Tag: housework

How to attempt to keep house without panicking

10403606_483675265105690_2060981220485141876_n 10712907_483677188438831_449934974875129366_nI don’t think  that women have genes for cleaning but it’s obvious to children that women tend to do housework more than men so girls get roped in or just watch more.

1.Get a plastic bucket or a tray or some other such thing and walk around each room collecting things which do no live there… assuming nobody else will do it.Then try to put them where they should be like  a bowl of hot water.Or a cupboard.Failing that keep them into a plastic laundry basket  or similar

2.Wash up.Now and then wash the sink with a suitable cleaner and the other appurtenances.Wash cloths  or use disposable ones.

3 Go into each bedroom, unless it’s an able bodied adult’s and sort through clothes etc… hang up or put in laundry basket.Train older children to do this.

3 Put clothes into Washing Machine.Examine labels for temperature.If you are  ucky you may have a machine with a Handwash programme.Use the right detergent… look it up!

4 Now and then it is wise to change your sheets etc as well as towels and other such items.These usually need a hotter wash to kill germs.Hang them outside if possible.You can buy large folding  clothes airers if you have no washing line.

5.Wash  or wipe the table[s].Polish if you like to…Wash the kitchen surfaces as often as you can manage especially if you cut  bread or bake.

6 Vacuum or sweep the floors.But dust first if you dust.Or wipe shelves with a damp cloth.

7.Wash  floors with a mop when appropriate…often if there are many people around.

5 Ironing kills germs.If you can afford it pay somebody else to do it if you are older or fragile.

6 Put away clean clothes,sheets etc. as soon as you can.. in my case it’s usually weeks!

7. Every hour or so make a cup of tea and sit down.Remember  some women do  all this  cleaning and tidying up for years and men often never notice until their wife is ill.Think.. it’s all possible if you think.

8 All that remains is to decide what to eat and to cook it and then wash up.This needs planning ahead  and shopping but keep a few emergency rations like  eggs,baked beans,cold meat etc.Remember fuit and veg…. even if you are alone.Maybe take a multivitamin and fish oil… good for heart and brain.

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See it’s easy really…!

And it keeps you slim [ for a while]

The Bible add on:Evening at home

NEW RELIGIOUS TAX ON KOSHER DOGS IS UNFAIR!
NEW RELIGIOUS TAX ON KOSHER DOGS IS UNFAIR! (Photo credit: roberthuffstutter)
Easter morning headline
Easter morning headline (Photo credit: c_neuhaus)
Thus Saith The Lord God
Thus Saith The Lord God (Photo credit: premasagar)

And it came to pass that they ate their dinner
and that she did washeth up.
And she did leave the dishes to drain
Whilst she put on the washing machine.
and the man was very pleased.

And it further came to pass
that she gave the man some pudding
and he was more pleased.
And then it came to pass the he fell asleep
By the fire.

And the Lord God,said
who is this man that sleepeth by his fire?
And He said,I shall waken him up
And the man awoke,
And God spake unto him

How is it that the woman laboureth in ye kitchen.
And that thou sleepeth here in an armchair.
And the man said,
But Thou didst order women to labour.
And the Lord God said unto the man
Why dost thou remember so selectively what I have said?
And the man said,
I knoweth not and therefore I will help this woman.
And the Lord God said,
Why dost thou not think of it thyself?
And the man said in reply,
It was Thou that made me,O God.

And the Lord God was displeased with the man.
so he called down a plague of butterflies
To prevent him from sleeping.
And when the woman came in
she was much pleased to see these butterflies
and so she fell onto the man
And he did make love unto her.
And the cat was very pleased.

For it thrilled a cat to watch humans loving
and gave him hope
That the Lord God would take his rib and make a mate for him.
And indeed it doth seem to have happened
Judging by all the cats staring in ye old window here;
And by their ecstatic yelps
That the Lord God was very generous with them
and made them many mates.
For truly there is no jealousy among them
And they mate freely and happily
and never have rows about the washing up..
as they eat straight from the can.Amen

Here endeth today’s lesson.
Be thou kind to thy mate always

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Fifty shades of grey?

This book is now famous and perhaps as widely read as the Bible

I saw it before it was famous for I often rest in an armchair in Waterstone’s bookshop.Whilst there I pick up some novels from the new books section and take a look at them.I took this along and read about five pages.I felt the prose was possibly worse than average.And it was boring.I never reached the part where the sado-masochdomesticism comes in though I have looked since.At the time there was nothing at the beginning at all sexual.I see that later on He tells Her that he is going to force her to have oral sex with him.But it’s expressed more briefly.What is puzzling me is why so many people read it.I am sure one can find much more tittilating tales.Or more tales about tits,even.I believe whips come into it too.I thought the title was referring to all the different types of dust one finds in the home,on one’s head or on the cat.I was hoping it was about domestic affairs with a duster not a rope and whip!I find cleaning keeps me fit and my sex life is private.Whereas  in this book they never do any housework.Who cleans t he whips and buys the French letters?Who pays the bills,writes the wills and washes sills ?Not this lady

I recommend Vladimir Nabokov because he write so beautifully.