Eternity in a grain of sand

As the end neared  his  old mind was stirred
Was active as a river in full spate
Like the visions, intentions, he had learned

Women  whisper fearing to be heard
In married love, how  best to navigate?
On the way to peace his hand was bare

Respect and  truth, like wisdom, must be earned
We come to understand,is it too late
 To bring perception  when with  hate  we   burn?

In my kitchen stood a little bird
The robin  he had fed from breakfast plates
To the very end, alert and brave

As he faded I began to mourn
Seeing him turn pale, inviolate
I  held his hand while tears clumped like a storm

How do we  dare to   find that holy gate?
The  truth  known to  the heart makes no mistake
On the  path to  death,  our minds combined
In the visions, intentions,  we had shared

99 Alderman’s Crescent
Alligator Hill
Manchristchurch

Dear Dr Brown

Thank you for referring this 73  year old lady.She  is  suffering  but I cannot decide if it is a psychiatric problem or a  normal reaction to an abnormally bad society and government,
She has nightmares where she threatens to kill her  boyfriend and the cat though she has never gone further than fantasy in real life
.She cannot eat food made in the UK but has to import it from France or choose carefully what she cannot grow
Her boyfriend seems quite happy with her so I propose you do not give her new medication but suggest they redecorate the  bedroom,remove the built in  television and use the space for  keeping art books and  sunhats
If you need more help, please write and I shall see her again.She is one of the most charming people I’ve ever met so I will not be unhappy to review her state of mind

Yours  blindly

Brian Mc Haggerty M D .MRCP .D.Phil  [Dublin]  M.Sc [Wigan]  Ph.D [ Tottenham]
Currently on medication for schizoid personality disorder and addiction to studying useless subjects

https://www.theguardian.com/world/2018/apr/19/hans-asperger-aided-and-supported-nazi-programme-study-says

“Asperger is hailed as a pioneer in the field of child psychiatry and paediatrics, particularly for his groundbreaking contribution to the understanding of Asperger syndrome and the autism spectrum.

But by unearthing previously untouched documents from state archives, including Asperger’s personnel files and patient case records, Czech has revealed a scientist who allied himself so closely with the Nazi ideology that he frequently referred children to the Am Spiegelgrund clinic, which was set up as a collecting point for children who failed to conform to the regime’s criteria of “worthy to live”.

Nearly 800 children died at the clinic between 1940 and 1945, many of whom were murdered under the notorious child “euthanasia” scheme.

In a joint statement, the editors of Molecular Autism – Simon Baron-Cohen, Ami Klin, Steve Silberman and Joseph Buxbaum – said they welcomed the fact that Czech’s “meticulous research” had finally thrown light on decades of scepticism about Asperger’s claims that he had taken a caring approach”

Mary was walking down the High Street of a little town  a few miles from Knittingham. Here stood tall trees, which have been hacked into stumps by the local council,They are vehemently opposed to anything that might change the town into an upmarket suburb of   Knittingham. They wante it to be ‘modern’, like a small version of Manhattan or Paris, maybe, or even London. but there was not enough room to build a skyscraper or a Gherkin, like the one that Ken Livingstone had erected in London after he went to Soho

Mary was wearing a long, blue, unlined, woollen coat from Marks and Spencer, over a dark grey and green sweater dress, with matching leather boots .  iIn her hand, she carried a large green handbag, which contained her Kindle Paperwhite and her purse

Suddenly she had a loud cry: “Mary, Mary!”.

She looked round and there was an old friend whom she knew  before the advent of smartphones and computers and, therefore, not being very well organised, she had lost the address of this dear lady, Margaret.

“Shall we go and have a cup of coffee in that  Turkish restaurant?”, Margaret inquired politely.I have my cat in the car and I’ll get him a scone.The people are very friendly

“What a brilliant idea!”, Mary cried, “I have come out just to have a change of scene and Annie, my friend in in Knittingham, has got measles I have a cat myself

“I do hope you’ve had  measles already”,  said Margaret.

Yes, I have”, Mary  lied.
“Well, tell me your latest news. How is your rheumatoid arthritis?  Have they given you any of these new drugs, which suppress your immune system to stop it from attacking your own body?”

