Hello,you must be the expert the police send to see if our alarms work
Oh,I am so lonely I am glad you came.I’ll give you a key to save trouble
Would you like to take this jewellery to the Charity Shop?I can’t ride my bike any more so I’d be delighted
Can you make me some tea while you are here.I have got insomnia and the heat makes me feel thirsty
Help yourself but please leave the duvet.I have too much stuff in here
I have 2 coats downstairs you might like.
I am too old for sex but you might like to hold my handfor a minute
I have to see the shrink tomorrow.Are you real or an hallucination?
My cat is very bad tempered but her mioawing is not as bad as her bites and scratches.
I am sorry.Are you Welsh or Lithuanian?
My husband is in that box.He’s called Jack.He is dead, actually but we still share the bed.Is that a sin?
I’ve had some odd dreams but this is the worst.Shut the window and go out by the door. like normal people do
I know normal is a word with several meanings I don’t teach unpaid any more.
You want to know what the average is? Not Boris Johnson
How my heart sings 
What a fun read! You made me laugh. The burglar would probably be so horrified that they change their ways.😀
Hello Khaya.Thanks so much.Once some men got into my house but the police said my bedroom was so untidy they couldn’t have found anything.But I don’t have any real jewellery.
The burglar would probably say “Goodbye Madam, i think i came to the wrong planet”. This was fun to read. 👍🌸
I think if they managed to get onto my bedroom they would be horrified and probably run away!Yes, not expressing fear might be a food tactic…ask them to make tea and they’d go mad!
Hahahahha you have great sense of humor. 😁
I need it with the arthritis and other problems.As they say,sink or swim.I never had a sense of humour till I began writing 8 years ago.So you are never too old top change or do new things.