Day: August 20, 2018

Ah don’t know Dad.

When  ah got ‘ome he said
Put wood in th’ hole
I didn”t got to College to learn to talk like that,I shouted
Whur did ye go to?
Lady Target’s Bowl
So what are you mitherin’ us about now
They don’t say mitherin’  down there
That’s their loss
My,. you sound like Richard Dimbleby
Who he?
Well, let’s say  he never went to Lady Target’s
Why not!
It was only for women.
How sexist <Give is a barmcake, our Kath.
Here y’are,Dad.
Ye’ve not buttered it.
Ye never said
Am sayin now
Oh,put the lid on it
Why not put a cork in it?
Close the door on  it
See ye can talk proper,after all.
So wood in th’ ole is improper?
You sound like Fowlers Modern English Usage
Who’s he when he’s at home?
He must be proper
Like some verbs?
Ah did   learn Latin in Church at Mass
D’ye think God would like that? Ye should be prayin’ Kath
It was prayin’ in Latin
So God  likes Latin?
Adveniat Regnum Tuum
Sicut in Coelo et in Terror
I’ll seek it anywhere!
Fiat Voluntas Tuas
Notre pere, qui est Hosiah
That’s  not right!
Au ciel de ma maman, je t’adore.
So is it wrong?
Not in fuzzy logic.
I didn’t send you to Uni to learn  fuzzy logic
That’s true but we Iearned it by osmosis
Ae ye kiddin’?
Aye,I am.I learned it from Professor Blogge
Ah’ll kill  ‘im
That’s a sin
Who’re you,Saint Peter ?
Get thee hence
Gi’ us a nicker
Be careful. The PC police are outside
What, a b$gger
There are  two!

Manchester City United

1. Saying/ word: Barm

Meaning: Bread roll

2. Saying/ word: Put wood in th’ole

Meaning: Shut the door

3. Saying/ word: Corporation pop

Meaning: Water

4. Saying/ word: It’s cracking flags

Meaning: it is so hot outside that stone pavings are breaking

5. Saying/ word: Use yer loaf

Meaning: Think for yourself

6. Saying/ word: I’ve not got out fort do

Meaning: I don’t have anything to do

7. Saying/ word: A’v cum b’out any money

Meaning: I’m afraid I haven’t got any cash on me today

8. Saying/ word: Stop skriking

Meaning: Stop crying

Bury

selective focus photography of manchester city sports bottle
Photo by Ahmed Aqtai on Pexels.com

1. Saying/ word: Ratchet

Meaning: Cool

2. Saying/ word: Mitherin’

Meaning: Annoying/pestering

3. Saying/ word: Wot you sayin’?

Meaning: Hello, do you have anything interesting to say?

4. Saying/ word: Proper reet good

Meaning: That is very good

5. Saying/ word: Give us a nicker

Meaning: Please may I have a pound

Self-deception  shields us from our doubt

 
Between the wish for  changlessness and thrill
We seldom will be satisfied for long
Neither is controlled by human will
As into  stormy life, we all are flung

Self-deception  shields us from our doubts
We choose to pre-select what we will see.
Pretend to know what our life’s  all about

As in little boats ,we ride a stormy sea.

Then  later we choose danger for its spice
And with daring climb the mountain with no ropes
We resist the offer of    advice
Till ,with broken bones, we sadly mope.
Reality’s too little or too much
So ,on our path, our hearts will often lurch

The skin on my arm

I see your writing on this birthday card
I am sad
As I hold  out the card , I see the skin on my arm
Looks decorative  like sand and shingle as the tide flows back
And surges  up again.There are patterns on my skin
I could devote my life to finding the right equation
A wave equation
Or topology? Ribbed rubber  like old sheaths
Stitched together by the wind and sun
I might put paint on them and sell my arm at auction
You’d have to buy me as well
And feed me.I am a food avoidant personality
It’s the latest, it’s  a  new disorder
I live on weetabix and cheese
Chips with salt, no fish
It’s a wonder I have a skin at all
But if I say.no
You have to  believe me

