metaphorically.
    Well,if you’ve already revealed it in public,you have no need to confess here.
    I wanted absolution
    Well,we all have dirty linen.It’s the nature of life.
    Yes, we just finish rinsing one lot and the next is there.
    where did you reveal all?
    In the market square.
    And what response did you get,my child?
    A man called,Your sins aren’t very original!
    No sin is entirely original though I think the Banks are giving it their best shot.
    Now,Father,you must avoid cliches!
    What,even in here?
    I find once I use one cliche,I get caught up in a vicious spiral.
    Yes,it’s like adultery.you think once won’t matter but after having unlawful congress with one person,it doesn’t seem to matter how many more you have.
    You can’t commit adultery,Father!
    Why not?
    Well,you’re not married,are you?
    No,you are quite right.I was just using my imagination.
    I quite understand,Father.I was like that once.Now I just have compulsive washing problems instead.
    What do you wash?
    You name it,I’ve washed it!
    How about the heart?
    That’s when we need God.
    What,God the Washer of All?
    HYMN OF THE DAY
    Come down,Oh,Wash divine.
    Clean this grey heart of mine,
    And Kindle it with thine own Amazon password.
    Oh,Cleanser,draw reak near,
    and make stains disappear.
    And subscribe me to those Websites that I’ve heard
    of.
    Thanks so much.I really enjoyed that.And for your penance you mustnot go into the market for a month.
    Which Market?
    The Free Market.It’s Hell in there.
    You can say that again.
    It’s Hell in there.
    Goodnight,Father.I feel compelled to leave now.
    Leave now, or forever stay and preach!
    A strange choice.I’ll be off to write my,”One Sin A Day” Blog.
    Where is that?
    Oh,blogger.
    You ought not to swear here,
    Have you never heard of Blogger?
    Don’t keep saying it?
    It belongs to Google.
    Don’t say they are buying up rude words now.what next?
    The W
  • Bless me Father for I have skinned.
    Why are you here,my child?
    It’s ten bleats synched with my tweets since I began obsessing again
    I see.So you wish to confess?
    Well.either that or digress..
    Alright,my child.Blurt it out.
    I spent three hours trying to examine my conscience..
    And………..
    Well,I am filled with envy because my sister is so thin and beautiful.
    Is that your sister who lives up the road.
    That’s right.
    But she’s much fatter than you.
    No,no,She’s skinny as a rake..
    I think you are looking through the wrong end of the telescope.
    What telescope?
    I am speaking in metaphors.
    Can’t you speak in tongues?
    So you are envious of the slender physique of this lady who is so fat
    she can hardly walk?
    She’s just pretending…she always was lazy.
    Well,I recommend you have your eyes tested and also you need your head examining.
    Why?Have I got nits?
    Only metaphorical nits.You need a psychiatrist, I believe.
    I believe too but can’t you accept my regret at my sin.
    Definitely,I can but I can’t accept the stupidity of envying someone worse off than you.Absolution may help the sin but for stupidity it’s hard to think what to do.It’s like paranoia…the more you try to show people they are wrong,the more they cling to their belief.
    So what do you suggest,Father?
    You need to ask yourself why you keep comparing yourself with others.
    I see…they do say comparisons are odious.
    And envy and spite can cause a kind of blindness.
    So spite ruins your sight?
    Definitely.None so blind as those who will not see.
    I think I’m making progress.What’s my penance?
    Are you good at dress making?
    Do you want a new cassock.Father?
    No,I want you to make a beautiful dress for your sister.You will have to measure her height and her vital statistics and wrap her around in lovely silk fabric.
    That will give her a shock.
    It will give you one as well.Any more sins?
    Well,I keep getting hit on the head by the hairdresser.
    It’s not a sin.
    I know but it’s a sin that I keep going there and never say anything,
    Well for your penance it’s a facial and a hair cut at a better salon.
    This all seems a bit odd,Father.
    Well,we try to keep up with the times but it’s the same old sins..
    Envy,self hatred,other hatred,malice….bullying,murder..gluttony
    and that’s just in this one parish.
    Goodness, how do you cope?,
    Well,I shall never vote Liberal Democrat again..
    What’s politics got to do with sin?
    It’s all quite simple.The more the wealthy flaunt their wealth,bonuses and tax breaks the harder it is for the poor to say no to temptation.
    Sin has its social aspect.It’s not entirely personal.
    One virtue is to avoid causing others to fall into temptation.
    This is quite intriguing.Thank you,Father.
    Thank you…. and I’m standing as an Independent next time.
    What will you label yourself as?
    Not sure…how about
    It’s the rites that make it right?
    It sounds like the BNP
    Then
    If you want to go to hell,feel free but don’t take everyone else too.
    There are enough people in hell already.
    You’ll have to make it snappy.
    I’ll have to pray.
    How about
    Stop preying and start praying?
    The one drawback is that the old language of sin and so on seems outdated… we need new terminology.
    Raise your self esteem………do us all a favour.
    Be good and you’ll feel good.
    Love others even when it annoys them.. the fun of God.
    That’s it!
    The Fun of God…
    The Humour of the Numinous.
    I thought you might say:
    The Humour of New Mirth.
    Mirth is the latest thing
    No other quality can bring
    such great joy and happiness
    To our story.
    Mirth is the greatest joy
    Far better than cars and toys
    No other virtue can send
    such a sweet message
    Of God’s glory.
    Mirth is the only worth.
    Mirth us like heaven on earth;
    so why not join in and laugh.
    DON’T VOTE TORY
    Right,must dash…I can’t stop smiling … Let’s have a bash.
    Let’s create a brand new story

