As long as it doesn’t kill you

Doctor,I think my husband has something wrong with him.

Thank God, I thought he was dead!

Doctor I think I’m going deaf

What?

Doctor,I have a pain in my bed

Oh,do stop moaning; get a different bed

Why do I have bad feet doctor?

You’ve got the wrong sort of ethics

Doctor,my head feels strange. .

Can’t you just laugh it off?

Doctor,where is the receptionist?

She’s at a reception.

Doctor,you look worn out.

I shall take two aspirin and see myself in the morning.

If you can’t see yourself in the morning then things are serious indeed

But will anybody else be able to see you in the morning?

Doctor I thought I saw a rat.

It’s your imitation fur bedroom slipper.

Why do my shoulders ache at night?

Forgotten to take you hydroxychloroquine? Try sprinkling a little rat poison on your food instead. That will definitely weaken your immune system but as long as it doesn’t kill you we doctors are happy to give it to you. Because it will cure your rheumatoid arthritis m,my dear