Don’t call your child Lucifer as it may limit their job opportunities in adult life

They told me I have got a urinary tact infection

You have to be careful where you pass water then.

Do you think it might be a urinary tax inspection ?

You have to tell them how much urine you pass in a day. I’m not sure what are the rate of tax is

If you have sepsis you stop passing water and so getting sepsis could be aware of avoiding tax although it may only be for a very short time before you die and then you would not have to pay any kind of tax

Do you mean that we are allowed to die in this country without paying any tax?

Yes if it’s a sudden death.

When we have assisted dying then you can notify the tax office of the date you’ve chosen and ask them are you liable for tax? If not you could die twice for the same price. That is free

When they say that they’ve got a virus what they mean is that a virus has got them

Viruses that kill people are not very sensible because the viruses will die when you die or soon afterwards. Is that why they put you in the fridge?

What is this sense of humour you’ve developed today? I blame it on the doctor.

I thought she was going to diagnose me with cancer and all it was was a bloody infection.

If it’s bloody you might have crystals in your urine.

That sounds promising can I sell them to anybody?

You see everything is transactional now even friendship.

So I’m offering my friendship on the following formula

One for the price of two.

In other words I will be your friend if you pay me double the normal rate and anyway who tells us what’s the normal rate for friends to be paid or to pay?

Of course we all pay the price of our sins but that is in a metaphorical sense… sin diminishes us. It limits our perception and therefore our behaviour based on that perception. So anything that improves perception changes the world that we see and then our own actions will change it more for other people.

We don’t hear the words sin much nowadays. But that doesn’t mean that there is none.It is a cunning trick.

By the way some parents in Germany have been forbidden to call their child Lucifer. The judge said it might limit the child’s job opportunities in adult life

Do you think that I’ve made that up? No it was in one of the leading newspapers in Britain

And where are they leading us I wonder in this confusing and dangerous era?

Time will tell but there’s a lot of disaster around