    The face within your face

     

    I saw for a few moments
    the absolute vulnerability
    of the face within your face.
    Heart touched heart.
    I knew you.
    You had a black umbrella.
    The rain struck hard.
    At the station we parted.
    Thank you,you said.
    I walked away slowly.
    The pools in the pavement gleamed
    with reflected light.
    I see you now,
    Like a finger with a torn off nail.
    Let no-one harm you .
    Let no fierce sun burn you.
    May you be protected

  • Come down,oh Blog divine.
    Clean this wrought mind of mine,
    And Kindle it with thine own Amazon password.
    O Holy Spirit,draw real near;
    Make all strain disappear.
    And subscribe me to all the intriguing and wonderful Websites I’ve never heard of.
    Oh,MSN
    Ah,men.

  • Make sure you do a fine sprint before your end implodes.
    I got the paw end of the tiger.
    Alan Turing was an enigma.He was a dependent from the Links
    and hypertext.Even the sphinx gave him a quick spook
    Stop battling your rage….go and strangle that Morse code.
    I try to flee between the lines… but I’m a word textpert
    I try to see between the lines….everything passes at some time.
    I try to be myself in between times…..I know you love me for my nonchalant poems alone
    I try to write on the lines………but I often wander round the points.
    I prefer unlined paper………….I like plenty of space to calculate my sin tax.
    I prefer the lines of your face…………they harmonise with the designs on my Wall.
    I tried to freeze the lines…………but they kept moving the whole Post.
    I love the words in your blog……..so original.Did you say you line Dutch caps and what is the main treason in that,if any?
    I like taking exams… it passes the time between rhymes.
    I like writing letters……they please my haunted wraiths and flaunted
    grace.
    I like to see you run time……….it makes my smartphone snappy.
    I like your flaws…..they appeal to my inner Grudgement.
    You are so line free….you must have been banjaxed…
    You are so smooth,there’s no groove for you in my heart.
    I prefer the posts already red.
    I like a site with a start venue,
    I like blogs about funny.
    Your Word meant all to me.
    His Word was made fresh.
    He liked my after lines.
    The clitoris
    is the epitome
    of sensuality,
    but we call for more
    variety.
    Freud thought the interior
    was superior
    How did he come
    to this conclusion,
    or more rightly,
    to a possible illusion?
    We can’t generalize
    On other women’s lives.
    Nor on men’s either…
    that’s a genuine tantalizer.

  • We are all one,
    with the literati,
    The clitorati,
    The flitorati,
    And the fitorati.
    All we wait for now
    are notoriety,
    impropriety,
    depravity,
    and this new society.
    give me more variety
    in my poetry.The clitoris
    is the epitome
    of sensuality,
    but we call for more
    variety.
    please come quietly
    to avoid
    being handcuffed.
    What,impiety?
    What kind of society?.
    Do they need a gratuity,
    Or shall we go for free?
    We’ll go for broke
    and go up in smoke.

    Negative capability [from wikipedia]

     

    Keats: The poet’s turn of phrasehttp://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Negative_capability
    The poet John Keats used the term negative capability to describe the artist as receptive to the world and its natural phenomena, and to reject those who tried to formulate theories or categorical knowledge. In this concept, Keats posited the world and the human to be of infinite depth. Such a position put Keats at the forefront of the Romantic movement, and even at the cusp of modernism, according to some commentators.[2]
    In a letter to his brothers, George and Thomas Keats, on December 21, 1817, Keats used the phrase negative capability for the first and only time.[3] He did so in criticism of Coleridge, whom he thought sought knowledge over beauty:
    I had not a dispute but a disquisition with Dilke, upon various subjects; several things dove-tailed in my mind, and at once it struck me what quality went to form a Man of Achievement, especially in Literature, and which Shakespeare possessed so enormously – I mean Negative Capability, that is, when a man is capable of being in uncertainties, mysteries, doubts, without any irritable reaching after fact and reason – Coleridge, for instance, would let go by a fine isolated verisimilitude caught from the Penetralium of mystery, from being incapable of remaining content with half-knowledge. This pursued through volumes would perhaps take us no further than this, that with a great poet the sense of Beauty overcomes every other consideration, or rather obliterates all consideration.[4]
    Keats understood Coleridge as searching for a single, higher-order truth or solution to the mysteries of the natural world. He went on to find the same fault in Dilke and Wordsworth. All these poets, he claimed, lacked objectivity and universality in their view of the human condition and the natural world. In each case, Keats found a mind which was a narrow private path, not a “thoroughfare for all thoughts.” Lacking for Keats were the central and indispensable qualities requisite for flexibility and openness to the world, or what he referred to as negative capability.[5]
    This concept of Negative Capability is precisely a rejection of set philosophies and preconceived systems of nature. Keates here advocated an acceptance of what we can know about the world as necessary being limited, and rejected the artist’s attempt to analyze, rationalize, or categorize the world. He demanded that the poet be receptive rather than searching for fact or reason, and to not seek absolute knowledge of every truth, mystery, or doubt.[6]
    The origin of the term is unknown, but some scholars have hypothesized that Keats was influenced in his studies of medicine and chemistry, and that it refers to the negative pole of an electric current which is passive and receptive. In the same way that the negative pole receives the current from the positive pole, the poet receives impulses from a world that is full of mystery and doubt, which cannot be explained but which the poet can translate into art.[7]
    Although this was the only time that Keats used the term, this view of aesthetics and rejection of a rationalizing tendency has influenced much commentary on Romanticism and the tenets of human experien

