My accent

My Irish accent was so bad it perforated UIster
I asked for Chicken Kerry not a Dead Duck
Do we really need Cork with everything?
I have Celtic feet not sweltering heat
I said,Donegal, not, don’t call
I said Castlebar not how far
I want a trim to my hair,Antrim I spy
I said Dublin, not “love in”
I said we went to Howth not I swore an oath
I said Nelson’s column not “hell is coming”
Where is County Teeth and why not Meath?
That’s a relief from belief
I like Tralee but does it like me?
Why is the Spanish lady Irish?