Exactly what he said

Exactly what he said,we can’t recall
The software  that he left has uninstalled
Not  by any human agent here
Allow the dread and do not turn from fear
We know just  how he overcame St Paul

On a journey Paul heard a fierce call
Why do you hate Jesus and his toil?
Bitter is the blood and taste of gall
Demons ugly from  old trees will hear
Exactly what he said,

Give yourself  but only God gives all
Do you believe these narratives enthrall?
Jesus, symbol,suffering, human, here
Every human  swims among their tears
Everybody  suffers, must endure
Even in the magic Shopping Mall
Exactly, what he said?
Oh.God is dead.

 

 

 

The Anniversary

  • Sex,love,cats and St ValentineStan was wearing his best suit,topped by a denim apron, and wad polishing the big windows with a microfibre cloth ,as he waited breathlessly for his stunning wife.Mary entered the room wearing a long purple and mauve dress which clung somewhat tightly to the curvaceous contours of her beautifully rounded body.
    On her feet she had some smart pewter ballet slippers and in her elegant hand she carried a huge pewter clutch bag which contained some of her many medications.She addressed Stan,
    “I think I can leave my handbag behind if I put my mouth spray into my bra.”
    “That somehow detracts from the romance of the evening.” Stan pronounced openly.
    “Well,you know,I never had a cleavage until lately and I fell I ought to make the most of it.”
    “Surely I should be the one make the most of it,” he riposted jocosely.
    “Of course you may,my angel,but not in the restaurant,”she answered back sweetly
    “I’ll put your spray in my pocket then,shall I?”Suddenly the doorbell rang.”Who’s this?”It was Annie,their next door neighbour.
    She was wearing a coral velvet track suit with matching Reeboks and sun hat.
    “Hi,I just came in with a little prezzie,”She declaimed.In
    her hand was a huge box of chocolates.
    “Gosh,Mary you look lovely in that beautiful long dress but you’re not
    going on your bike,are you?”
    “No,we are having a cab,but it’s not come as yet.”
    “Well,never mind.I’ll ring 999 and get them to send an emergency ambulance for you!”
    Fortunately,as luck would have it the minicab appeared and it was only as they were entering the restaurant that Stan realised he was still wearing his old denim apron.
    “Shall I take it off?” he pondered.
    On the pro side I will look smarter on the con side I might spill some soup down my front.I wish I’d done more logic at college.
    So he kept it on.Mary didn’t seem to notice.She just took him for granted.If he stood on his head and sang”Jerusalem” she probably wouldn’t pay any attention.
    Then he noticed that Mary was wearing an apron too.It was the same colour as her dress.What a brilliant idea,he thought.
    “There may be money in this.” He could start a small business,
    “Aprons R You” selling lovely aprons in all colours of the rainbow.
    Suddenly he heard noises;he awoke and heard Mary shouting
    “How can you go to sleep when you are out with me?”
    “Would you prefer me to recite the Periodic Table?” he snapped gently.
    “I’d prefer a poem,” she cried…All right,Petal,I’ll think of one soon.In the meantime would you like a fool?”
    “No.I’ve got you,” she responded handsomely.
    “I mean for a pudding?”
    “Oh,yes please.A Rubik fool would be lovely.It will pass the time.You know I get so bored.”
    “Well,I do my best but it’s hard keeping up with you.would you like to read a few truth tables whilst I finish my meat.”
    He put his hand in his pocket and pulled out a small leather bound book.
    “Truth tables and levitation for geniuses,” by Bertha Russell.
    “Oh,Stan,this looks interesting.I’ve always wanted to fly like an angel or an owl.”
    “It’s never too late to say never.” he responded.
    “Whatever do you mean?”
    “I don’t know.Just because a sentence is grammatically correct doesn’t imply that it means something.”
    “Yes,quite right.And conversely a sentence can mean something even when it’s not grammatically correct.”“Isn’t thinking exciting!”
    “Yes,indeed.I was thinking how exciting it will be to go to bed with you.”
    “Wow,good grammar and full of meaning.I am yours.I am like a ripe plum ready to drop off the tree.I am a cat ready to mate.I am a song waiting to be sung.”
    “Gosh,are metaphors your bete noir?”
    “Je ne parle pas Francais.”
    “Aimez vous ein Nederlander?”
    “Sprechen sie Deutsche?”
    Ist sein mutter immer krank?”