“No, they haven’t given me any yet”,   Margaret replied cheerfullyA bit late now

“I believe that, nowadays, they give them to people right at the beginning of the illness tbut, in my day, they did not give them to you until it was fully  developed , unfortunately, I have become somewhat disabled.”

“Well, how do you manage living on your own?”Do you have a lover who might help you?

“No lover as yet but I have various devices that I can use”, Margaret told her with a twinkle in her eye,  giving Mary the impression that Margaret was the owner of a gigantic array of vibrators and other similar implements  trying them out for some Health Magazine for the handicapped

Mary was thinking that they were probably better than codeine for taking your mind off your pains and aches which, in the case of arthritis can be  excruciating, making it impossible in many cases for a woman to have sex  though she had imagined marrying her cat Emile as he had expressive eyes and did not desire her body
She did not tell Margaret what she was thinking but  said:

 “I know that you can get a stand for your electric kettle, so that you can pour the water out of it without lifting the kettle up from the work surface., and you can also get vacuum cleaners that are self-propelled.”

As Mary had a great many books, she was unlikely to buy one of these vacuum cleaners, because they would knock over all her carefully choosing piles of scholarly works and art books, not to mention the tubs full of pens and pencils, and coloured pastel chalks.

When they went into the cafe, the waitress was very polite and soon they were drinking their coffee at a little table in the window, from where they could see the local people passing by.Many were wearing badges asking for an end to the Civil War in Britain

“You’ll never guess what happened to me”, Margaret said

, “I was in  the bookshop, where they have a folding chair for me to sit ; they know I can’t stand up for a long time without suffering pain.  I’d just sat down when this young woman came up to me and said:”

“You can’t sit there and read: you have to go upstairs and sit in and armchair.”

“Well, if you show me the lift, I will be very happy to go upstairs ” , I said humorously

.Or maybe you can carry me up as you are very heavy and strong

“We don’t have a lift”, t he woman cried loudly, “We only have one for us to  take books upstairs and we do not allow customers to use it, because it is not insured.”

=Would you mind if I just sat here for 5 minutes?”

“No!, you cannot sit there for 5 minutes”

“ Well, I was unable to get up, straight away”, said Margaret “but, as soon as I could, I put the expensive book, which Ihad been going to buy, back onto the rack of new non-fiction and saved  £20  there and then

” “That’s not very nice”, continued Mary. i“It might even be illegal to tell a disabled person  to go up some stairs, when there is no lift or escalator.”

Margaret  called
“Let’s talk about something else.  I like that coat: it’s a lovely shade of Prussian blue

“Never say the word Prussian to me”, said Mary “it reminds me of the war.”

“Well”, said Margaret “if our luck continues on its present track and also the Middle East, there will be almost no country that we can talk about it without  getting distressed by the name.”

It’s a real indictment of humankind.Civilisation is inextricably linked to War.Let#s put that thought aside and talk about clothes instead

“I like this coat however we name the olour”, said Mary “because it is made of wool and the sleeves are lined but the body is not lined, which means that is suitable for this early spring weather and also quite llight to wear always an advantage for the older lady. iIt also covers up whatever else I am wearing underneath because it is quite long.”

“What  on earth are you wearing  underneath?”tMargaret asked humorously

“For all you know I might  have nothing underneath it”, said Mary “exccept a pair of silk knickers and a silk vest.”

But I have a dress on over my silk and wool underwear,I am using an deodorant called

Unarmed and dangerous

“ I have changed a lot since my husband died and I do all sorts of peculiar things.  For example, I believed in times it will soon be legal to marry an animal and I would like to marrylEmile, so that he can sleep in bed with me rather than on top of the bed.”

“But he might scratch you accidentallyy!  “, cried Margaret.And can he kiss you?

“Oh, there’s always a fly in the ointment”, Mary said.

“Well don’t marry the fly”, her  friend responded.”I don’t think that Father Brown would like that, even if it could speak and say ‘I do’; it would definitely not want to sleep in bed with you. it will be flying  around  your bedroom, buzzing all night, and I don’t think it’ll be the only. one”
“I have to marry a spider then”,  said Mary, “Maybe two spiders”

They both laughed uproariously, to the amazement of all the other people in a cafe

“It’s good to see old ladies laughing isn’t it?”

It certainly is.”

“So will you be going back to that book shop?”

