Mary was knitting a large shawl on a circular needle and following the pattern in her BBC knitting book from the 1970s she had to increase in the center of each row by one stitch or was it two stitches I cant quite remember.
When she got up to 228 stitches and was beginning the next row she forgot where she was and so she began to count from the beginning to see if she’s reached 114.
She got up to 98 when Stan who was reading the Guardian turned her and says,. have you read this article by Samuel Heeps today!
I don’t think so, she murmured as she began to count from the beginning again.
When she got up to 97 he responded
Surely you must know whether you Readvit or not.
Yes perhaps I will remember soon she retorted as Emile mewed silently.
The third time she got up to 101
The fourth term she got hooked to 103
Are you sure you don’t remember this article, her husband
Mary is a very patient woman but nobody is perfect so she stopped knitting said to her husband can you look at me please
So he did and then she said I am knitting this very big shawl but I am not an expert and sometimes I have to count the stitches so before you speak will you look at me and see whether I am counting or not please!
Oh I’m so sorry darling. I never speak when you are writing on the computer or reading the latest work of Adam Phillips in but I did not realize that you can’t knit something like that without having to look at it carefully now and then.
So then Mary began and got to the center and increase in the middle and stitch on both sides
And eventually she finished the shawl
And decided not to divorce her husband
After all, who would want a totally silent husband?
That’s a question I can’t answer
How my heart sings 