Day: August 31, 2018
Still here
I went into a coffee shop and the waitress said,
Are you still here?
I looked round all the tables and I couldn’t see myself
So I said,No!
I went to the public library and the assistant said
What are you reading now?
So I said,I’m not.
I went to church and the priest said
How are you?
I said, I wonder myself what my mother did.
I bought a book on Amazon.
It’s not PC.
I wrote it myself.
I went to work and then remembered I have no job
I was making jam in Essex
Tiptree,it is called.
How did I get here,I asked myself
So far there is no reply
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The plastic tart
So vertical ,the mouse was a biped
A feat that engineering never bred
He looked into my eyes and then away
As if in wonder what words he might say.
But no, it is a plastic object made
To stop us getting hands that wildly ache
The little wheel is not for mice’s fun
But with a little turn, the cursor runs
Touchscreens are another recent feat
But touching hearts is good and far more sweet
My heart is open to the sun and frost
What is this life and what might living cost?
No longer living mice and feeling hearts
No, sincerely we must prostitute our art
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“Patience is a superpower”
http://www.oliverburkeman.com/blog/posts/patience-is-more-than-a-virtue-it-s-a-superpower
“And it’s hard to believe this inability to endure discomfort isn’t growing worse, as technology speeds up our lives. It’s more aggravating to wait 30 seconds for a microwave than an hour for an oven – just as it’s worse when a web page takes 10 seconds to load than when the reference librarian tells you it will take three weeks to track down a book. Perhaps it’s because in a world of almost-instant gratification, truly instant gratification starts to seem like our birthright.
Historically speaking, as Roberts points out, patience was a matter of “conforming yourself to the need to wait for things”; it was a way of accepting one’s lack of control over the world. But now we don’t need to wait for most things, patience has become a form of control over the world and, as she puts it, “over the tempo of contemporary life that otherwise controls us”. In this new environment, there’s nothing remotely passive about standing in front of a painting for three hours. On the contrary, it’s a subversive act. On the other side of impatience – if you can learn to wait out that jitteriness – lies power.”
(First published in Guardian Weekend magazine. Photo by Lux & Jourik on Flickr.)
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I can’t spell phablet
1.A Christian ,a Jew And a Muslim were walking through the Mall looking for a Coffee Shop.
They found a new one with lots of seats so they went inside and sat down.The Jew went over to the counter and asked, do you serve Cappuccinos?
The waitress answered,not usually, but in your case I’ll make an exception.
And my two friends?
Are they Cappuccinos as well?
Well, they are people of the Book like me.
I’m sorry .I meant to give it back.Are you going to fine me?
No, give us free coffee and we’ll say no more.
2.You know all those Coffee Shops staffed by foreigners?
Yeah.
The Government is going to build 7 meter high walls around them.
So America is going metric at last!
3.How can you tell I am a foreigner?
I’ll just shout.Wanna see a foreigner!
4.Why do we fear Arabs?
Because they invented al-gebra.
5.Why is the Pope a man?
We just have to take his word for it.
6.My husband asked me, what is post-modernism?
I replied, you didn’t need to marry me just to find that out
7.My wife asked, why do my rock buns fly?
I said because I am trying to kill that spider on the ceiling.
8.My son asked me to lend him my car for a week.
I said, it’s alright son, you can neck right here at home.
What about my Oedipal conflicts?
Use PayPal instead.
9.My daughter has got big blue eyes.
Where did she get those from?
Her grandmother.
Is she dead?
Not yet but Jesus wants her whole heart.
Don’t tell me he does transplants now!
10.I want to go to the lavatory.
They have closed all the public ones.
I should think so.Who wants to be watched all the time?
You’ll have to go in the telephone box.
I only have a Nokia 105.
Didn’t I tell you to get a phablet?
I’m not smart enough to spell that!
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The benefit of marriage
The Bedouins, refugees from other times
The Bedouins, refugees from other times
The places were they live are still the same
But other people founded States and took
The deserts where they roamed ,ancestral nooks.
Ther little tents of black on the hillsides
Have not changed from Mediaeval times
But now they are like flies, unwanted guests
Who will know the tremor in their breasts?
Cruel is the heart of humankind,
The Commandments spat on daily by men blind.
The Bedouins of our spirit need to be
Allowed their space, allowed their deserts free
Nomads of the desert,Jesus Christ,
Nomad of the darkness in our minds
How my heart sings 