There was an old lady from Cairo

Who wrote all her posts with a biro.

Until she got sick

She wrote with a bic

She’s someone you have to admiro.

Please don’t use ballpoints on screens

Ink is not quite what it seems

It’s hard to remove

And keep the screen smooth

If you do you will have nightmares not dreams

The only means of strengthening one’s intellect is to make up one’s mind about nothing—to let the mind be a thoroughfare for all thoughts.

After Edna had gone home,her neighbours Mary and Annie had to vacuum the carpet where Edna had knocked over a box of biscuits of a crumbly nature and then trodden on them.
Edna is hard to relate to,said Annie nervously, her hands shaking with released  terror and humour
I wonder if she will get easier as time goes on?
You mean you are going to ask her again?
I’ve not decided,Mary told her.

It is a lot of effort in winter especially if the person  is boring.I prefer bad to  boring
I won’t ask you what you mean by bad  men.

Suppose she asks us over to her place,Annie pondered faintly
We’ll have to see how we feel.

I suppose it would be interesting to look at her furniture and see if she has any  books,Mary said softly
If we go and borrow a book, don’t pencil in your comments down the side of the page
As if I would! Mary said indignantly.I only do that to my own
Just sayin’ ,Annie replied, obviously feeling better
Did you like her purple coat?
I think it doesn’t go with red hair but who cares? I’d wear yellow even if I looked sick
That seem stupid,Mary cried anxiously
In the dark of winter it means drivers can see you Annie replied knowledgeably 
I suppose so.. yes, quite a wise idea.But one rarely sees a yellow coat in a shop.
I think you can get them in shops that sell sailing gear,Annie mumbled
Since we are right in the middle of England, there are none here.We’ll have to go to
Orford,Mary warned her
Where’s that,Annie asked rudely
Not far from Aldeburgh,Mary said knowingly
It’s too far to go in a day in winter,Annie decided immediately
How many miles is it?
About 159.468 each way
That is 319.435 miles altogether if my arithmetic is correct which it may not be, of course. Actually it’s wrong but only by a very small amount still using decimals and getting it wrong what a mistake for a mathematician to make in public.
So if we go at 60 mph it takes 5.3333 hours
And at 50 mph it takes 6.4 hours
40 mph would be 8 hours
10 mph would take 32 hours 
2 mph would be 160 hours

Stop, stop!

At 0.5 mph I think it’s 640 hours

Well that is that.We can’t go; it would be nearly 24 days nonstop

Just get a black coat and wear a yellow hat

After all that counting, they fell asleep until Emile came home with some mice for their tea.
And so shall I

When God came down , the rivers overflowed
Great trees were floating ,angled and exposed
The houses broke up like a loaf to crumbs
The hearts of humans trembled till they hummed

The winds deceived, the gusts unmeasured stung
The churchbells shuddered then untimely rang
The power was cut and all our screens were dark
Where were the rulers, where the saving Ark?

The women giving birth were paralysed
The babies in the womb took ill and died
Their cradles rocked the world, they swung so fast
And in a moment all of life had passed

In the void, God started his new world
Rich and strange, the grit and then the pearls

There was an old lady from Bude

Who had Tantrums when she heard the News

The human race stinks

The whole world has sunk

There is Goodness but that’s never viewed