  • Mihaly was a saint of sorts;
    he improved, with his search for understanding,
    lives of so many yearning writers;
    the lame in spirit heard his Zen like words.
    He could not have imagined the journey
    From Hungary to Zurich to Chicago
    A glimpsed mandala led to the heart of the impossible image
    How did he learn to trust the flow?
    The Rhine flowing down to the North Sea
    May start as some minute spring
    At the confluence of the gravity of water and earth.
    And those then who have cast their nets into that sea
    May bring in treasures not found in the business of cities.
    At the first sighting,the image seemed hazy
    Then the words began to flow like current through a wire.
    Like a river cutting slowly through rocks of marble,
    like an unknown sage from the Himalyan Alps
    who had kissed the lips of his muse more than once
    As she floated like a ghost, no,more like music
    Tracing concentric spheres into the air
    Till the universe was singing.
    What was most human was his appetite,his love.
    Touch the hem of his garment,follow your flow
    Cut your path through the hard darkness until you find
    The sunlit sea you were made to swim in
    like a fish in its own sphere.
  • “Happiness awaits for those who cry, those who hurt, those who have searched, and those who have tried for only they can appreciate the importance of people who have touched their lives.”
    No author given [Think Exist.com]
    [Any strong language is here, of course, because of it rhymes ]
    As I sit here in silence,
    I think about your words;
    I think about your generous heart;
    Play the music that you shared.Why do we hurt the ones we love?

  • Why do we wield the knife
  • when we meet someone we want to keep
    As friends throughout our lives?

  • We all think we want love and joy
    But intimacy’s hard;
    But it’s better to be weeping
    Than never to have shared.

  • You may remain a virgin,
    Unwilling to take risks;
    But I can tell you what I learned:
    Living in fear sucks.

  • The world reaches out to touch us,
    and we shrink away.
    But this may be our final chance…
    So go out and get laid!

  • Get penetrating insights
    By opening your eyes;
    For all too soon, all too soon,
    Each of us must die.


  • I am not writing yet.I’m waiting for the ink to die
    I’m at the Fly Inn,waiting for the police kettle.
    I’m waiting for the other ball to drop.
    I’m waiting for his organ to play
    Wake-up and bill the Mafia
    I had a Wake Up fall.
    I came on the end of the bed and got bowled over
    He talks with the voice the wild western wind
    I talk softly and kiss a cowslip if it’s flowering
    I’m standing on the ink well but it’s still overflowing
    He came to life in the Wild Garden.
    I’m still not writing…I have lost the rites of passage.Oh,God our help with Rages past.
    Our hopes and fears still come.
    Please shelter us from Barclay’s Planck;
    Take us to Kingdom Come.
    The winds of change now blow so strong,
    Yet Thou art mightier still.
    Feed him that bitter pill today
    and his life will be long.

    I downloaded files from inner space.
    I dusted all my books.
    Too many hooks have caught my wrath.
    They gave me filthy looks

    Oh,God,our fantasy and dream,
    where can we find you now?
    Some find you in a still small voice
    Some in a holy Cow.
    I lie in meadows green as grass.
    I see you in a leaf.
    You’re vibrant as a violin string,
    Yet plangent in your grief.