“Well, I did try to go back but, as I approached the door, my mouth went very dry and I realised I was getting that ‘fight or flight’ reaction, even though I didn’t feel so anxious but something inside me was worried that history was about to repeat itself and I ’d be the object of scorn and derision.”

“Yes, it’s horrible to feel humiliated isn’t it”, said Mary. 

“I was reading an article in the Guardian, which said that some scientists of the most social sorts have discovered that even the nicest people unconsciously see disabled people as less than human.”.

“Oh my god! that is very frightening because I am getting older and I might get disabled and then I will suffer like you do.”

“Well, you have to be  tolerant of suffering”

But how tolerant should one be? I don’t want to have back some of those politically correct people who go around like Methodist -preachers, attacking people who are agnostic or who want unisex toilets

“Are there any heterosexual toilets?”

“I’ve never seen any but you never know.”

After drinking their coffees, they walked into Marks and Spencer’s  to look at the new spring clothing

That looks like a satin  tracksuit!”,   Mary called politely

“I believe that the short trousers are coming back into fashion. tThey are a big problem because itthey puts all the focus on your ankles, so you cannot wear those dirty old socks that you can wear  at home or with long trousers. I think they are a plot to make us buy ankle boots.”

Everything’s  a plot now, isn’t it. 

“Don’t say that to the doctor or she will think you are getting paranoia.”

 “Getting paranoia? I’ve been paranoid all my life.”“How sad!”

We’ll, nowadays you need a bit of paranoia, especially if you come from Europe and believe that you can work in Britain and contribute to the economy, while enjoying all the lavish pleasures of London city and nightlife.”

“The so-called foreigners are much more courteous than English people. iIn fact I a’m ashamed to be English now and I pretend that I came from Ireland instead.”

You look more like a Valkyrie.”

“Don’t say that! I hate  the composer Wagner.”

“I do believe the word existed before he wrote the music but I understand how you feel. It’s not your fault that you’ve got blonde hair and blue eyes and a white skin.”

“My hair isn’t really blonde any more.  I think it’s more silvery, like Helen Mirren.”

“Does it really matter what her hair looks like now?”

”“Well, we have to amuse ourselves somehow and, since we no longer have husbands, wel ’re deprived of much pleasure and love, and we  have to put out the wheelie bins ourselves, which I think is really awful.”

Well, it’s a sort of exercise, isn’t it?”

“If that’s all I got, I’d be paralysed by now!”

“So, what else do you do?”

“I do some vacuuming, now and then, I move books out of the bookcase and carry them into the other room and, you won’t believe this, last week I accidentally put a bag of nearly new clothes into the ‘dirty’ wheelie bin and found I still had the rubbish in the hall.!  Unfortunately, the bins had been emptied and there was nothing I could do to get them back.Mind you, I did feel a certain relief but as the hall was no longer full of black bin liners and other stuff like that..

Not to mention all those cables, cords, and chargers that we have nowadays. I think the computer was invented purely to give us more things to buy, to keep the economy going. Nobody really wanted to have computers but they realised that, once you got one, you would want to connect it to your camera, or your television, or the printer, and so it would mean a big market for those cables and cords.

But it gives me something to do, while the Government argue about  Brexit.”

It’s not just the Government who are arguing. My gardener nearly hit me when I said I wanted to remain in Europe. I am forbidden to mention Brexit anywhere near him.”

Photo by rawpixel.com on Pexels.com

Photo by rawpixel.com on Pexels.com

Photo by Jean-Baptiste Burbaud on Pexels.com

“I have noticed that it doesn’t matter what the evidence is,; even the most intelligent people will not change their minds, so it must be coming from a deeper level.”

“It sounds  as though people are trying to understand why Hitler wanted to exterminate the Jews and they have come up with all sorts of theories about his childhood.  I thought it might be related to sexual fantasy   but the latest idea is that it is beyond explanation in any human terms; it is evil beyond our ability to explain. It is not true that, if Hitler did not exist, someone else would have behaved the same way. He could have lost his mind when he was defeated by Russia at Stalingrad but, if you lost your mind, would you go and exterminate six million Jews  and gays or 6 million  other people?