    photo0189

Our iron habitat

May I  have your seat I’m feeling odd?
I recognise you,you’re Almighty God
Where’d’ye get that suit and that top hat?
Oh,Leonard Cohen wanted one like that
Do not strike me with your iron rod

God is inside , lives in  holy  blood
We  connect,respect and so we should
Jesus is the beggar ,cold and sad
Give her help in our iron habitat
May I  have your seat ,  Lord Krishna said?

Love and hate would toss us  if they could
Get perspective, rise above the flood
Climb the mountain pikes, abhorr the flat
We need to change positions, where’re ye  at?
Another point of view won’t drive you mad
May I  have your seat ,I looked at God

 

 

Loving each other:science and poetry

sun fire hot research
Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

https://www.newstatesman.com/culture/poetry/2016/06/love-affair-between-science-and-poetry

Extract

Frontiers in Neurology reported that the expression of science through poetry could enrich and better kids’ understanding of science education, in schools. According to the research, it encouraged use of their imagination to deconstruct and reconstruct their learned knowledge. Critiquing and analysing thus could facilitate learning.

Emily Dodd, aficionado and writer of scientific poetry and screenwriter for CBeebies science programs tells me: “There’s something to be said for communicating science creatively and seeing how much knowledge is retained or if people are interested enough to look for more information afterwards.” What she wants to know is why we lose that desire to understand and how we can bring back that desire and the joy that comes with discovery.

This very tendency to reduce things to their minute components is science’s premise and so it is sometimes criticised for losing sight of the wholeness and larger human meaning. John Keats, who trained as a surgeon and apothecary before committing himself to poetry, famously said:

“There was an awful rainbow once in heaven:

We know her woof, her texture; she is given

In the dull catalogue of common things.”

This roughly translates as science ruins the beauty of things by dissecting it into its components. It’s worth noting, though, that Keats was a part of the Romantic era wherein poets were confronted by the Industrial Revolution and the idea that science and technology would pave the way for the future was for them, terrifying.

Johann Wolfgang von Goethe is perhaps the biggest exception to the norm.  A German, and born in 1749, he was a writer and a scientist but he always regarded his contribution to the science of colour far greater than any literature he wrote. His work includes poetry written in a variety of metres and styles, prose and verse dramas; memoirs, an autobiography, literary criticism, papers on botany, anatomy, and colour and four novels.

One of his biggest passions was the study of clouds and in an act of pronounced love and respect between a poet and scientist, he wrote a poem about each of the different classifications of clouds (nimbus, cirrus, cumulus and stratus) and an ode to the scientist who devised them, Luke Howard, as a declaration of his admiration for Howard’s scientific skills.

“To find yourself in the infinite,
You must distinguish and then combine;
Therefore my winged song thanks
The man who distinguished cloud from cloud.”

When will tomorrow come?

Is it tomorrow yet?
What shall I dream of tonight?
Shall I sleep in my own bed or in the cat’s?
Am I the cat’s mother?
What are the patriot’s games?
Is Ireland a Jewish State as Jesus was a Jew [ maybe he still is]?
Can anyone be a Catholic? How can you tell?
Can I be buried with glee?
Do you like Jennifer Warnes?
I love her with all I have
Praise be the Chord