P

Almost the beginning of July 2010


  • Incidentally at the mall” – Counting Sales

    “Anarchy in the Class War.” -Police Bristols

    “Along Comes Trouble.” by W.Grout

    “Captain Slacker” -Billy Joe

    “Capello of Limes” -Dixie Jupp

    “China Cup” -Market shop

    “Dearest biscuit,I’ll eat you now!: Recipes for lovers ” by Kate Bakestate

    “Desperanto…the new language” By K.Saythwaite

    “Loved her rarely but well..I cannot tell”.. Blindman and his Aunt

    “Everyday is People’s Day” Ms.Dina Moll in song with 1000 others

    “Elena and Quisling.Espionage ans me.” by A,Narcissistic-Thwaite

    “Exquisite Red Guy” by K.Marxthwaite

    “Wednesday Evening at 10 oclock…..she’s home again” by the Gnatthwaites

    “Will you kiss me tonight with a scone?” by A.Farmer-Wifethwaite

    Are you bard?
    Email me at

    writersrnotus@mail.gon

    kate@waitingmail.com
    kate@flyingmailbox.n
    piano@mymail.org

    The bard in your yard

    Oh,get me the lice and the wits
    Do get a gloom,Kierkegaard
    I’ll fit the bard in sideways
    I get all perked up
    I bough him hear plugs
    We get back up on the Morse code to practise the Enigma Variations
    I get creamed doubt in Lidl’s
    To get flush….steal honey from cranks
    I get frowns free..Frownsaver and Frownexpress
    Go Magnetic…so pathetic
    I get flossed by a dentist
    I get laid by my therapist6.
    I get paid by the prank…
    What a day for the Manx
    When do get my personal massage?
    Are you stiff yet?
    Throw out the fudge cake and get me a stake.I’m a ghoul around men.
    I am a ghost and I live in the closet.
    Let me do it on the highway

  • Do handle me with no gloves…skin on skin
    Your hand’s on my arms..is that Y’s?
    My handwriting is on the crawl again
    You are as handy as a locker on a the bottom of a bee.
    Llease cling on in there…you need to be here now
    She stranded me on a whim
    I hang on to every recurring decimal.Infinity is us.
    She framed him and he’s on the wall now,looking very handsome
    I am as happy as a jar of jam in the freezer
    Give me a spark or I’ll have no old flames
    He’s a glad sight at night
    He was hardly parted.. the comb is so sharp.
    Oh,see!A shop for bards… poems to your waist
    I find your dinner is not till tomorrow
    He has the brain of a hare at LSE

    Chaste makes waste….get laid now or forever travel on Virgin.
    Hate in hand
    I ate his lamb chops with relish…well,I just had some new potatoes as well.

    Do you have a heart in your mind?

    In that case.. always be kind.

    I love her Art.. it’s a pleasure to be traduced like that.

    Let’s improvise,it’s time for my annual embrace…

  • Clock on the mantelpiece beats, like my heart;

    More regular,not affected by emotion,vision,thought.

    Cats stand proudly in their grey stone bodies

    As if at the entrance to some other inner world.

    The heating comes on with a bump,

    and suddenly darkness has come to earth.

    Clock,clock forever beating,

    Will my heart outlast you?

    Will you tick for someone else?

    Though strong in silver case

    You feel nothing.

    Give me another heart instead,

    to share my feelings.

    Let another heart beat alongside mine,

    and we’ll be tuned in unison,

    Singing our song of love

    or heartbreak.Human,made of flesh

    We will drop like leaves

    Still hell’s clock beats steadily

    controlled by,not love,

    but radio waves.Imagine now

    these waves multi-layered across the earth

    carrying shopping lists,time,date.

    whilst we go on living ,

    our hearts fluttering like a cloud of butterflies,

    see they go on

    how the colours smile…

    love is a butterfly changing the weather a million miles a way.

    Think it this way

    Midwifery

    There’s many a true word spoken heart to heart
    We must love till we click off
    May I ask your advice?
    Keep weeping… then you won’t need to pee.
    I’m getting kissed in the mornings.
    I’m parasite…I’m attached to the Earth
    I was reborn in Jesus’ arms..he’s a midwife and he’s so good.
    Two rewrites make for much better work
    Ride on the sea in a pea green boat.You may see little pussy out there.
    We wish you a fairy Christmas and a very gay Year.
    Happy worth day to you;self love is quite free.
    Don’t take such a small feel of me..open your arms.
    On the seventh day, God jested
    God feasted.
    God sussed
    God,is he watching?

Early July 2012

  • Wrapped loosely in that old unlined coat,

    I walked past the lake and the tree where the robin always sang,

    as ducks slid over the water

    hurrying for those multiseeded wholemeal breadcrumbs

    I used to make in the food processor.

    in batches,from our leftover loaves.

    I had no fish for them nor wine,

    but they floated listening to the word of god

    as he spoke in a rushing wind

    through the leaves of mighty oaks

    the beeches and the chestnuts

    time seems like a circle

    I’m here again,in the same place;

    not even bread now,

    just myself to give.

  • That’s my snail’s hand writing.
    I quaked like a jailbird.
    I faked it on the day you were born;
    You are so clear,you are politely transparent

    This was an unnecessary wheedle.I loved you any way.Even when you stood on your head.I knew it was inner tensions that had wrought you to this condition.Accept my numerology..it smirked for me.

    Necessity is the mother of television
    She had nerves on wheels
    She’s as nervous as a democrat in a tyranny of fools
    I’m as nervous as a tabby in a room full of be off stares
    Forever put off until sorrow what you can’t grieve today
    She seems to have a new ease in life since she was elastrickated
    Are you a newbie? No,I’m a booby trap.
    Night guys finish with class
    It’s either fight or play
    Nip and pluck
    Slip it into my hood
    No amounting for waists
    Brainier than how…oh,who?
    It’s a flow and go situation.
    We love a virus…no colds barred
    No whiffs,sniffs. take life with a big fizz.
    Nomads like the higher land
    No one underlikes me.I’m so popular it delights me.
    I’m so clever I like to read the Bible in Chinese..I translated it direct from Aramaic.Where is Aramaic?
    I’m so stiff,I squeak when I get up.
    Keep that frown,it suits you so well

    ?