 The frightening thing is that it could so easily become the way that Muslims are treated. People say to me: “I don’t want to think about politics, it’s upsetting me”,
but isn’t that what the German said in the 1930s?  If we don’t bother about it, we may find ourselves in a trap that we can’t escape from.

 It is painful to think about these things, when we would rather think about the daffodils and the magnolia flowers, but who will protect us  or guard us, when we go further down this lunacy track.”

“Yes, I see what you mean. iIt’s like thinking that know, if people are depressed, sad, worried, it’s just thought to be very, very bad and they have been put on tablets and getting CBT when, in fact, it may be  appropriate to  feel that way, as long as one can channel it into some useful activity.”

i“It can give you energy… I believe there’s a big march in London against racism and fascism.  I don’t know wherether the big marches have any effect. dDo you remember the one against the Iraq War?  One of the biggest matrches ever seen in London and yet it made absolutely no difference to Tony Blair.”

“Anyway, just give me your news before we depart.”

“I shall tell you what; I’ll give you my email address and then we can communicate about our children or our other activities: grand-children etc. Maybe we can meet more frequently now, as we don’t have to rush home to make the dinner.”

The two women hugged each other before they separated and then Mary went back to the High Street. although she couldn’t remember now what she was going to buy.It might have been an electric tin opener, or a bottle of wine, or a throw from Robert Dyas to hide under, if anybody looked through the window.

Does it  matter what she was going to buy? s She just wanted to get some fresh air, and meeting  old friends always a good things, especially for aged people

I’m sure Emile would agree,  if Mary brought him with her in her handbag, but he was putting on weight and  is a little bit too heavy to carry.  It would be wonderful  if Emile were very big, then Mary could ride on his back as if he were a donkey
Why not buy a real donkey?

“Oh no! cry all of us .”

Care of the elderly Clinic
99 Knittingham Road
Ollerpond
Knotts
OL1  7ON

Dear Dr Rattle

Thank you for referring this 67 year old woman.I have examined her from head to toe and I cannot acount for her hostility to people from Europe.I would examine her mind but we do not have the  ability as yet
I suggest you advise her to do Voluntary Work  or  get a lover.Or both.Reading poetry can calm some pople.
She has given me a headache and  made me feel  helpless.Next I’ll be in the Asylum with all those Seekers we read about.
I know I am lucky to have been so well educated coming from the lowest class in Britain so I will think of that instead.
How do you  cope with her?

Yours as ever

Anne Smotherhingham   MD,FRCS,D.Phil [Oxford] Ph.D [Athens] Diploma in Communication [Wigan] Professor of Poetry [Part time,Harvard]

I

I had a big disappointment recently.I shall never be able to wear a miniskirt again
The bones in my legs do not meet correctly at the knee.To think I spent years displaying them to  all and sundry until I read the letter from the Consultant

Another one is  that fig roll biscuits are much smaller than they used to be. as are bars of milk chocolate.Even our coins are smaller.
Oh., for a half crown or a florin
A pound coin now looks like a  shrunken two shilling piece , it’s not even as big as threepenny bit!
Size can matter,Imagine if we were reduced in size by 90 %.We would not be able to sit in a chair any more nor eat at the table.We would not be able to get on a bus even and worse, no way to sit on a loo.What woe.
Still if I look round I am bound to find someone with even worse legs than mine.I takes my mind off Brexit.And yours too.I hope

Passion yodel
Dashing model
Lashing huddled
Crashing muddles
Hashing goggles
Stash bedazzled
Washing cuddles
Wishing puddles
Bashing  muzzled
Flushing waddles.
Hamming puzzles
Amo,Amass, Amat
Lashes bundles
Washing googled
Oh, no,  how crass .do what?

I sometimes rude the day I was born
She is a  passion model
I liked her address last week
Do you like my lapse?
I  just wish I could be borne
My hare looks rather dreadful today
My buzzard is not nice to men
Why can’t a computer escape from your lap?
Buzz ’em again
Do you reel and need insurance? Don’t waste any longer
What a fuss about No Thing
We  lasted right through Lent and abstained from coffee till  Rita
Is this MY last supper?
I love engineering and trousers.Can I be a woman  in hell?
I used to like an atlas.Then it was buoys.Then I got horrid and had to keep  my husband in  bottles  with no hot water
I  marred a man forever
I bowt a cushion int’ parkit
Free food  and drink now

