Six ways to have better sex

1.Get undressed  especially if you wear elasticated, skinny jeans which are hard to remove.
2 Have a bath
3.Make sure you know their name.
4 Put the cat out or….
5.If you have sex in the garden,put the cat in!
6.Grow a thick hedge in the garden as while it is growing it gives you time to find a lover gay or miserable.

Don’t let them take any photos unless you are married [ to them]