In a sidebar in Power Responsibility and Freedom Smail posits three laws that if understood fully would save everyone a lot of anxiety:
Law 1 “Absolutely everybody wants to be liked”.
Law 2 “Everyone feels different inside (less confident, less able, etc.) from how they infer other people to feel”.
Law 3 “Few honest and courageous people who have achieved anything of real value in life do not feel a fraud much of the time”.[6]
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/David_Smail_(psychologist)
How my heart sings 