Grief  and love are linked by  metal chains
Imagination cannot  foresee change
When love’s killed, its ghost will haunt  and blame

In our wanderings through our mind’s domains
The furniture  will need to be arranged
Rage and love are linked by a  steel chain

The mind itself can change the human brain
The one most strong may be the one insane
When love dies, its shadow will  remain

The hate of loss , the savage mark of Cain
The rational one can  almost  be deranged
Grief  and love are linked by a  steel chain

What is lost will  heal in its due time
Murderous love   comes from the most estranged
When love’s killed its  ghost will  cause  much pain

Suffering most acute is  in its  place
Chronic losses cause a pale strained face
Grief  and love are linked by a  gold chain
When love’s killed, its ghost will haunt  and blame

My husband liked this picture..I wonder why?

Pity Theresa May’s dry vocal chords. The Prime Minister this week finds herself without a voice (nor a Brexit deal, for that matter). Yesterday she spoke in Parliament with a hoarse, rasping voice, after her withdrawal agreement was rejected by MPs by a significant 149 votes.

From the Telegraph website

The Guardian had Reign for rein today

Reign in your passions please boys [I invented that] but it is similar

More imventions:

Pull the horse’s reigns off immediately

It’s reigning again today.
Don’t be so rued about the Queen
I was very rued to the teacher to day
She must have rude the day she married him
I rude the day I began teaching students at Oxford when I could have been embedded with my lover.
Noone can separate us, we are elder together by love
Are you not horrid yet?
No, we are waiting for the Pope.
Y?
Don’t keep asking one litter questions, is that ok with you?
Whose she, the cat’s mither?
To bee or not to bee… a wasp

Valhalla Hospital
Nerve Route
Woltom
Ferseyside
UK
FR13 n 0WE

Deat Dr Smith
Thank you for refering this 78 year old woman who is an expert on wasps.I
asked her to undress and she hit me with her handbag ,It broke my nose.She is a cook and was carrying some weights for her old weighing machine in it plus 3 phones,3 sets of geometric instruments and a dead cat.
I wonder if a psychiatrist might help her.I am a  cardiologist.If she carries that bag all day her heart must  be strong.
I was planning to do an angiogram  but  I am on sick leave now

Thanking you again

Joe Southport MD FRCS D.Phil.[Oxford] Ph.D [Wigan] D.Sc [Pentonville] Registered sex offender

Like a black pan lid
Darkness descended
Light around the edge
Golden, undetected

Forsythia feebly waved
In March winds
Birds laughed quietly
As if Nature sinned

The pine tree tall
Higher than the house
Dignity and grace
Be thou my spouse

Golden again,
The sky pleases
Its unity  comforts
Our bits and pieces

Gathers us up
A rich mother
Accepting hate
Whatever

Green attracts
To the holly tree
Where sparrows hide
To look and see

Berries lost
To feed the birds
Shining points
The leaves preserved

The amiable,the fierce both dwelt in you
You dived, a gentle fish, into dark sea
Where living people cannot be immersed
The amiable, the fierce  both lived in you
I watched you going  through a sheet of tears
They dropped  as does the Tees with its High Force
The amiable, the fierce  were always there.
You dived, a gentle fish, into  dark sea

Now the world of man has well surpassed
The time we could blame God for what we ‘ve missed
How can it be that He is never here?
His absence haunts: symbolic, suffered, real.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b0bty2g2

If you can get BBC programmes I recommend this.There is a series.. one about Uganda

https://owlcation.com/humanities/Poetic-Forms-in-English-Literature

Avacado  Brexit …. each half has a different sauce
Eggs Quarantined in mustard
Soup incorporating shingles jab and raw onions

Duck a la  Trump with fake orange sauce and plastic potatoes
Beef and green peas with orange tomato salad and window dressing
Ham and Tongue Loaf with a greeting via fakish  microphone
Minced lamb and mint sauce in a Yorkshire pudding made with Canadian flower and  real egg

Lemon mousse with fake cream [no Nestle’s now]
Creme Foolery and burned orange sugar
Wine Jelly with real tinned fruit and swan custard
Apple pie and Chesire cheese  with HP sauce and plumbed jam

Water free Glass £5

Coffee £6…. cup £45

No tea left after feeding emigrants heading for Australia