  • Don’t marinate me again.I’m very tender already.
    Stop beefing about and step this way

    Don’t hook up with your bugs.
    I have my own viruses already.

    I look upside down when you frown..
    I see you’re smiling this way.

    Don’t look at that man in the gloom.
    He could be Jack the Whipper.

    Don’t fake that race.
    Give yourself space.

    Don’t look so mysterious.
    I think we are related.

    Don’t look so cloudy.
    If you want to rain,here’s a tablecloth for your tears.

    You are looking so enticing tonight..
    I could eat you for supper.

    Stop making such a longing glance at him.

    A rolling stone is not a good boss.

    Do you speak the patois?
    No,we dance it here.

    You are looking very glamorous!
    Oh,it’s not you.
    I mean you’re not her.
    Can I buy you six drinks?
    Alternatively,do you fancy forty winks?

    SELL OUT

    I’ll take the railroad and you take the gas pipes.
    And I’ll be in hock land before you.
    For socialism is dying
    While we rich are buying
    The UK’s entire assets and the cat’s miaow.

    Where have all the cowards come from

    You look so miserable,you need gin.

    Can I distress all my sins at once,Father?

    I’ll see how God takes it.. he’s off line just now.

    Many friends give life worth,.

    Toad in the hole

    http://moonbun.hubpages.com/hub/Easy-Toad-In-The-Hole-Recipe#img_url_295700

    This is an old English dish.now one can get sausages made from beef,turkey and other meats instead of pork.Add a bit more seasoning.Make your own sausages?It’s just very finely minced meat and bread!
    I expect they use all the parts we don’t want to buy..
    A turkey’s ear anyone?

    Is vulnerability a bad thing

  • RELAXATION RESPONSE

    http://spiritualintelligence.com/?page_id=10

    The Relaxation Response has been developed by Herbert Benson, MD, based on his research into meditation practices in a wide variety of cultures and religions. The Relaxation Response reflects the most effective common elements of these practices. It has been found to be beneficial in promoting general health and well being, fighting illness and reducing stress. Benson advises that the Relaxation Response is most effective when it is linked with the user’s personal belief system, utilizing what he calls the “faith factor.” These are the procedures for the Relaxation Response:

    Pick a focus word or phrase that is rooted in your personal belief system, short enough to be said silently as you exhale normally. Some suggestions from the Christian and Jewish traditions:
    Our Father, who art in Heaven.
    Echod (The Hebrew word for “one”)
    Shalom (The Hebrew word for peace)
    The Lord is my Shepherd. (Psalm 23)
    My peace I give unto you. (John 14:27)
    Serve the Lord in gladness. (Psalm 100)
    Give thanks to the Lord; for He is good. (Psalm 136)
    You shall love your neighbor. (Leviticus 19:18)
    Hail Mary, full of grace.

    You may also use a more neutral word or phrase such as calm, relax, let go, rest easy, hang loose, or mellow.
    Sit quietly in a comfortable position.
    Close your eyes.
    Relax your muscles.
    Become aware of your breathing, and breathe very slowly and naturally. Simultaneously, as you exhale, repeat quietly in your mind your focus word or phrase. Use only one word or phrase during your sessions so that you can train yourself to relax simply by saying that word.
    Assume a passive attitude, and when other thoughts intrude in your mind, gently disregard them. This is common experience during meditation.
    Continue for 10 to 20 minutes.

    Practice the techniques once or twice daily. Books by Herbert Benson, MD include The Relaxation Response and Beyond the Relaxation Response.

  • Sunday afternoon…
    cat’s sitting by the step
    then runs up rungs
    on fence,pauses
    alert,on top.
    New cat,grey and shabby,
    watches,hesitates,
    turns away.He’s gone.
    Sky so full of grey,
    warm like a poultice
    over my face.
    What’s summer now?
    A leaf dripping rain water,
    A short blast of sunlight,
    A breeze.
    It’s so warm,
    what’s brewing?
    Not only tea.
    Holly berries gloat]
    like scarlet flowers,
    I’m brighter than you!
    but wait, a wood pigeon comes.
    He’ll eat the tree full.
    That’s your destiny,
    A pigeon’s bowel,be
    passing through,then.
    Clearly God does not disdain
    such functions
    For recreation.
    In and out,digested and rejected,
    the seeds will fall elsewhere.
    Wait,what’s this upon my head!
    That was unwelcome.
    But Nature knows no manners,
    Except for trees to bow
    Before the gale,
    And the larger to eat the smaller.
    So it goes on.
    Who digested me before I was created?
    Who will digest me later?
    Just worms and other hidden creatures.
    No doubt,they will form food
    for birds.
    So this wood pigeon
    Which shat upon my head
    May be an ancestor of mine
    Reconstituted.Hence
    I’ll bury its dirt in the earth
    To allow further creation
    To go on being.
    Ongoing being,
    That’s life.
    Digestion.

    Leave a little space

    When you speak,leave a little space.
    And I’ll leave a little space before I respond.
    A space where my mind can gather in her nets
    to see what your sentences draw up..
    The inner seas call out.
    They ebb and flow
    Tossing treasures onto the shore,like
    Sea shells where once your ancestors dwelled.
    Sometimes it’s good to walk that shore line
    with an empty mind.
    The vast space of the sky and ocean
    can be freeing.
    Space for dreamers’ boats to sail.
    to unknown and alluring places.
    Is the wind fair?
    It seems partly chance
    and partly readiness.
    When you speak to me,
    I’ll wait a moment;
    Then, in that space, my words will rise
    to engage and mingle with yours.
    Something new is born…….
    Our creation.
    Leave a little space,
    A little space between us.
    Space is the place for grace,
    for the spirit to enter us.
    Leave a little space for the unknown,unborn,the waiting.
    We must spare a little space for creation
    In between our minds.
    The in between is where life is born

July 2012 blog.co.uk

  • Abide with me,

    last orders are allowed;

    didn’t Jesus tell you:

    Reap what you have sowed..

    So you enjoy

    a wealthy life on earth,

    you will soon learn

    what is your moral worth.

    I’ll take the humble

    You can have the rest.

    With Satan here

    you’ll be a welcome guest.

    Aside from me,

    Whom else do you adore?

    Do you worship status?

    With me,that won’t go far.

    Apart from values

    on a stone Tablet,

    I gave you parables,

    And look now what I get!
    **

    You ignore me

    and all my lowly friends.

    You consume gold—–

    your banking frauds you tend.

    I feel so angry

    I’ll send another flood.

    You assume wrongly

    I am always “good”.

    I am in essence

    different from you.

    I’d feel more comfy

    Living in a zoo.

    Then with the tyger’s wrath

    As well as mine,

    You’ll be surprised

    By my vengeance Divine

    This blog will be private for a few “study and inspire” days.

    Come down,oh Blog divine.

    Clean this pale mind of mine,

    And Kindle it with thine own Amazon password.

    O Holy Spirit,draw real near;

    Make all my strains disappear.

    And subscribe me to all the intriguing and wonderful Websites I’ve never heard of.

    Oh,

  • “Owe it to yourself”

    Definition

    To deserve and need to do something which will be good for you

    Take a few days off work – you owe it to yourself.

    (Definition of owe it to yourself from the Cambridge Advanced Learner’s Dictionary & Thesaurus © Cambridge University Press)

    I owe it to myself to get a Kindle…but why can’t someone else give me one as a gift?

    I owe it to myself to eat well.

    I owe it to myself not to put bad poetry on my blog..that is,poetry written by me.

  • The longer the excuse, the less likely it’s the truth.”

    — Robert Half

    I never heard of this man,but seems he has a good point

  • You make life seem so beautiful I’d like to haunt you.

    Be my ghost!

    I write all this mubo jumbo because it will give me a phrase or a sentence to use later:

    Take a breath before you sleep.

    He leaked love all over me till I slipped naturally into his arms

    One trick more and you will break the cranks
    .
    Why don’t you sleep with a dictionary? It may redefine sex for you
    .
    Why don’t we dance backwards?
    We’ll soon get to the beginning again

    I can’t stop my clothes unravelling.

    He takes five men everywhere with him.Are they married?
    Not yet but the Church of England may do them soon…. and make an honest men of him.

    You make life seem so easy I’d like to haunt you.Be my ghost.

    You can take it from my lips with your lips…it’s just a cigar big enough for two

    Newton took mathematics to the limit without having a name for it.

    She took the news like a grain of salt falling into the sea.. she was utterly whelmed by it.

    I can’t read between the lines as there are no lines on my screen.

    Well,I must stand back and turn the stopcock.The Mirror cracked it across.


  • Waiting is almost too much.

    Time stretches these nerves.

    I wonder who I am;

    Lose myself in glass surfaces,

    Seeing only my shadow as I pass

    From this space to that;

    Waiting for you,

    I see you flicker

    In the corner of my eye,

    Like a migraine of the soul.

    Tears fall gently

    Wetting my cheeks and lips,

    As if roses were touched

    as if touched by your fingers

    as if by summer rain.

    Waiting,yet I know

    you are no longer here.

    Why does loss feel so like waiting?

    Why

  • Will you hug me when I turn to dust?You can share my wooden box if you must!

    You can study quanta,

    If you really want to.

    Just give your mind some freedom to adjust.


  • Stan had just got back to his lovely home from a bike ride on an old mountain bike.Emile had travailed in his special cat seat/basket just in front of Stan as he liked to see the road less traveled should it appear..and he liked purr to encourage Stan to ride further.

    When Stan got home to his luxuriously detached yet bijou home he went to the wonderfully disappointing cloakroom to wash his paws before putting the kettle on for some tea.
    Ah,how peaceful it is here,he thought…,how nice Mary is still at work.
    Suddenly and alarmingly, the door bell rang.There,on the flower bedecked porch,stood a large, beautiful curly haired woman holding Emile in her pretty freckled arms
    I believe this is your cat,she said boldly.So he tells me.
    Why he even knows the address.
    Well,if he’s anyone’s he’s mine,Stan admitted uneasily.
    What has he done now?
    Did you not notice he jumped out of his basket?
    she asked enquiringly.
    Well,no,Stan answered furtively..
    I was getting a bit tired and keen to get home…
    I forgot my water,
    Well,I hope you won’t let him do it again,
    he could end up absconding,
    By the way,I’m called Yvette.
    Are you Yvette Cooper,the MP,he enquired wildly.
    No, she said,I’m Yvette Hooper,the swan lover.
    Do come in for a cup of tea,he said caringly.
    I don’t mind if I do,she said,then I can be sure your cat is alright.
    Tell me,Stan said,Do you live with a swan?
    No,she said,though I do have an old Swan saucepan.
    A saucepan is not much company,Stan responded.
    Well,at least it never shouts at me!Yvette said quickly.
    Have you suffered verbal abuse? Stan said in a kind and supportive voice.
    I have yes.We had a mutual agreement that I could be handcuffed,gagged and verbally amused for 3 hours a week.
    But my boyfriend thought it was verbal abuse I wanted..As I was gagged I couldn’t tell him of his error.
    After that things were never the same.
    Why did you have handcuffs?asked Stan calmly.
    We were given them for Xmas,she whispered.
    Also a few whips and some rubber gloves.
    Why the rubber gloves?
    For washing up of course!
    But after being whipped would you feel like washing up?
    I don’t know.We split up before we even tried the whip.
    Alright, my dear.I understand it all.
    Here you are.. drink a nice cup of tea and try these biscuits I made myself they are almond biscuits from my Penguin Jewish cookery book.
    MMmmmmmmmmmmmm,delicious,she cried.Are you Jewish,Stan?
    No,but why should they have all the best recipes?
    A good point… maybe because they had the first alphabet so began to write them down before anyone else could.
    Not to mention they invented monogamy,a great religion,Freud,Wittgenstein,Einstein,rhinestone
    .Give them an accolade. I mean,Jesus Christ!
    What more do they have to do to be rewarded?
    Ascend into heaven?
    Make more cheesecakes?
    I wonder,said Stan pondering mentally.

    The back door opened and in ran Anne,Stan’s lover.
    She was dressed in soft teal with toning turquoise trainers and she wore a light beige foundation with bright coral lipstick making a subtle contrast.
    Oh,Anne,have some tea.
    This is Yvette,she very kindly rescued Emile after he jumped off my bike.
    Don’t tell me he can ride a bike,Anne screamed,
    showing off a good set of teeth and a long red tongue.
    No,I was riding it.Stan told her sensibly.
    Hello Yvette,Anne said,where do you live?
    I live on the top road by the wood.Yvette answered politely, her auburn hair standing up in a mass off curls as she spoke,showing off to good effect her light orange lipstick and burnt sienna eye shadow.
    Have you been there long?Anne enquired politely and warmly.
    No,only a few weeks..we don’t know anyone..
    So you are married?
    Yes,my husband is in the Police Service… he cleans policemen for special occasions.
    I didn’t know anyone did that.Can’t they clean themselves?
    A self cleaning policeman…or how about putting coat of Teflon on them so they can be wiped with a wet cloth?
    It’s up to him,said Yvette.I am a lecturer at Pond’s End Polytechnic.I teach philosophy..
    In a poly?
    Yes,I have a D.Phil from Oxgridge in the philosophy of science with particular reference to Dirac’s remarks on Wittgensteim.
    Do they study such remarks in a poly?
    All the students do Philosophy of Science…it’s compulsory.
    Stan said,I wish they all did Peace Studies too…
    I know,said Yvette kindly..If only we could bring peace but we are descended from the most aggressive primates… why many of them were sado-masochists.Well some were sadists and the rest were masochists I gather.The ones who weren’t died out as they never mated..
    Well,I’m not a sadist,said Stan,or at least only to myself!
    Do you beat yourself,the ladies asked.
    Just in my mind,he answered judiciously.
    Let’s have more tea,called Anne from the hall,I’ll make it.
    Anne is my mistress,Stan boasted humbly……
    There was little point trying to seduce or lightly whip Yvette now Anne had seen her.
    Yvette was intrigued.That is rare in an old man to have a mistress.
    Is a wife not sufficient for you?
    A wife is necessary but not sufficient,Stan teased her.
    Well,my husband has no mistress, she said unknowingly,
    but I have several boyfriends.
    How do you get the time?
    I have a rota,she chuckled happily.
    You seem an intriguing lady.
    May I have your email address,
    mobile number and your landline?
    Your height and weight too..
    Yes,it’s
    yvette999@hotmail.com
    or diracisme@qmail.com
    My phone number is Oh,oh,6666666666666.7777777777777777………………..
    That’s irrational,he informed her knowingly.
    Have you got an i Pad,she then asked boldly.
    No,I’ve not even got a Kindle..do you recommend them.Maybe you could come to ComputersRus with me on Saturday.
    No, she said,I’m Jewish.
    Are Jews not permitted to visit Computer shops..
    Some religious edict,is it? he said inquisitively.
    It’s the Sabbath,you dimwit,she responded.
    We don’t shop on the Sabbath
    but don’t worry I’ll come on Monday with you..
    you are a charming man.I need as many as I can get.
    Why are you deficient in some way?Stan whispered.
    No,I’m very proficient and mildly conceited,she admitted.
    And I like a good kisser.Are you a good kisser?
    Well,maybe you could give me a test,he said manfully,
    and if need be you can give me some lessons followed by a total Examination to see if I satisfy you.
    Just then Anne came in with fresh tea..
    Emile mewed loudly.
    What is it.Emile ? Stan asked.
    I am jealous because we cats can’t kiss.
    Well kissing is neither necessary nor sufficient in the art of love.Rolling about together in some soil is also very nice..
    I hope you don’t expect your wife to roll about in soil,said Yvette
    questioningly..
    Well,i can ask her,Stan said,but her main interest is topology and knitting.She is often very cold in bed…
    Can’t you warm her into life;Or buy an electric blanket?
    No,she’s hopeless because of Asperger’s syndrome but I love her anyway.
    Have you tried a new technique like whipping each other or tying yourself to the bedposts.You can buy handcuffs now in Boots,I hear.
    Why some doctors prescribe them on the NHS nowadays
    I thought Love was enough, Stan answered
    It seems in the UK people are into whips and handcuffs…
    Well,count me out,said Stan,I’m more into a careful yet tender study of the skin from the toes right up to to head,followed by gazing into her eyes for ten minutes.
    Why ten minutes?asked Yvette.
    I can’t wait any longer…
    Well,you’ll have to practise..she said coyly.
    I can practise with him,said Anne virtuously.
    Yes,the more the better…he’s getting older so he can’t wait.
    He needs satisfaction as son as possible.
    The door bell rang,It was handsome Dave the paramedic.
    Hi,he said,I was worried as you’ve not called 999 today.I brought a gag and some whips.
    I’m Yvette,the woman said.
    I’m bisexual,he told her.
    That’s a strange name.
    Never mind that,give me your email address and phone number
    It’s ywoman@love4all.com,she said

    or 09964321.3333333333333333333…..
    If you’d like a non rational phone number email me at
    hotcats@hell.com

    Read more freely in the Daily slur tomorrow….on sale everywhere and making life hell as fast as they can

  • It seems we all have a touch of narcissism

    As well as paranoia

    And grief.

    Sometimes it’s hard to realise

    that other people are our equals

    in this existence game;

    that they each have a mind and world of their own.

    But now I think of this,

    Isn’t it wonderful that there are all these worlds

    And that I’m not the centre of the universe.

    And if God cares for a sparrow

    I like Him.

    Though what He is

    Is not expressible in our language.

    How dull life would be

    If I were the only real person in it

    And if I wanted every one to admire me

    And think well of me.

    And how sweet it is to love an other,

    Eye to eye,

    Skin to warm skin.

    and how the sun was so red at daybreak

    and the bare twigs gleamed in its light.

    and how precisely you are different from me

    Yet I can understand you, at least in part.

    We are all absolutely important

    And yet paradoxically unimportant.

    And how sweet it can be to lose oneself

    to become entranced by creation,

    Or by a loved one;

    By being with children.

    Worlds and worlds unfold.

    All we need is respect.

    Be an other lover,today

    Teeth exercising

    Can you parse me the cheese,dear?
    Cheeseo
    Cheeseas
    Cheeseat.
    Cheeseamus
    Cheeseatus
    Cheeseant.
    how about the butter?
    We never reached butter.
    Logically if the Romans had cheese it would seem they’d have butter too,
    Life is rarely logical..
    How nice we don’t have to worry about the paradox of the liar.
    Well,it’s never worried me.Ignorance really is bliss sometimes.
    Well,it’s just a play on words..
    I’d rather play on an organ.
    You could do both.. life is not either or..
    Is it all black and white to you?
    No it’s a whiter shade of pale……….or sometimes it’s teal.
    Get the l out of it and make me a pot of tea,please.
    Will you drink it straight from the spout?
    Well I’ll have go.
    It’s often most satisfying.
    I guess it’s the quickest way to quench my thirst.
    You are certainly in need of it today.
    I’m in need every day.
    I believe in giving to the needy.
    How sweet,how neat….I feel like a teat.
    I see the tea pot is abreast…
    Are you keeping level?
    No but the tea is level.
    That’s just gravity.
    You’re so so suave.
    And you are so delightful.. you make me feel eyefull.
    Are you a site for sore eyes?
    Not yet but i’m developing one soon..
    Well,where’s that cheese?
    It’s in the thesaurus…
    I usually keep it in the fridge..
    Well,mine is full…it floweth over.
    Who are you,the Bible?
    Read me today,I pray.
    Shall I pray?
    Not in bed.
    Why,surely we can pray anywhere.
    Wait till I’ve sucked up all this tea.
    There’s some who are born suckers…
    Well,we have no teeth.
    Can’t you rent them?
    The dentist might have a fit.
    No,no,he makes them fit.
    I’ve never seen teeth exercising!
    Watch my lips